“So, I guess it’s just all about the future now.”
I nod. “And what do you want for it?”
“You.”
I gasp at his honesty, our eyes holding as my heart rate increases.
He reaches forward and places his hand on mine. “I meant what I said earlier, Ruby. I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to realize that I’m serious.”
I nod, unable to speak past the lump in my throat.
“So… chemistry,” he says with a laugh, immediately breaking the suffocating tension that’s filled the room with his confession. He drags his textbook over and flips it open to the page we were working on earlier and grabs a notebook.
“I was thinking...” I stare at him and it’s as if I’m seeing him for the first time with his head shoved in a book like a real student, not a boy who’s too consumed by his own anger to think about anything but the shitty hand life has dealt him. He doesn’t notice my attention and continues to talk about our assignment like he actually cares.
I realize that he probably does and all the bad boy anger and hatred at the world was just his way of coping with the shit that had been thrown at him.
Smiling at him, I crawl up the bed toward him and sit beside him, reaching for his free hand in the process.
He doesn’t say anything about my contact, his words barely falter but I hear the waver in his voice the second he feels my warmth.
Together we complete the assignment before moving on to others we were both given in our other classes.
“Let’s see your schedule then. I can warn you about the teachers.”
He digs it out and passes it over, but before I look at any of his teacher names, I look to see how many classes we actually share. My stomach clenches when I realize that it’s not just chemistry. Today, it seems, was a one-off because we’re going to be spending a lot of time together for the rest of the week. Maybe this truce really was the best thing to do.
“What?” he asks when I don’t say anything for a few seconds.
“N-nothing. We have a lot of classes together,” I admit.
“Oh yeah?” he asks, leaning over and tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. “Looks like I might not graduate after all then.”
“W-why not?” I spin my head to him and find him staring back at me, his eyes full of heat and his bottom lip pulled into his mouth.
“Because I’ll spend more time studying you than what I should be.”
I can’t help but laugh at him despite the deadly serious expression on his face. “Cheesy much?”
“Don’t care. It’s true. You’re so beautiful, little one.”
My cheeks flame red hot at his compliment.
“Ash,” I warn, knowing that if he pushes too hard that I’ll end up throwing caution to the wind and diving in with both feet again.
“You know what I want, Ruby. I’m not going to hide it from you.”
“I-I know but...” I swallow down my nerves and drag my eyes from his hypnotizing ones.
“Don’t hide from me, little one.” His hot fingers find the edge of my jaw and he tips my face back so I have no choice but to look at him. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I think... I’m not ready for this.” I gesture between the two of us.
“I’m not asking you to marry me.” He chuckles and the sound makes all my muscles south of my stomach clench with desire.
“I-I know but... there’s so much I don’t know about you, and you’ve just moved here and—”
He reaches out and as if I weigh no more than a feather, he lifts me from my place beside him and plonks me on his lap so I’m sitting astride his thighs.
His hands slip under my hoodie, but they stop at my waist, holding me in place.
“Ruby,” he sighs, sitting forward until we’re chest to chest. “You’ve seen me at my very lowest, I’d be tempted to say that you know me better than anyone. You witnessed that, you embraced that, and you helped me put the pieces back together. You’re still fucking here. That tells me everything I need to know.”
“That—”
“Hey,” he says softly. “Look at me.”
I drag my eyes back, afraid that if he looks too hard, he might find everything I’m battling to keep down.
“I’m not asking you for anything other than for you to give me a chance.” His thumb caresses my stomach and despite the fabric of my pants in between us, my skin pricks with goose bumps. “Trust me when I tell you that I want you, and only you, Ruby.”
“Ash,” I sigh, feeling myself getting swept away with his words and the honesty in his eyes.
“We can start again. Start fresh. It seems to be my thing right now. I’ll take you out, treat you properly. You don’t even have to give it up again… yet.” He winks at me, although his joke is kinda ruined by the fact I can feel him hard against my thigh. “I don’t care how long you make me wait. I just want this. I just want you.”
His lips graze my jaw and my entire body shudders with pleasure.
“Oh God,” I whimper as he kisses toward my ear.
The heat of his hands, the gentle brush of his lips. They send me spiraling into a place I remember all too well.
“I missed you, little one. I hated it when you left. I’ve never been so alone. I hated that apartment without you. All I could think about was you.” His lips trail down my neck as he keeps talking, telling me all the things that I’ve been desperate to hear but never thought I would.
“You saved me, Ruby. And if you’ll let me, I’ll spend forever trying to pay you back for what you did that week.”
“Ash, I didn’t do it to receive—”
My words are cut off when he licks up the column of my neck.
“I know, but I want you to have everything you deserve. I sure as shit know that I’m not it, but I’m a selfish fuck who’s not going to let you go, Ruby.”
“You deserve everything.” My hands brush his arms until I thread my fingers into his hair and tug, successfully pulling his face from the crook of my neck. “Everything, Ash,” I repeat to ensure he heard me.
His eyes shutter as he takes in my words and his head shakes slightly, but I tighten my grip on his hair and stop him from refusing to accept my words.
“Fresh start, yeah?” I ask, bumping the tip of my nose against his.
This time, he nods. “Okay, yeah. Fresh start.”
Closing the space between us, I press my lips to his. We don’t move for the longest time, just holding on to each other, but after a while, my need for more gets too much and my lips part, my tongue seeking entry into his mouth.
“Ruby,” he groans, accepting my kiss and tangling his tongue with mine. “Fuck, I missed you.”
In seconds, my back is pressed against his bed, and he’s looming over me, staring down into my eyes.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything, for all the bullshit, for all the pain.” The honesty in his voice, on his face, rips me wide open.
Reaching up, I cup his cheek with my palm, loving the roughness from his scruff against my skin. “It’s okay.”
“Fuck, I don’t deserve you.” He dives for my lips again, stretching his body out against mine and pinning us together so tight I have no choice but to feel his length pressing against my stomach. Heat pools in my core but I tell myself that no matter how good this is right now, we really are starting fresh, and that includes going all the way.