“Me too! You should add chocolate chips,” she informs him, like that’s a secret recipe.
“Good idea. Think you can help me?” I love how good he is with her already. It helps that Rae is talking to him so easily.
“Yes!” She grabs his hand and starts pulling him from the room. He lets her, but not before he reaches out and snags my hand to come with them.
He asks Rae about her Christmas, and she launches into telling him all the things she got as we make our way downstairs to the kitchen.
As we walk past the long mirror in the hall, my whole body warms at the sight of the three of us looking like a picture-perfect family. It has me wanting to spend the day like this and once again avoid reality for a little bit longer.
I didn’t think the hole I dug could get any deeper…
Chapter 8
Isaac
The whole day has been perfect. Rae and I made a huge pancake breakfast for everyone, then she took me on a walk through the gardens to show me her play area, complete with a tree house. We sat up there for hours, and she read me books and we pretended to be pirates while Jillian was the damsel in distress.
We ended up taking a drive to see Christmas lights around town, and then the three of us finished the night at a nearby restaurant with outdoor heaters and hot cocoa.
My face hurts from smiling, and my abs actually ache from all the laughing I’ve done. I’ve got years to make up for not doing either of those, and I have a feeling I’m going to be doing a lot more of it.
Today I was able to sneak a few moments with Jillian when I could put my lips on her. I didn’t realize how hard it would be not to kiss her until I had to restrain myself. Although I want to eventually be able to show her affection in front of Rae, we’re taking it slow, at least for today.
“For you,” I say to Rae, handing her the little box.
“Me?” She looks up at me with wide eyes as she sets down her hot cocoa and tears it open.
“Isaac.” Jillian’s voice is soft as she takes my hand.
I shrug. “I saw it in a shop this morning, and I couldn’t resist.”
Maybe it’s because I have this undeniable soul connection with Jillian, but when I look at Rae, my heart calls to her. Maybe it’s due to part of my blood because of my brother, but no matter the reason, I want her to know she’s important to me. It doesn’t matter that she’s not mine; she’ll be mine from now on. Jillian is it for me, and this is our family. Forever.
“Oh my gosh, Mommy, look!” She holds up the charm bracelet with the single heart-shaped charm and smiles.
“It’s a blue topaz,” I tell her as I help her fasten it around her wrist. “It’s the stone for December, which is the month that we met.” I turn the heart over for her to see the little silver disc with the inscription. “And this is the date we met.” I hold her hand and look into her eyes. “Because I want the both of us to remember it forever.”
Without warning, Rae launches herself into my arms, and I catch her with both hands. I hold her to me as she fits perfectly in the space of my chest with her head tucked against my neck. Something inside of me warms at the unbridled affection, and tears sting my eyes. I’ve never wanted anything more in my life than for this little girl to belong to me. My piece of shit brother walked out on her, and I’ll spend my life letting her know that I’m never going anywhere.
When she releases her hold, she goes back to her seat and drinks her hot chocolate as she talks about showing everyone her gift as soon as we get home. I glance over to see Jillian wiping away tears, and I squeeze her leg.
We talk about plans for New Year’s Eve and what they do for the ball drop. Rae tells me all about staying up late, which is her favorite, and then watching the fireworks they shoot off in her backyard.
It’s late by the time we get back home, and Rae has fallen asleep in the backseat. When the car stops, I unbuckle her and then scoop up her limp body in my arms. She’s so tiny like this, and I can’t describe the feeling of holding her in my arms. I have this natural instinct to protect her and keep her safe like it’s in my DNA.
“You got her?” Jillian asks, and I nod.
“Yeah, I’ll carry her to bed.”
It’s snowed a little more since we’ve been out, and the fresh powder covers the outside steps. As I lift her in my arms a little higher, I notice that there are already boot prints leading to the house.
“Did your brother leave?” I ask, looking back for his car.
“No, he said they’d be home all day. Why?” Jillian notices the recent prints the same time I do and glances up at the house.
Just as I follow her line of sight, someone steps out from the shadows. It’s so dark at the top of the steps, and the light is behind the figure. It takes me a second to understand what’s happening, but when I see Jillian’s body react, I know exactly who it is.
“Well, look who it is,” Paul sneers at the three of us as he slowly descends the steps.
I hold Rae tighter against me, reaching my other hand out to grab Jillian’s upper arm. I try to pull her behind me, but she’s frozen in place.
“Jillian.” I say her name and tug on her arm before she blinks and then comes to my side.
“Isn’t it lovely seeing the whole family together,” he drawls, taking another step closer. “I see you told him.” Paul steps farther down, and the light illuminates his face. He’s lost so much weight since the last time I saw him, and his eyes are sunken into his skull. He looks like death, and when he smiles, I can see some of his teeth have begun to rot.
“No,” Jillian says, barely above a whisper.
I look at him in question before his smile grows wider. “She didn’t tell you that you’re the father?”
Chapter 9
Jillian
Isaac stands there for a moment with no expression on his face, but after a moment he turns to me. “I should put her down,” he finally says, and I nod.
My heart is about to come out of my chest. Why the hell is Paul here, and why now after all this time? I swallow the lump that has formed in my throat. I’m relieved Rae is asleep and not witnessing this mess, because I have no doubt it would not have mattered to Paul if she heard what he said. Paul didn't care who he hurt, and in his world children don't get a pass. I didn’t know how cruel he could be until I became his wife.
We have no choice but to walk up the steps, and I’m surprised how Isaac remains completely calm.
“You can wait outside,” he tells his brother when we get to the top while I put the code into the door and unlock it.
“Don’t be a dick.” Paul lets himself right in, and Isaac’s nose flares. I know he wants to say something or more likely do something. From the look in his eyes, holding Rae is the only thing keeping it from happening.
“I’m warning you.” His voice is so low, and the tone is so cold it sends chills up my spine. I didn't know someone’s voice could sound so deadly. He really must be pissed, and I’m sure some of that anger is for me too. “Come with me, Jillian.”