Vivi glanced up at Finn’s face, and her expression softened. “Have to start somewhere, right? More importantly, you look hot as hell.”
That did ease the disappointment, but a loud crash from the back room kept Finn from saying anything back.
“I’m all right!” Will yelled from the past the curtain.
Oliver looked uncertain. “Should I go check?”
Vivi scrunched up her nose and nodded.
“I’ll be right back.” He ducked through the curtain.
When he reappeared minutes later with a to-go cup, Nora reemerged as well. She had her arms crossed, but her looming seemed friendlier than before.
Vivi gave Finn her keys as they left.
“You sure?”
“Completely,” Vivi said with a satisfied grin.
Finn had to move Vivi’s seat back so her knees weren’t almost in the steering wheel. Vivi closed her eyes and rested in the passenger seat while Finn drove them back to the apartment, Latin pop playing on the stereo. There were far worse things than driving her girlfriend home, both of them dressed up fancy, and being all mannered as she let Vivi in the front door.
All Vivi could manage for lunch was more oatmeal. She walked Finn through how to make it, since she was fading fast. She tolerated some almond butter mixed into it and she drank plenty of water, so Finn thought they’d done pretty well. Vivi settled on the couch and Finn sat on the coffee table so she could keep looking at the girl. Her girl.
“I forgot,” Vivi groaned. “I got you something. Where’s my purse?”
Finn got it for her. Making Vivi laugh, bringing her tissues, and retrieving her purse sounded like a fine life to Finn. Vivi rummaged in the purse and pulled out a small brown paper envelope. She handed it to Finn with a flourish. Finn fished around in it and pulled out a hard metal shape.
A key.
Finn wasn’t moving in, not yet. Not until she could pay her own way and hopefully then some, and had squared things with Hollis and Ilsa too. Rather than arguing, however, she took Vivi’s hand and kissed it.
She could do that now, any time they wanted.
Vivi yawned, and tried to apologize while she yawned, but it was a huge yawn.
Finn laughed. “Do you need an afternoon nap?”
“No, I’m fine! I should tell you this.” Vivi yawned again. “I had a video chat in my car with Vicente when I got done with training a bit early. I can’t get him to say what he would prefer me to do, he keeps saying it’s my choice. He did admit it’s hard thinking about not raising his first child himself, especially with me not being Latina, and my Spanish isn’t where it should be even for work. I’m terrible at languages.”
Finn took a minute to sit with that, and judging by Vivi’s serious expression, Vivi was doing the same. It would be a loss for Vicente nobody could ever fix. Plus, if Vivi went forward with it, she’d be raising a little biracial person without Vicente being there day in and day out to help the kid figure out how to deal with racist bullshit.
“You’d have to up your game, wouldn’t you?” Finn stroked Vivi’s fingers with her thumb. “I’m assuming your stepmom would be around a lot, but it’s not the same.”
Vivi nodded. “Also not the same, but Austin ISD has Spanish-English dual-language immersion starting in kindergarten. I looked it up and Vicente seemed happier to know that. Happier when I said it might be us, actually. Both of us queer, I mean.”
Their eyes met. Finn smiled encouragingly. She might not know the future, but she knew right now, and right now us was one of the best words.
Vivi sighed. “He did say he’d sign whatever I needed for custody, if that’s what I want. He’d want to visit periodically, so hopefully they wouldn’t fuck him over at the border. Maybe have the child visit, too, when they’re old enough, so they’d know where they come from.”
Finn curled her hand more securely around Vivi’s. She didn’t want to jump to conclusions. She didn’t have a conclusion she wanted to jump to. All she wanted was for Vivi to be able to make a decision and get out from under the stress.
“I called Planned Parenthood,” Vivi said. “I didn’t know what I’d say until they answered. I ended up asking if they needed volunteer nurses. Because... they would have been there for me. If an abortion was the right choice for me right now. It’s not. So I want to help them be there for someone else instead.”
Finn was twenty-five years old. She’d gotten one interview, so she could get another, and then another, as many as it took. Vivi was twenty-eight and had a job, an apartment, and a car. A whole lot of people made it through with a whole lot less. They could figure it out.
However, she suspected Vivi’s stepmom was going to flip out that her youngest stepdaughter was pregnant, unmarried, and dating an ex-con. And her dad, ugh, who knew what would happen there? Finn wondered how long before Vivi realized.
“What did the clinic say about volunteering?”
“They said yes, absolutely! I can do it for as long as I have... free time.”
She was starting to sound shaky. Finn switched seats from the coffee table to the couch and drew Vivi under her arm. They fit together, Vivi’s head on her shoulder, their clasped hands resting on Finn’s leg.
“I bet they might need other kinds of help too,” Finn suggested, “maybe during the same hours they need nurses. I could go with you, and I bet there are also ways for us to upgrade our Spanish. If we do it together we’d have somebody to practice with.”
“That would be good,” Vivi said. “Especially the Spanish. For... later.”
Finn didn’t blame Vivi for still being skittish about saying it directly. She’d gone through a lot to get to this point. “I do have one suggestion now that you’ve decided. Maybe tell Nora first?”
Vivi sighed against Finn’s chest. “You’re right. She wouldn’t show it, but she’d be destroyed if I told Alicia first.” Finn felt her tense up. “Oh fuck. You haven’t even met Alicia yet. Or my stepmom. The due date is in June and we’re not married. She’s going to kill me!”
Yep, there it was.
Vivi struggled upright and stared at Finn, eyes pleading. “Can we say we’re engaged? Please, Finn. If I tell her we’re engaged, she can focus on that instead of the other thing. Nora and Will did theirs at the courthouse, and Alicia and Matt don’t want to get married. If we say she can do a wedding after a long engagement, it’ll distract her!”
That sounded like a one-way ticket to some kind of terrible blowup down the road, and Finn wasn’t going to mess this up. It was going to be tough enough navigating the situation with Vivi’s father. Finn shook her head. “Vee, I love you, but I’m not going to lie to your family.”
Vivi deflated a bit. “Dammit. You’re right. I know you’re right. Surely she’ll be so excited about her first grandchild she won’t care about anything else? I know she’d only flip out because she loves me and wants me to have stability, but it could be a real mess if she does.”
Tomorrow, Finn might also suggest Vivi let Nora help break the news. Not because Vivi couldn’t do it on her own, mind. Finn had to make that perfectly clear or not say it at all. But Vivi needed somebody on her team, and whether or not Nora was perfect at it, she was her baby sister’s defender.