Dropping one of her bags on the floor by her feet, India offered. “This place still looks like a mausoleum.”
“Mom has a very specific aesthetic.”
“She just likes reminding people she could probably buy and sell them.”
“That too.”
“You are going to have to childproof this place,” India stated as she walked deeper into the house.
Dressed in a white spaghetti-strapped sundress, she looked like a young mother. Her brown curls formed a halo around her face. She used to keep her hair short. She would complain that taking care of it was more work than it was worth, but he used to love her hair. He still loved her hair.
“I’ll start looking into it.”
“I brought some clothes, diapers, and a pack and play. He can sleep in there for a night or two while you go and get him a real crib and set up a nursery.”
“Right, I will get right on that.”
She spun around and eyed all of the sharp corners and exposed outlets. “You will also need to baby proof this place.”
He frowned, “should I be writing this down?”
“You tell me.”
The entire reason she moved into this house was to help Alex get to know his nephew. She was going to take this seriously. Kier deserved to be taken care of by people who knew what they were doing.
Nodding affirmatively, Alex pulled his phone out of the pocket of the jeans he had changed into while he’d been waiting for her to arrive. Unlocking his phone and opening up the notes app, he waited for her to continue as he looked up at her expectantly.
“You need to take this seriously, Alex.”
“Oh, trust me I am.”
Kier grabbed the front of India’s dress and pressed the top of his head to her cheek as he watched the two of them interact. Alex had only ever seen the boy as he slept. So seeing him now seemed like a whole new experience. He was very alert. Like he wanted and could see everything.
Stepping closer, he gazed across at his nephew. “Can I hold him?”
India looked like she wanted to reject the request, but eventually she nodded. She was protective of him. She still saw Alex as a threat. If he had any hope of winning her back, he had to show her they were on the same side.
He gently took the boy from her and held him close. “He’s cute.”
“I know,” she said softly as she looked at Kier with a look he used to be intimately familiar with.
It was pure love.
She used to look at him with something very similar to that. Whenever they were together, he could bring that out of her. He would need that skill again to get India back into his life. She had to let her guard down around him.
“I’m not going to hurt him, Dia.”
“I know.”
“Do you? Cause your face has a lot of doubt.”
“I won’t be able to just trust you with him overnight. It is going to take time.”
“That is one of the reasons I invited you to live here. So you can know you are leaving him in a good place.”
“I would rather not be leaving him at all.”
“I know that too.”
Smiling weakly when Kier reached out and touched her face, she kissed the palm of his hand. “Can you just show me where I will sleep and help me unpack my car?”
****
It had been a week since she moved into the Ivy. She had to admit, it wasn’t as miserable as she thought it would be. Emilia didn’t say much, but she was good with Kier and was an amazing cook. Alex spent most mornings locked away in his office, making calls and typing away at his computer. In the afternoon, he would come out for air and spend time with them.
It was weird seeing him interact with a child. When they were younger, she had no idea what kind of dad he would be. He never seemed to think about it. Never brought it up. Whenever she did bring it up, he would just nod and listen. For a long time, she thought he just didn’t want kids. He just wanted to avoid a fight by not saying anything.
Alex wasn’t the warm and fuzzy type. He didn’t really like talking about thoughts and emotions. She remembered him having a lot of trouble expressing how he felt the first time he told her he loved her. There was a lot of fumbling and he’d gone off on a tangent or two. India had the ability to knock all of the “cool” out of him.
“You really like spending your entire day taking care of him.”
“He’s my baby.”
“You really never need a break?”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m human. Of course, I’ve needed breaks and will continue to need breaks. I just know that at the end of it, I always want to come back to him.”
When she said that last part, her voice cracked a little. Soon she wouldn’t be able to come back to him. She wouldn’t be able to see him whenever she wanted. Once again, India was losing someone she loved to something beyond her control.
“Dia,” Alex touched her knee.
They were sitting on a blanket in the middle of his living room with baby toys scattered all around them. Kier was happily crawling around, touching one thing after another.
She shifted away and cleared her throat. He was not the person she wanted to be vulnerable with. He wasn’t the person she could be vulnerable with. He would exploit the vulnerability to get what he wanted and she had already lost enough to him.
“Shouldn’t you be focused on getting to know your nephew?”
“I wish I didn’t have to hurt you like this.”
“I wish you had never found Kier. We don’t all get what we want.”
Sitting up, Alex looked into her eyes. “It’s not like you will never see him. He will be living in the same town as you.”
“Right like your mother would ever let me visit.”
“My mother isn’t his guardian.”
“You are barely ever in town.”
“I never had a reason to come to town.”
“Now, you do?”
“Now, I have my nephew to raise and an old friend I didn’t know I missed.”
She rolled her eyes and sat back. This new and older Alex may not be as tongue-tied the one she loved, but he still was not great at hiding his intentions when it came to her.
“We are not doing this,” she warned.
“Doing what?”
“Exactly what you’ve been angling for since I walked into those doors. Did you really think I wouldn’t figure out your game?”
“What game would that be?”
She tilted her head to the side and stared back at him in wonder. “Why do you seem to think getting me into bed is a good idea?”
“Maybe I don’t want to get you into bed?”
She snorted, “right. That’s why you’ve been paying extra attention to me and using every excuse to touch me.”
“Maybe what I want is more than sex.”
Confused, she said nothing. He couldn’t do this to her now. It had been too long. She had been through too much.
Alex reached out and gently touched her cheek. “Do you even remember the reason things ended between us?”
“You were an asshole?”
“Probably. But I was an asshole the entire time we were together. What specifically broke us up, do you remember what it was?”
She shook her head.