“Where would I sneak off to have hot, crazy sex with your brother if I did that?”
I gag. “God that mental picture is now burned in my brain.”
“You’re welcome!”
I get in the car before anyone can say anything else. Now, I’ll have nightmares of them as well as what Sean and Devney will be like after they return from their honeymoon. I take the scenic route as I make the drive back to the Arrowood farm.
The corner store where I had my first job is still there. So is the gas station with the old pumps that they won’t change out because the new ones are complicated. Then there are the new things like the bakery that Mrs. Symonds’s daughter owns, a pizza place, and a dairy barn.
It’s the same in so many ways, but it feels different. It was like the first night after my mother died. Everything was there, just as it always had been, and yet, it was as though the house were empty. The most important thing was gone, and that void has remained.
After a few winding turns, I get to the entrance.
It doesn’t matter that in the last eighteen months I’ve been here several times. I still feel the same knot in my stomach as I get to the gate.
I stare up at the sign that has been there for fifty years and sigh.
“What’s one truth about an arrow?” I ask as I look up, wishing it were my mother’s voice asking. “Removing half the feather will create the curve and alter its course.”
She always made it seem like we needed to stick together, but in the last few months, I’ve realized that isn’t it. How does removing the feathers or creating a curve bond us together? It doesn’t. She clearly thought I needed to change directions—I think. Is it because I’m the one who always bends? Is it because I need to remove something in my life? Or that I never follow the right path? She never explained it, she would just smile and tell me that one day I’d understand.
Well, I’d like that day to hurry up and get here because it’s pretty lame not to understand what the hell my meaning even means. My brothers had lightning strikes with theirs, and I’m over here, still trying to figure out a riddle that no one has the answer to.
“A little help here, Mom,” I say. “I don’t think I’m asking for too much after all these years. The other three idiots got easy ones, but you gave me the one that requires an answer key.” I feel like an idiot looking up at the sign as though she’s going to answer. Still, there’s an overwhelming sense of her around me. “What would you think of all of us now? Would you at least be happy with three out of four of us being married? Well, Sean isn’t yet, but he will be in, like, four days.”
The sun peeks out of the clouds, and I smile. I thought she would be happy.
I get up to the house, and there’s a car there.
I park next to it, not knowing who the hell would be at the house since my brother is in the Caribbean.
As I open the door and get out, a woman emerges from the other car. Her long red hair blows softly in the spring breeze, her blue eyes lock on mine, and for a moment, I don’t know who I am. Everything escapes me. My name, where I am, the ability to breathe and think is gone.
I’ve seen beauty before.
I’ve known women who are every man’s desire, but this woman is . . . something else.
“Hi.” She waves tentatively as I stand there, staring. “Are you . . .” I watch as awareness strikes her. “Oh. You’re Jacob Arrowood. I’m . . . I didn’t think . . . I mean, I just . . . yeah, I’m Brenna Allen. I bought the house that Devney owned. It’s just down the road a bit. I guess her brother lived there before. I’m sure you know that since you’re from here and all, and . . . I’m rambling. But, anyway, I came by to bring this.” Brenna lifts a casserole dish. “It’s for Ellie, but I’m not sure where her house is since it’s a little confusing . . .”
Brenna’s voice drops, and she pulls her lower lip between her teeth. I need to say something instead of standing here like a fucking idiot. “Okay.”
Okay?
That’s the best I can come up with. Jesus, I need to be slapped. I clear my throat and try again. “I mean, thank you, I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”
“Is Ellie here?”
“They live a little down the road that way. It’s the third driveway.”
Brenna closes her eyes and sighs. “I’m sorry. Ellie mentioned it was past the main house, but I don’t know which one the main house is.”
“This is the main house.”
“I see that now.” Her cheeks blaze, and she ducks her head. “Well, what about Devney? I’d love to say hi since . . . I’m guessing this is her house?”
“Yeah, that would be great. I’m sure she’d love to see you, but my brother whisked her away to St. Lucia.”
“Oh! Wow. That’s one heck of a whisk.”
I smile—or, at least, that’s what I hope I do. “Yeah, my brother is a romantic at heart. He is surprising her by proposing and then marrying her in a few days.”
Brenna tucks her hair behind her ear. “That’s sweet.”
“Or really stupid if she says no and he’s paid for all of us to fly out there to celebrate a wedding that won’t happen.”
Her deep blue eyes look up, nearly taking my breath away. “Luke always said a man only asked that question when he knew the answer.” She laughs. “I would hope that your brother is confident.”
I take a step toward her, wanting to ease the look of pain in her eyes, and then stop myself. “I’m sorry to hear about Luke. I didn’t know him well. He was a few years ahead of me.”
No idea what possessed me to explain that, but at least I’m talking in full sentences.
“Thank you. We miss him a lot. It’s always so weird when people say they’re sorry.” She smiles. “I mean . . . I appreciate your saying it. It’s just that we’re finding a new normal and doing our best even though we miss him. My son, Sebastian, especially.”
I remember that. After Mom died, people were always apologizing, but we were just trying to live without the core of our family. I feel like an ass for bringing it up.
“Ellie mentioned your son is a big fan of Navigator.”
She nods. “Yes, he loves you. You play a superhero that happens to be a fighter pilot as your day job in the movie, so . . . I’m sure that’s a part of it. I don’t know why I just explained what you do since you clearly know that. Anyway, he pretty much worships the ground you walk on.”
I laugh. “That must be shaky ground then.”
Brenna’s smile is soft as she takes a step back. “I’m sure you’re worthy of the praise. After all, you’re willing to spend time with a kid you’ve never met. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it.”
“I lost my mother at a very young age, and I remember all too well how hard that was. I think her death shaped all of our lives in a lot of ways, so if there is a way for me to help someone through a similar situation, I’m happy to do it.”
“You’re very sweet to say that, Jacob. Or is it Jake? I never know, and I hate to assume.”
“Jacob. Only one person is allowed to call me Jake. She’s nine and pretty much owns all of her uncles.”