“Right here,” she said.
“To think they were this close…”
Light blurred Rea’s face so he couldn’t make out her expression. But her breaths were ragged.
“I can finally go now,” she said.
“Go where?” he asked, still sleepy.
“Anywhere.”
Rea
She’d thought that through. And at the end, she’d decided to do it. “Can I tell you my last wish?” she asked the general.
He sat beside her staring out the window at the glowing blossoms. His hair was still tousled from the night’s lovemaking, his eyes still hazed with lust, his shoulders relaxed in a way she’d never seen before.
Since last night, her bones had become light with joy. Her entire being seemed to drift on a cloud of post-coupling contentment. Being with the general brought her so much happiness. It seemed too much for her body to hold.
“I’d love to hear it,” he said. “But can I admit something to you before that?”
“Did last night make you certain of ‘love’?”
“More than certain. It made be a believer.” Stealthily, he laced his fingers between hers. “So much so that I want to marry you.”
“But that’s…”
“We’ve known each other for years, Rea. Though you may have hated me at first, every moment I spent with you brought me only peace and joy. Every time I met you during those summers and springs, it soothed my soul, gave me the hope to endure one more day.” He paused. “I’ve become tired of war. I’ve become tired of fighting. Let me rest in your arms now. Let me be at peace forever.”
“Can you afford to marry me?” she said, fears playing in her mind. That was too much happiness. Too much perfection. “The Alisians hate the Suveri. Won’t your father…won’t someone object?”
Sebestyén nodded. “I don’t want to lie to you or keep things from you, so I’ll tell you the truth. If you choose to stay with me forever, it wouldn’t be with me as an emperor. Before I left, my father threatened to toss me out on my ear if I don’t marry the woman he chose for me within the fortnight.”
“Do you wish to give up the throne?”
“Right now, all I wish for is you.”
“Then I refuse.”
“What do you want from me, Rea?” he asked in a defeated voice.
“Don’t insult me, general. I don’t want anything from you. I just want to give you everything. My body, my heart, my soul, my art. And your dreams. I want you to have it all.”
“But I can’t have it all,” he said. “I must choose. Between you and Zsófia. Between peace and ambition. Between love and emptiness. And I believe I’ve made my choice.”
“You don’t have to choose.” Energy infused her blood. She loved him, and it gave her the strength to make a tough choice. “There is a way you can have it all. A way we can be together, forever, and you can have the throne, too.”
“I will not have you as my mistress,” he said vehemently. “No matter what you think, seeing me with a wife, seeing her walk beside me when it should be you…it’ll only make you miserable.”
“I wasn’t suggesting that.” Rea retrieved the glowing blossoms dye from the container she’d poured it into. “I was suggesting the Heaven’s Eye.”
“Immortality? How will that solve anything?”
“I wasn’t completely honest with you when I told you how my father died. He died making the Heaven’s Eye for General Basa. You see, the Heaven’s Eye requires the ultimate sacrifice from the artist—death.”
“That’s…” The general’s face was pale, as if he’d encountered death itself. “I won’t let you perish for the sake of a tattoo.”
“I won’t die…not in the traditional sense, at least. After I make the tattoo, I’ll become an inseparable part of you. I’ll always protect you.” Rea embraced him. “And even if your heart stops someday, you won’t die because mine will continue to beat for you. It’s the ultimate bond, the ultimate love. An eternity of being together.”
“You can’t ask me to seriously consider such a daft idea.” The general’s arms were crushing her, wrapping her tightly in a hug.
“It isn’t a daft idea. It’s your only option. No matter what you feel, you aren’t suited to a life of hard labor or thievery. Being the emperor is your purpose. Without it, you’ll only become empty and resentful in time. It’ll reach the point where not even love will be enough. Not even I will be enough for you.”
“You cannot think so little of me. I will not abandon you, not ever. I love you.”
“Love is a wonderful thing, general,” said Rea. “But it is not the only thing a person needs. We require our passions, our art, our purpose. Without those things, our lives remain unfulfilled, no matter how much love we have.”
It was her art, her tattoos that had allowed her to endure the never-ending winter days when the general hadn’t been present to make things better for her. It was her desire for revenge that had propelled her through the never-ending weeks of hopelessness after her father’s death. The general, too, needed his politics, his passion.
“I loved my father,” she continued. “But even so, his absence didn’t shatter me. The absence of love didn’t kill me. If there is one path you must choose, choose your art.”
“I cannot leave you behind. I won’t.” His hug tightened.
“Then allow me to ink the Heaven’s Eye.”
“Absolutely not. I need you alive, Rea. Stay as my mistress, if you must, but not as a dead tattoo on my body.”
“A tattoo is not a dead thing, general. It’s art, infused with love and feelings. That’s why, when you look at it, it’ll stir your heart, too.”
“I won’t accept this.”
“Then I’ll make it my last desire. Grant me my last wish. Allow me to draw the Heaven’s Eye on you.”
It didn’t hurt. It didn’t hurt because she always knew she would choose that path. It didn’t hurt, because it really was her last wish, her last desire, and it came from that beautiful place in her soul where only happy things dwelt.
“I can’t grant that wish,” Sebestyén said. “Marry me, Rea. We’ll be happy. I can convince my father to accept you in time. It’ll likely take years, and I’ll never get the throne back, but I’ll be able to change the country in my own way. We can help the Suveri ourselves, like we helped that little girl.”
“I wish to see you as the emperor,” she said. “It’s what you deserve. And if you can’t be emperor, then I won’t marry you.”
“All right.” Sebestyén ran a hand through his hair. “I’ll be emperor. And I’ll marry you. Somehow, I’ll do both those things. I’ll convince my father. So, don’t give up on your life so easily. Not for me, not for anyone else. You need to live a long life and draw a lot of tattoos. You can’t disappear.”
She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe it was possible. But it wasn’t. A Suveri empress…even the notion was preposterous. Even if the emperor accepted it, the kingdom wouldn’t.