Not that he figured Alessio wanted to hear that right now.
“We’re going to talk now, right?” Alessio asked. “Talk, Corrado, which is something we probably should have done, oh, what ... about a month ago, or so?”
He straightened a bit, stuffing his hands into his pockets at the same time. “I—”
“No, no, no,” the other man murmured quickly, stepping down from the desk in one fluid movement, like his entire body was made of water, and he moved like it, too. “No, I don’t want to hear you talk, unless you’re going to say something I want to hear.”
Corrado eyed that knife in Alessio’s hand. “You going to put that away, or ...?”
That was a low blow.
Even Corrado knew it.
Alessio’s jaw twitched, and he flipped the blade around in his palm without even looking at the weapon. “Fuck you. Like I would ever—”
“I didn’t say you would. I asked if you were going to put it away.”
Without a word, Alessio snapped the switchblade closed, and pocketed the weapon. He didn’t acknowledge he did it other than to raise his brow at Corrado like he was saying, better?
“I made a trip to New York, yeah,” Alessio said, taking one step closer to Corrado, but coming no further than that, “worried about you—because that’s what I fucking do, Corrado. I worry about you. I think about you.”
He sucked in a heavy breath but kept quiet. It wasn’t like he needed to be told to shut his fucking mouth right now. He could tell what Alessio wanted, which was to get shit off his chest, and then maybe he’d be willing to let Corrado talk.
But who knew for sure?
“And what do you do, huh?” Alessio asked.
“I fucked up.”
“Right.” Alessio glanced away, staring out the one bay window in the office that currently overlooked a darkening sky and a city that was still awake. “Do you wanna know why I picked this room?”
“Because you always liked it.”
“Not even close.”
“Then, why?”
“Because there’s only one goddamn room in this penthouse that you’ll sleep in, and if you’re fucking her, that’s where you’re doing it, Corrado.”
He didn’t reply.
Alessio’s gaze cut back to him fast. “You won’t even deny it, then?”
“Would you believe me if I did?”
“What—”
“I haven’t slept with her,” Corrado interjected fast. That, he wanted clear. “Yeah, I crossed a line. Yeah, I broke those fucking rules. And yeah, I got too close, and I didn’t let you know from the start like I should have, but I didn’t fuck her.”
Alessio made a noise under his breath.
Dark.
And oh, so painful.
It cut Corrado deep. That one sound could have been a knife driving into his chest because he felt that. He felt that betrayal swimming in Alessio’s mind, and heart. Felt it like nothing else, but it was done now.
He couldn’t change it now.
“But you want to,” Alessio said. “You’ve wanted to.”
“Les—”
“Fuck you, don’t give me bullshit, Corrado. Not right now. You give me the truth you should have given me a month ago, or you say nothing.”
If one was unlucky enough to see a snake right before it struck, they would know the serpent liked to coil its body tightly, saving all its energy, and letting the power of its muscles do the work before it attacked. And that was Alessio in that moment—coiled, prepping, almost ready to come at him, and barely holding back.
“Why not?” Alessio asked, his head turned just a bit so he could watch Corrado from the side. “You wanted to fuck her—still do, I bet—so why not do it? Just do it, right?”
He wanted to speak.
Wanted to tell Alessio exactly why.
His throat tightened, though, making the words hard to get out. To his companion, it only made it seem like Corrado was holding back, something that had always hit a raw nerve with Alessio when it came to them.
“Why the fuck not, huh?” Alessio demanded, blue eyes blazing. “Because the rest didn’t matter—you didn’t care to tell me anything else, so why not just do it.”
“Because I couldn’t.”
“That’s a coward’s answer.”
“It’s the truth,” Corrado murmured, “and I know I should have told you, but it wasn’t that simple, Les. I fucked up, yes, but it wasn’t as easy as you’re thinking. I didn’t purposely decide to do this, or do it to you, okay, I—”
In a blink, Alessio closed the distance between them. Another person, no doubt, would have backed up at the sight of Alessio coming at them looking like he did right then. Dressed in black, leather and combat boots, his expression darkened from his rage.
But not Corrado.
No.
He stayed right where he was, letting Alessio get as close as he fucking could, until their chests touched, and they were eye-to-eye. Stormy blue irises could have nailed him to the floor, but he still wouldn’t have moved.
“No?” Alessio asked, leaning in closer until their mouths were a breath apart. “No, Corrado? You didn’t purposely do this, huh? You didn’t purposely decide not to tell me that you were watching a woman, that you had something going on here I should have known about because that had always been our way? You really wanna say you didn’t do that knowing what you were doing?”
Alessio pointed a finger at him, but didn’t touch Corrado with it, and lost all his sense of decorum at the same goddamn time. His next words came loud, and sharp, because he clearly wanted Corrado to hear and feel every single one of them.
“I knew shit was up, and I went looking for it, Corrado. And I’m so fucking glad I found it before you could tell me, right, because I don’t think you would have.”
“I was going to tell you.”
“When, tonight? A little late, yeah?”
Corrado shook his head as Alessio took a step back. “If you’d just let me talk—”
“I’m sick of hearing you talk,” Alessio returned, “because you don’t say anything new, and you certainly don’t tell me what I want to hear anymore. You’ve been saying the same shit to me for the last five years, so why would this be any different?”
“Stop it,” Corrado said lowly, his fists clenching at his sides. “It’s one thing to be pissed about this, but it’s another to act like this has been something that’s happened time and time again. Because it’s not. It’s not, Les. And I didn’t mean for it to happen this time. She wasn’t supposed to be anything. She was just a fucking job!”
“A job, right. That’s fucking rich.” Alessio let out a laugh, bitter and aching, and moved closer to Corrado again. This time, Alessio coming forward forced him back a bit until his side hit the edge of the opened door and made the crack wider so that both of them were almost standing in the doorway. “If you had wanted to fuck her, all you had to do was tell me. It’s the one and only thing I’ve always asked from this, but you couldn’t even give me that. I shouldn’t be surprised.”
“And what in the hell does that mean?”