"You, um, was it a long relationship?" I bite my lip. Why am I asking him so many personal questions when he clearly isn't into sharing or affection?
"Forgive Iris. She's gonna be a shrink," Walker says.
"Oh. Yeah?" Ryan raises a brow interesting. "What's that like?"
"Actually, I'm going to be a research psychologist. I'm not studying clinical psychology. You know, therapy?"
He nods. He knows. "I tried that once."
Dean's eyes go wide. "You did?"
"Yeah. Thought it might help. With forgetting Penny." He takes another sip. "But it was bullshit. Didn't go back. No offense."
"It's not for everyone." I press my lips together. "Sometimes, it takes a while to find the right person. Or get comfortable. Especially if you aren't used to sharing. Not that you're—"
"No. He is. He gets it." Dean laughs. "Good thing for you Walker has a babe on his arm. You could get free help."
"You could kiss my ass," Ryan says.
Dean laughs. "A hundred bucks says you won't drop your pants."
"You're disgusting," Leighton says.
"Like you don't want to see Ryan naked." Dean shakes his head.
Her cheeks flush. "I… shut up." The blush spreads down her chest.
And she keeps looking at Ryan.
She likes him.
Maybe. I think. I'm not great at seeing the line between I like you as a friend and I want your body and I want you to be mine forever.
Dean pulls his t-shirt up his stomach. Pats his perfect six-pack. "You can look as much as you want, baby."
"Which is zero." She shakes her head. "What's with your aversion to clothes?"
"They hide my beauty." He shrugs, effortlessly coy.
Ryan looks to me. "That's a good thing you're doing. More important than this shit." He motions to the shop.
"Tattoos are therapeutic in their own way." My fingers go to the words on my forearm. "You're also doing a good thing."
"Nah, mostly he does himself as he cries into pictures of Penny," Dean teases.
Ryan shakes his head stupid kids. "Good luck with shit." He nods a round of goodbyes then turns and leaves.
I wait until he's out of earshot. "Is he always like that?"
"No." Leighton presses her plum lips together. "He's usually a lot less friendly."
"Yeah. He's practically beaming." Walker leans in to press his lips to my neck. "I'm gonna talk to him."
"Go." I lean into his touch.
He wraps his arms around me. Pulls me into a tight hug.
His lips brush mine. Soft to start. Then harder. Then he's sucking on my bottom lip, groaning into my mouth.
Every thought in my head dissolves. My eyelids flutter together. My world goes white. It's only Walker. His lips, his hands, his smile.
I really, really like him.
Want him to be my boyfriend like him.
Want him to be my boyfriend for a long, long time and maybe forever like him.
It's… Uh…
I pull back with a sigh.
His lips press into that perfect smile. He shoots Dean a playful look. "Don't entertain her too much."
"I can't help it."
Walker laughs. "Uh-huh." He turns and heads over to Ryan. He's sitting on a bench in front with Emma, Brendon, and Kaylee.
Look at me, learning names.
Woohoo.
"You like him, huh?" Dean asks.
"Oh my God. Leave her alone." Leighton presses her palms against the counter. She plops onto it and taps her heeled ankle boots together.
God, she really is cool. Like a punk rock goddess. She's wearing smooth black skinny jeans and a reconstructed Ramones t-shirt cut up and sewn together with hot pink ribbon.
"It's an innocent question." He leans against the counter next to her. Brings his cup to his lips. "You should be proud of me. I didn't demand Never Have I Ever."
"Uh-huh." She shakes her head you're ridiculous.
"Or truth or dare," he says.
She looks to me. "See what I deal with every day?"
I laugh. "It must be rough."
She does too. "It really is. But I love it here. Serious eye candy."
Dean motions aww, you shouldn't have with mock humility.
It's clear she isn't trying to pay Dean a compliment, but he is super, duper, amazingly hot. Tall. Broad. With shaggy brown hair, piercing blue eyes, and a million-dollar smile.
He looks like trouble. Like the kind of guy who will get wasted with you, fuck you senseless, then leave you with nothing but memories.
"Brendon, Ryan, and Walker are super hot, yes." She ignores him. "But the clients. All the surfer boys and the local musicians get their work done here. And I don't mean local, playing at a dive bar in Burbank. I mean fucking rock stars who live in Venice." She fans herself. "Why am I not having sex again?"
"You make bad choices," Dean says.
"That hurts coming from you." She smiles. "It's true. Turns out tattoos and muscles don't always equate to boyfriend material."
"In my experience, a short haircut and a nice suit don't either," I say.
"Tattooed manwhores aren't your type?" Dean asks.
"Not usually." I press my hands into my sides. It feels weird not holding a drink. "Excuse me." I move to the bar. Grab a cup. Fill it with grapefruit juice.
God, that Belvedere looks so good.
And it isn't opened.
It would be so, so easy to chug a few shots, let my inhibitions down, bring out fun, party girl Iris.
But the chain reaction that starts…
It isn't worth it.
I move back to Dean and Leighton. They're hate-flirting over something.
And Walker is laughing with his friends. Well, Ryan isn't exactly laughing. But he looks slightly less miserable.
"You're really into him, huh?" Dean asks.
"Seriously, Dean?" Leighton shoots him a really look.
"I don't sleep with people I don't like," I say.
She laughs. "Foreign concept. You'll have to explain it to him."
"Nah. It's more than that level of like." Dean's eyes meet mine. "You're looking at him the way Brendon looks at Kay."
"Like she wants to drag him to the back room, pin him to the wall, and rip his clothes off?" Leighton takes a long sip. "Who doesn't? I'm not into your boyfriend, Iris, but he is fine."
"He's not my boyfriend." The words are quick. An impulse. But they don't feel as true as they should. "We're just having fun."
She nods even though it's clear she doesn't believe me.
"I hope that's true." Dean taps his glass with his pointer finger. "'Cause I don't want to see him turning into some more annoying version of Ryan."
"He won't." Though, given Walker's reaction to everything about his sister, it seems like he'll be miserable and evasive if this ends in flames. Which isn't exactly Ryan, but it's not far off either. "Relationships don't always end like that."
"Mostly," he says.