“You know what sort of advantage I’d like? The napping kind.” I fold my arms under my head and stretch out.
She nudges me with a toe impatiently, and I curl in toward her and bring her down to the floor. She gasps, somewhere between pleasantly surprised and angry, and I smile.
“All right,” I say. “We can fight fairly now.”
She glares at me through a few misplaced strands of dark hair. “You’re very competitive, you know that?” she says with a huff.
I smirk. “More competitive than you, I bet.”
She shakes her head, holding up a hand to stop me. “As I was saying, between you and me you have the advantage. I can’t sense you, which means I’m going to be like every other dueler you face. You can sense me, and I can’t sense you. Right?”
I pull myself to my feet. “Yeah, except my abilities don’t work the same way as yours. When you make someone see an illusion, you see it too, right?”
She nods.
“My illusions don’t work like that,” I say. “I can’t see what I make other people see, which is very funny to watch, but also not very useful to me. How do I know if what I’m making you see is really there?”
“I think it’s even more useful,” Esther says. “At the execution, you made everyone hear loud bells and you made their vision go dark. That didn’t affect you, so you were able to run through the crowd unharmed. That’s an advantage I’ve never had, and that’s how you were able to save your friend.”
“That’s me! I’m that friend!” Hat shouts from outside the door. She skids into the room. “I ran here all the way from Med Ward.” She pulls off her apron and hat and stuffs them into a shoulder bag.
“What are you doing here?” I ask.
“Glenquartz told me you’re sparring,” Hat says. “That means I’ll get to see one or both of you get beaten up by the other. I can’t think of a better way to spend an afternoon.” She sits at the edge of the mat and leans forward on her knees.
I point at her. “You are a menace.”
Esther objects. “It’s good that she stays. You’ll have observers at the festival, so you’ll have to be able to focus when you’re the center of attention. Hat will be a good audience.” Esther winks at Hat.
“I love being the center of attention,” I say sarcastically.
“You watch Coin,” Esther says to Hat. “If we do this right, you’ll be able to see her actions and I won’t. If she makes any mistakes, you let me know, okay?”
Hat jumps to her feet eagerly.
“Now,” Esther says, “I want us to work on three things. One: I want you to make it so I can’t see you. Two: make me see you somewhere else. Three: control a secondary illusion while you fight, like snakes or storm clouds or lightning. The things you want to practice most are not letting the magic distract you from the fight and not letting the fight distract you from the magic.”
I groan. “I’m not good at multitasking. I’m good at focusing. One thing, over and over until I’m an expert.”
“In duels,” Esther explains, “there is going to be very little physical contact. Mostly swords and padded clothing. If you do get ahold of someone, though, you can put them to sleep or use something in their memories against them. If you can find out what they fear, you can find a way to control them. If I was afraid of snakes or spiders, for example, you could use those against me.”
“Or snake-spiders,” I say.
Esther smiles. “You may remember that visual hallucinations are the easiest, but if you want to make people hear or feel things, it’s more difficult. It all gets easier with physical contact, because that’s what gives you direct access into their mind.”
“So why can’t I just look at a challenger and make them feel pain?” I say, knowing I sound a bit like a monster.
“It’s dicey,” Esther says. “It’s not as effective as you think. As soon as you stop, it fades pretty fast, since it wasn’t real to begin with. You could stop someone in the middle of a fight and make them stumble, but it would be unlikely to convince them to stop dueling you. What was the first thing you did with your abilities?”
I sigh, trying to remember. “I saw the memory of a Royal and got my first glimpse of King Fallow on his deathbed. Then, in the market, when Hat was in danger, this idiot cadet was about to use his secondary weapon to execute her for an unconfirmed class-one offense! I shouted to quiet down the marketplace, and I think I used my ability to make sure everyone heard me. I didn’t quite understand my abilities yet, but that’s what happened.”
Esther appraises me. “I’d like to point out that the first time you used your abilities was to help someone. The first time I used mine was to steal sweets from the kitchen. But…the way you talk about your life is…It’s a series of insane events, and you talk about them so casually.”
“It’s my normal,” I say with a shrug. “Or it was.”
Esther gestures at the pair of us, practicing magic and sparring in preparation for the Assassins’ Festival. “I think it’s still your normal.”
“And you give speeches,” I say, “and live your life as a stage actor. That must seem normal to you. Do you wonder if King Fallow, when he talked about the crowns being reunited, which of us he meant? I mean, obviously he thought something was supposed to happen since I’m Nameless. But I don’t know what that is.”
“I think he meant for it to be you,” Esther says. “He didn’t choose to give me the crown. His brother did. He picked you. He didn’t pick me.”
She stares distractedly up at the ceiling.
“I guess we’re both in the dark,” I say.
“I don’t know exactly what he thought would happen or what he was afraid would happen,” Esther says. “All I know is that I’m going to help you stay alive.”
“Sounds like a plan to me.”
“Okay, then. I want you to create the illusion of rain,” she says, “and I want you to maintain it when I come at you.” She wipes at her skin, brushing off invisible flecks of rainwater.
Hat giggles at the absurdity of it. Neither of us can see what Esther sees.
Esther lashes out and, after a few jabs, stops.
“The illusion slipped,” she says.
I groan in frustration and punch the wall with my gloved fist.
“I think I might know why it’s so difficult for you,” Esther says. “You’ve already seen your disadvantage, what Belrosa can do to you. You’re letting it get in your head and distract you.”