“Marlow…” I said, my voice cracking.
“That’s right, baby. You sure you still want to do this? We don’t have to—”
I nodded, clumsily reaching down and placing my fingers on his lips, feeling my sticky residue when I silenced him.
“Yes…” My voice was a plea, a petition. “Yes.”
I kept saying that word when he re-situated himself underneath me, when his hands went to my hips, yelping and crying it out to the wind when I felt the blunt head of his cock bunt up against me. “Yes, yes, yes…” I panted the words as his hands settled against the small of my back, as he notched himself against me, then they were choked away as he thrust inside.
Honest-to-god tears formed in my eyes at the sudden feeling of rightness. I’d been stroked, teased, tormented for what felt like hours, my nerve endings in a chaotic swirl, but now there was this. I fought to look into his eyes, to take in the lines drawn in his face by a struggle I knew too well.
“I love you.”
The words just came out, but the reaction was intense, immediate. He stroked my hair from my face, probably a rat’s nest now, then drew me down so I lay across his chest, my face buried into the curve of his neck.
“You’re… I’ve got no fucking words. You’re everything to me, Kira, and being here with you. It’s what I dreamt of when I was tied to that chair at the Rutherglen’s. Of you, your scent, your lips, your heart. I wanted to hear those words before I died, before Rutherglen beat me to a pulp. I love you too, Kira, so fucking much, it terrifies me.”
This will open you in ways you haven’t experienced before, Lilith said. Her voice was all dark promise and cautious warning. You’ll not be able to keep them out the way you can the others.
That’s the whole point of this, I said as it occurred to me.
Very well. Kiss your pretty boy and rise, goddess. The corn god is going to spear you through. This isn’t like vaginal sex. It can be forced upon you and bring much pain, or you can choose it. You must consciously open yourself to his intrusion, work to accept him in ways you haven’t before. A spike of fear rattled down my spine. I’ll show you how.
As if in response to the dark voice within, my hips were lifted a little, Marlow still wedged deep inside me, so hard I could feel the throb of him. More lube was drizzled, on me, in me, on Aen, until I felt the jostle of a strong body behind me, fingers digging into my skin and then more—more rubbing, more nudging at my openings, more pressure, more rasping breaths, more trembling limbs.
“Open.” Aen’s voice was a crack of command. “Let me in or this will hurt, Kira. Let me in.”
Like this. Lilith’s voice was a whisper on the wind, rattling through dark forests, skirling through trees.
I became aware of my body in ways I had never before, feeling it shift and move according to my will. Aen was a hard, inexorable presence against it, pushing in, and instinctively, I wanted to fight him. Push him out, keep him away, harden myself against him, and expel him from me.
Because he had wound his way around me and inside me like a beautifully flowered vine, each tendril finding the little cracks in my armour and pushing in until every hard defence I had against him was cracked to pieces.
“Aen…” My voice was a snarl, a warning, but his hands didn’t move away. They held me tight, as they would for the length of our relationship if I allowed it, holding me close, holding me up, scooping me into them when I fell. It made sense it was my sweet red-haired lover that would penetrate me this way, because it was the way he did everything. Patiently, sweetly, but no less strong for that sweetness. He was like fire, burning my defences down, and my body stung like from the lick of flames as he made his way inside.
Accept or reject. Lilith’s voice was insistent, demanding, making me feel like there was more to this than butt sex. He is your consort. We have always found our way to him, but you must choose him. Inanna chose Dumuzid. Aphrodite chose Adonis. Isis chose Osiris.
What? Her words plucked at the corners of my mind, but I couldn’t think, couldn’t talk.
“Open up or this will hurt,” Aen said. “Open or tell me no.”
“Kira…” Marlow panted. “Love. Let him in. We’ve got you.”
We’ve got you. Those words, the promise behind them, were the deciding factor. Just a quickly murmured phrase, but I felt it stab down into me as the two of them pushed deeper. This is what it would mean, continuing things with them, letting myself be pulled along with the sweet, loving caresses they lavished on me. My heart trembled in my chest at the thought of it, of spending a lifetime caught in these arms, of always having them by my side, through anything I might face. I was tough and powerful now, but…part of me longed for the certainty they offered, a place where complete surrender might be possible.
Like right now.
I closed my eyes against them, brought my awareness back to my clamouring body that throbbed and ached in its indecision, wanting, needing me to choose. Well, I chose them.
With a control I didn’t realise I’d ever had, perhaps goddess driven, my body opened, the two of them surging as they always did to fill the gap, to fill me.
“Yes…”
The hiss came in perfect unison. What had been three was one. I was the grateful push of Aen’s cock, finally settling inside me, twitching with need but waiting for me to adjust. I was the sneaky slide of Marlow’s, pushing up into me and against Aen, separated by only a thin membrane, teasing the two of us when we were already on the edge. I was the fight of my body to accept the two of them and the grateful flush of pleasure that came from letting them in. I was a fullness I’d never experienced. Physically, yeah, any time I was craving more, I’d remember this moment, remember what exactly more was. But that was just the surface, body stuff.
My eyes flicked open and took in Marlow’s that had gone a molten green, the light that burned within him shining bright, turning him as radiant as I always knew him to be. His fingers held mine and his eyes did the same, until a ragged hitch of breath revealed exactly what was going on. Tears dropped from my eyes at the sight of him, my love, and he, his skin soaked them up, taking everything I had.
“Kira…”
Aen’s voice was gentle in my ear, an overture, a plea. I bent my back towards him, twisted until my lips were against his.
“Kira…”
Had anyone ever said my name with this kind of reverence? He swept his hand up my neck, cupping my jaw to place my lips against his, no longer using words to communicate what he felt.
“My beautiful girl…”
He kissed my lips and mumbled nonsense to me as he began to move, the two of them being so careful. One worked his way in while the other pulled back, a terrible rhythm that caught me up between them almost immediately.
“My love…” Aen said finally.
That was it, the words I needed to hear and say. A finger caught between my lips as he moved faster, deeper, stopping mine for a moment, making me focus on the way he felt, the crushing pleasure they stirred within me. Marlow moved with an expert ease, grinding into my clit with every upstroke, and made staying still so fucking hard. But that’s what this was—submission. I held them within me, tied them to me, and they repaid me with a delicious coin.