Weary from it all, she attempted to push off the betrayal aside and peered into the small dressing room that adjoined her chamber. Arthur had left a few belongings at home—items that had seemed oddly insignificant at the time. Coats, shirts, a pair of boots, and a folded pair of breeches in the far corner. A well-made but smallish trunk had been pushed snugly against the wall.
As she pushed the boots to the side, she couldn’t help wondering if Arthur had kept similar items in that woman’s room.
She ached from thinking about all of it. She was tired of being sad, and now confused, and angry. It was exhausting.
A nudging kick from inside strengthened her resolve. This tiny human growing inside of her was her purpose now.
Naomi dragged a small stool into the dressing room and sat down in front of the trunk. Luke had assured her she didn’t need to find the paperwork today. He’d suggested she rest, read a book, take a short walk.
Break a few dishes.
He’d stared at her hard and then put water on the stove to make tea for both of them.
No one had ever worried about her the way he did, as though he was more in tune with her feelings than he was with even his own.
Trepidation cautioned her as she stared at Arthur’s trunk. Would she find other secrets he had been hiding? Discover other betrayals? She swallowed hard. If they existed and if there was proof, she’d rather discover them now.
She’d rather learn of them on her own accord. Not by running into yet another woman with horrid accusations.
She’d been living in the dark, but no more.
The chest wasn’t locked and the latch snapped open easily. As a youth, had Arthur packed this same trunk to take with him to school? She pinched her lips together and dismissed the image. Such were thoughts a grieving woman might have for a husband who had loved her.
Had he loved her at all? He could not have!
She reached inside and braced herself.
A bottle, half full of some sort of liquor. She uncorked it. Rum. Nothing surprising in that. She sealed the bottle and set it to the side.
A tin of tooth powder, soap, and a brush. For an instant, it was almost as though he had stepped into the room with her, the scent was so familiar.
Stinging tears threatened the back of her eyes but it was easier to blink them away this time.
After removing a few books, one of which had illustrations that made her raise her brows, she came across a worn leather satchel.
She hadn’t paid close attention to the administrative details of their marriage at the time, but she did remember signing a certificate. And since he hadn’t bothered notifying the War Office, and it hadn’t been with his other belongings, she hoped he’d at least had the courtesy of leaving it here where she could find it.
Opening the satchel, the scent that had grown familiar to her this summer nearly overwhelmed her. She lifted the leather to her nose and sniffed. It didn’t have the same effect it had before. Was she already falling out of love with him?
Was she that fickle? Or was she simply wising up?
She wasn’t fool enough not to admit to herself where he’d been on those nights he’d failed to come home. Not only did the facts make sense, but her brain was able to conjure images of Arthur making love to that other woman.
And it hurt.
It would always hurt—his betrayal.
How had she been so stupid? There had been moments when doubt niggled at her—when she’d been lying in bed alone because he’d not returned for the night and wondered... The first time she’d been terrified for his safety, certain something had happened to him. Why else wouldn’t he come home to his wife at night? In fact, she hadn’t slept at all and by the time he showed his face later the next morning, she’d been so grateful that he was not injured or worse that she’d accepted his explanation without question.
She’d wanted to rage at him, but her upbringing had kept her from doing so. Ladies did not fly into a blue temper at their husbands.
She’d gone on to purposefully ignore the possibility that Arthur would be unfaithful to her. She’d dismissed it outright. While at home, he’d been a perfect husband. Hadn’t he been? He’d never given her any reason to mistrust him.
Had he?
“Are you having any luck?” Luke had silently entered the room and was leaning against the doorframe. “Tea’s ready.”
In answer, Naomi lifted the leather bag.
He nodded. “I won’t impose on your privacy. Ester’s nephew stopped by to pass along that she’s going to remain at her sister’s until Sunday.” And then he ruefully pushed off as though preparing to leave.
“You are never an imposition.” She halted him with her voice. “You’ve been a godsend.” How quiet the house would be after he’d gone—after he’d fulfilled the expectations he’d set for himself as far as she was concerned—and departed for Crescent Park. Even Ester couldn’t afford to remain here if Naomi wasn’t able to pay her.
“I’m not sure God would agree.” With his face partially hidden in shadow, she couldn’t quite make out his expression.
“Do you have to go?” It was a foolish thing to ask. Of course, he was going to have to return home. His sisters and his brother were likely already concerned by his absence.
But he’d misunderstood her question. “You don’t want to be alone overnight?”
She had considered her reluctance to spend the night unaccompanied already and determined she had no choice in the matter. Naomi was a grown woman and as such was quite capable of such. She’d learn to cope without a protector, without a husband.
She stared at the corner where Arthur’s boots had been placed and shivered.
Ghosts of betrayal surrounded her everywhere.
She didn’t want to be alone tonight.
“You… could sleep in the blue room.” She’d prepared it for if, or when, Arthur’s mother or her parents ever deigned to visit them. She’d optimistically considered it a possibility for when the baby came.
She’d hoped. She’d once been confident that she would have a normal relationship with her parents again, and with Arthur’s mother and brother as well.
Was deception normal for Arthur? He’d passionately declared his love for her on numerous occasions. The words had passed his lips easily.
Too easily. And all the while, she’d been living in a state of ignorant bliss. “It’s not as though I have a reputation to uphold.”
Her words sent an unfamiliar wave of emptiness shooting through her. It was as though she was floating around in the night sky with nothing to ground her. Lost and numb, she dropped the satchel and raised her hands to her face.
“Oh, God.”
Luke rushed to her side. “Let it out.” He lifted her as though she weighed nothing and carried her out of this haunted dressing room. Lowering her onto the edge of the bed, he then sat beside her, tucking her into his side.
What was she going to do without him?
“Don’t worry about the damn paperwork today.” He squeezed her closer to him. For the second time that day, she was in this man’s arms. Tremors flowed through her, and she wasn’t sure if it was because of Arthur or because of Luke. “A time will come when you look back on all of this and know your life is better for it.”