The road takes us to Blackpool, where we find a bed and breakfast that’s cheap and near the seafront. “Did you speak with Riggs?” she asks.
“I told you, I can’t go back there,” I mutter, taking a seat on the balcony of our room and looking out at the busy beach.
“But if we go together and that Cree guy sees you’ve moved on, why would he care that you’re back?”
“He just will. I don’t wanna talk about it,” I snap. I never do. Raven’s desperate for a home, and I’d love to give her that security because she deserves it, but I can’t go back to the club. If I see Leia again, who knows how I’ll react. I miss her so bad, it’s a physical pain.
Raven and I aren’t a thing but things have progressed. We both enjoy sex but neither of us want a relationship, and she knows how I feel about Leia, so Cree will smell a rat. He isn’t stupid.
She sighs. “We can’t spend the rest of our lives moving around like this.”
“I have a place,” I admit. “It’s in London, but not at the club. Maybe we can go there eventually, but for now, let’s keep moving. Once Riggs gives me the all clear, we can head back there.”
“Can we at least go to the beach and enjoy what Blackpool has to offer?” she asks hopefully. I don’t have the heart to tell her no, so I find myself nodding. Raven confided in me not long after we left the club. She grew up in the care of an aunt and uncle. She doesn’t believe they were actually related at all, but her father told her they were, right before handing her over. Turns out they didn’t have a nurturing bone in their bodies and Raven had a shit life until she ran away at age fourteen. Since then, she’d lived on the streets until one of the guys from the club found her a few months back.
So when she asks me to do stuff like take her to the funfair, I can’t say no. She missed all that as a kid and as she wanders around in awe, popping cotton candy into her mouth, I find myself smiling. It feels good to make her happy. And then I think of Leia, like I always do. She must come into my head a thousand times a day. Even Raven’s joy can’t stop the pain of missing Leia and the club.
We spend three days in Blackpool, just because Raven loves it so much, before we leave and head down to Southport. It’s another seaside town where we’re less likely to draw attention to ourselves. It’s late when we finally find a hotel, and Raven is in the shower when my cell rings. It’s Cree. I haven’t spoken to him since I left.
“Yeah?” I don’t feel like I can refer to him as my brother anymore even though I sound blunt.
“Riggs is talking about calling you to ask you to come back here,” he mutters, not sounding at all happy about it. “He wants you home.”
“And how do you feel about that?” I ask. I knew Riggs would try harder to get me back home. We’re close and he’s pissed I just left without speaking to him about it.
“You know how I feel about that, Chains. I don’t want you anywhere near this fuckin’ place and I don’t want you near Leia. I almost told him tonight,” he admits.
“Yeah?” I’m not surprised. In fact, I expected him to have told him already, so the fact he hasn’t surprises me more. “So why didn’t you?”
“Fuck knows. You betrayed him and you deserve to suffer, but . . . ” He trails off. Cree hates talking feelings, even though he’s much better at it since meeting Eva. “It’s weird not having you around.”
“You can say it, brother, if you want me home cos you miss me,” I say with a smirk.
“Don’t push it,” he says, but I hear the smile in his voice. “I don’t know what the answer is, Chains. Leia’s talking about moving out. Maybe if she does, it could work.”
“She’s moving out?” I repeat. “Where to?”
“I can’t talk about her with you, man,” Cree says and sighs. “It ain’t right. I just wanted to pass on Riggs’ message. You were right about Cobra—he’s not fit to be president. We gotta dispose and dismantle that place.”
“Maybe we aren’t watching our other charters close enough. We need to think about regular drop-ins. Maybe that’s what I could do. Keeps me out of trouble when I’m on the road.”
“Riggs said you’d dumped Dolly and found a new chick?”
“Dolly didn’t work out. She liked the white powder more than me. Hard to believe, I know,” I joke. “Raven’s travelling around with me,” I add as she comes into the room wrapped in a towel.
“Is it serious?” he asks.
“It could be,” I say, because if I can never have Leia, then surely Raven is the next best thing. We get on. She’s easy-going and not into games. I can see it working if I could just get Leia outta my head.
“I’m happy for you, brother. Riggs is taking out the target tonight. You’ll be safe to settle somewhere.”
“Good to know,” I say. “See you round.”
I disconnect the call as Raven drops her towel and crawls over the bed to me. “Who was that?” she asks, making a grab for my belt and pulling it open.
“Cree,” I say and she looks up surprised.
“I thought he hated you?”
“He does. He misses me though. I’m a lovable rogue.”
Raven smiles as she releases my cock. “You men are so weird. He hates you but he misses you? Makes no sense at all.” I don’t bother to answer because she sucks my cock into her mouth and makes me forget my words.
I get two hours of sleep. Raven woke me throughout the night to fuck. I’m not complaining, but jeez, the woman is insatiable. I slap her naked ass and she wakes. “It’s too early,” she groans.
“You should have got more sleep,” I say. “You coming to London or what?”
She sits up and smiles widely. She’s always wanted to go to London. “To your place?” she asks and I nod. It’s a two-story house in Peckham which isn’t too far from the clubhouse but far enough for me to avoid anyone there.
Chapter Ten
Leia
I glance nervously at Gia and she gives me a reassuring nod. Eva and Anna are waiting for me to speak, but the words just won’t come. Gia arranged this meal tonight so I could talk to them about the pregnancy. It’s been four weeks since I discovered it and Gia thinks I’m in denial because I haven’t told anyone. Apart from Mum guessing, no one else knows, and after speaking to her that morning, I’ve avoided the topic.
The waiter tops up Gia’s and Eva’s glasses. He holds it in my direction and I pick up my glass and hold it out for him. “Leia,” hisses Gia and I roll my eyes, slamming the glass back down.
“It can’t be that bad. Just tell us,” pleads Anna.
“I don’t want Riggs or any of the guys to know,” I begin and they both nod. The girls are good at keeping secrets. “Gia did a pregnancy test,” I say and they both smile at Gia. “It was negative,” I add and they frown.
“All five tests were, and the four I’ve done since then,” says Gia helpfully.
“I’m so confused,” groans Anna.