8
Caroline
We can’t.
Those two words have been haunting me for days now.
For the most part, things with Cooper have gone back to normal. Or as normal as things can be between two best friends who kissed.
It’s as if there’s a thin cloud of uncertainty just floating above us, waiting to crack open and shake everything up again.
Part of me wanted to tell Cooper to keep going, wanted to see how far we’d take it.
But the other, more logical part of my brain said to stop.
Crossing that line would be a bad idea. He’s too important to me to lose over something like sex. I don’t want to risk my friendship with him all for a good lay.
And I know it would be a good lay too.
If Cooper can fuck half as good as he can kiss…
“Earth to Caroline.” River waves her hand in front of my face. “Company meeting here.”
I give myself a shake, dragging my attention back to the task at hand.
It’s Wednesday morning and we’re discussing the big event we have in a month.
Every year our community throws the Harristown Jubilee, a big gathering of food trucks, music, and whatever else anyone wants to sell. Homemade pastries, home goods, clothes—anything goes. The event is huge, and sellers tend to make their booth fees back within the hour, not to mention the foot traffic and getting your name out there is priceless.
I should probably be paying attention since we’ll all be there running the food truck we turned into the mobile closet this year.
“Sorry,” I say. “I’m listening.”
A frown pulls at her lips. “You okay?”
“Fine, fine.” I nod, waving off her concern, reaching across the counter for the coffees she brought us. “Just didn’t sleep well last night is all. I’m tired. Not that I have to tell you about that.”
River has insomnia and has come to work on little sleep many times over the last few years.
Luckily, with her new relationship with Dean, she seems to be taking more time off work and not letting the stress get to her as much. It’s doing wonders for her disorder.
“You look like you’re a million miles away, not tired. This isn’t just company talk time. It’s girl talk time too. What’s going on?” asks Maya, our other partner, tossing her long chocolate-colored hair over her shoulder.
Maya and River have been best friends since they were little and have been through everything together, including Maya’s teenage pregnancy and her recent divorce.
They’re more like sisters than they are friends.
“Yeah, talk to us,” River urges. “Something going on with Cooper?”
I try not to react. Try not to let on that something happened between us.
I tuck a hair behind my ear. “No. Cooper’s fine. We’re fine.”
“Liar!” Maya shouts, pointing at me. “She’s a liar! Did you see it?”
“I saw it,” River says, nodding.
“Saw what?”
“You tucked your hair behind your ear—it’s your tell. You’re hiding something.”
“I’m not hiding anything,” I tell Maya. “There’s nothing to hide. And I do not have a tell.”
“Uh-huh. This explains why you’ve been walking around here like a zombie since last Friday. Something definitely happened and you’re not fooling us.”
“Oh my gosh.” River gasps. “Did you finally get laid?”
“What?”
“On your night out with Cooper,” she continues. “Did you meet some hot guy and finally get some action?”
Oh. That.
Did I get laid? No.
Did I have the best kiss I’ve ever had? Yes.
Can I still feel my lips tingling? Still feel his mouth ghosting up my leg? Double yes.
Do I wish I would have had the courage to tell Cooper to keep going instead of to stop? Yes.
“No, I didn’t get laid.” I take a sip from my coffee. “But I do have a date tonight.”
Despite Cooper’s warning that it won’t work and it’s not a smart idea, I haven’t canceled my date with Jason. We’re supposed to meet for drinks tonight at nine.
There’s a nagging feeling in my gut telling me not to go, but I want to do everything I can to put what happened with Cooper out of my mind and move on.
Going out with Jason would be moving on.
I should go…right?
“With whom?”
“Remember a few months ago when I told you about that guy I kept running into at the bookstore?” They both nod. “It’s him. We happened upon one another the other day and he finally asked.”
“Oh,” River says.
They exchange a look but don’t say anything.
I have a best friend. I know exactly what that look means.
“What?” I ask.
“It’s nothing,” Maya says with a shrug.
I lift a brow at her.
She sighs. “It’s just…well…we thought—”
“That you and Cooper were going to get together,” River finishes for her.
Now it’s my turn to sigh.
“Guys…” I draw the word out. “Cooper and I…”
“Are perfect for each other,” Maya supplies, her best friend bobbing her head in agreement. “Everyone knows the best couples start out as friends.”
“Or enemies,” River interjects.
“Please.” Maya rolls her alluring gray eyes. “You and Dean were never enemies, just idiots who wanted to bump uglies and were too chicken to say so.” She turns her attention to me. “You do have feelings for him, don’t you?”
“No!”
It comes out quickly.
Too quickly.
They exchange another glance.
I huff. “I mean, I don’t know. I didn’t. Not until…”
“Until what?” River prompts. “Did something happen? Other than you seeing him naked, I mean.”
I nod and hate that my cheeks heat at the thought of seeing Cooper naked.
Hate that the ache that’s seemed to assume a permanent place between my thighs pulses to let me know it’s still there.
“We…uh…we kind of kissed.”
“Kind of kissed? Or full-on tongue-fucked each other?”
“River!” Maya scolds, laughing at her crassness. “Can’t you see the poor girl is already dying of embarrassment? Do you have to be so…you?”
River ignores her. “Was it Friday when you two went out?”
Another nod.
“Ha!” She snaps her fingers together. “I knew it! I knew something was brewing there.”
“No you didn’t.”
“Did too. There was something different about you two at the diner, something that wasn’t there before.”
“I’d just seen him naked for the first time—that’s going to change some things.”
She shakes her head, her long red waves bouncing with the movement. “No. It was something else—something more. There was this electricity.”
“Man, I am so mad I missed that.”
“Blame that lazy freakin’ kid of yours for sleeping in again and missing breakfast,” River tells Maya. “All he does is sleep these days.”