Everyone laughed, including Penny, and boy, did she need that laugh.
Izzy nudged Tracey and said, “Speaking of single men, Mr. Hard Body is looking pretty delicious in that suit.”
Penny followed Izzy’s gaze to Desmond “Diesel” Black striding across the dance floor, stoic faced, eyes trained on Tracey. Diesel was a bartender at Whiskey Bro’s and a Nomad Dark Knight. His crisp white shirt strained across his bulbous biceps and chest, his slacks stretched to the limit over his massive thighs. Talk about a man of few words, Diesel grunted more than he spoke, and Penny swore he looked like he was going to throw Tracey over his shoulder and haul her off to his cave.
“Wow. He sure cleans up nicely.” Roni gazed lovingly at Quincy and said, “But not quite as nice as my guy.”
Tracey was staring at Diesel like it was the first time she’d ever seen him.
“Did you ever find out why he wanted to know if you had a date for the wedding?” Gemma asked.
Tracey scoffed, though her eyes never left Diesel as she said, “When I learn how to decipher a grunt, I’ll let you know what the reason was.”
“Uncle Diesel!” Kennedy skipped over to Diesel in her frilly blue dress and Mary Janes, stopping him by the edge of the dance floor. His chiseled features didn’t soften as Kennedy took his hand and pulled him toward the middle of the floor.
A few feet away, Lincoln was standing on Truman’s feet, holding his hands as they danced. Penny warmed at the sight of them, picturing Scott doing the same with their baby one day. The lump that had lodged in her throat earlier returned with a vengeance. Why did she even play with those thoughts?
As her friends talked, Penny gazed out at the gardens and saw Scott making a beeline for her. His jaw was tight, chin low, making her stomach twist into knots.
Roni moved closer to her and said, “Now, that’s a man on a mission if I’ve ever seen one.”
Penny got more nervous with Scott’s every step as he closed the distance between them. She told herself not to make a scene, to hold herself together, but she felt nauseous, and she didn’t know if it was the pregnancy or the fact that since she’d decided to do the only fair thing, she was afraid if she opened her mouth, it would tumble out.
Panic rose in Penny’s chest, and she turned away from Scott to try to regain control just as Lincoln ran off the dance floor, hollering, “DancewifmeBooful!” He grabbed Roni’s hand, tugging her toward the dance floor.
Penny focused on a spot on the floor in an effort to calm herself down.
“Little dude, you’re always stealing my girl,” Quincy joked. “Hey, Pen…?” He touched her arm. “You don’t look so good. Are you okay?”
She knew what she had to do. Drawing upon all of her courage, Penny said, “No, but hopefully I will be.” As Scott stepped into the colonnade, she looked at Quincy and said, “Save me a spot on your shoulder, will you?”
THERE WAS A storm brewing inside Scott, and if he didn’t stop it, it was going to drown him. It had been torture watching Penny cry during the ceremony knowing it was his fault. He’d wanted to take her into his arms and apologize for the hell he’d caused. On top of that, standing for family photographs without her had left him feeling off-balance and empty. He couldn’t take it anymore.
“Hey, sweets,” he said gruffly. “Can you come with me, please?”
He reached for her hand, and as she took it, the smile that usually lit up the room barely reached her eyes, cutting him like a knife. She went with him, but he felt a difference in her touch and in the energy she gave off, as if she’d already erected a wall between them.
“Where are we going?” she asked in a pained voice as they made their way across the lawn.
“I want you in the pictures with us.”
“What?” Penny stopped cold, tears welling in her eyes. “No.” She took a step back, shaking her head. “I can’t be in the pictures with you and your family when I don’t know if we’re even going to be together tomorrow.” Her voice escalated as tears streamed down her cheeks. “I can’t…I can’t do this.”
“I can’t either, Pen. I—”
“Don’t!” she shouted, sobs distorting the word. “Don’t say it.” She turned and stalked away from him and the reception.
He went after her, gently taking her hand, and said, “Please, just hear me out.”
“I can’t do this here,” she hissed. “I don’t want everyone witnessing you breaking up with me. I know you don’t want kids, and you know I do, and I love you too much to force you into a life you don’t want.” Sobs tumbled out, and she covered her face with her hands, talking from behind them. “God! Just say it. Get it over with.”
“Sweetheart, I am so sorry for making you cry.” He gathered her quaking body in his arms, his heart swelling and breaking at once. “I don’t want to end things with you, Penny. I can’t imagine a day without you, much less a lifetime.”
She seemed to hold her breath, her face still buried in his chest. Then she tipped her face up, eyes swollen and confused, nose pink, and cheeks as wet as rain. “What?”
He cradled her face in his hands, wiping her tears with his thumbs. His heart was beating so hard, he was sure she could feel it pounding between them. “I’m so scared of becoming my father, I almost let it ruin the best thing I’ve ever had. But I’m not going to let that bastard take one more thing from me. I love you so damn much, Penny. I never wanted—want—to hurt or disappoint you, and I realized today that you and my sisters are right. I love children. I love their smiles, their laughter, their cuddles. I love them too much to ever hurt them. But the fear is real, Penny, and I can’t just shake it off. When I was standing down there with all the guys and their wives and children, I realized that I didn’t have to shake it off. Being scared is the solution, not the problem.”
“I don’t understand.” She blinked repeatedly. “What are you saying? What solution?”
“I’m saying that instead of giving in to the fear and letting it ruin us, I’ll go to therapy, figure out where that fear is buried, and dig that son of a bitch out. I’ll take that fear apart piece by piece until I have all my shit figured out.”
Hope rose in her eyes, bringing more tears. “You will?”
“Yes. I love you, Penny. You’re my soul mate, my best friend, my eye of the fucking storm, and I want our clothes in one closet and a dresser just for you. I want little girls who wrap me around their tiny fingers, keep their hair up with colorful clips and straws, and dole out love like they have an endless supply. I want little boys who run through the woods, jump off docks, and protect their sisters from snakes and bullies—but never have to worry about protecting them from me.”
Her tears flooded against his thumbs, and a sob fell from her lips.
“I’m all in, sweetheart. In for a penny, in for a pound, and I will stop at nothing to become the man that you deserve.”
“Oh, Scotty!” She threw her arms around him, sobbing against his chest. “You’ve always been the man that I deserve.”
She clung to him like she wanted to burrow deep inside him. But she was already there, as much a part of him as the air he breathed, easing the storm.