“Can I ask you something?”
He dips his chin. “Anything.”
“Why the name Kevlar?” He chuckles, his head throwing back like he’s suddenly shy about telling this story. “C’mon, you have to tell me.”
He groans, facing me. “Fine! After I left the force and joined the club, it was hard for me to transition into the idea of heading into fights without wearing a vest. So, I suggested one day to the club just before I was about to patch in that maybe the club should invest in some Kevlar vests for protection. Needless to say, that didn’t go down too well. Bikers are tough, they don’t wear protection, and I was laughed at… excessively. So that became my name when I patched in.” I try to fight back my smile, but it fights its way through. “See, even you’re laughing at me.”
I giggle. “No, I’m laughing because I think it’s a sensible idea and that the club is too pig-headed to listen to you. But honestly, I couldn’t imagine you with a different name. It suits you.”
He exhales, taking my hand in his. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
“Can I ask another question?” I face him, letting him know this is more of a serious question.
“Of course.”
I hesitate for a moment, but then just go for it. “Why does Ethan have the kids?”
Kevlar exhales loudly. “It stems back to me leaving the force for the club. Ethan doesn’t believe the clubhouse is the right environment for my children. Says it will teach them bad shit. Or they will get hurt. Or worse…” I breathe out heavily. “Also, I left the kids in Ethan’s care for a while after their mother died… which was a bad move. He saw it as me shirking my fatherly responsibilities, but I saw it as getting my head back in the right space.”
“Do you think he’s right? About the kids, I mean?”
Kevlar scoffs. “Ethan has a grudge against me because I left the family for the club. He knows he can use his pull as a cop over me. Says if the kids don’t stay with him, he’ll call in social services. That’s the power he has over me. Ethan has me over a barrel, and he knows it. Social services would choose a cop for them over a biker, any day. I’m not a bad father. I love my kids more than fucking anything. I was… in a real bad place after Em died, and I needed a fucking moment. He’s using that, and the fact I’m in the club, against me.”
“Sounds like Ethan is a manipulative asshole.”
“You’re not wrong. But when it all boils down, he’s only looking out for Sadie and Lucas. He adores them as if they’re his own. He’d never let anything happen to them.”
“Can I ask another hard question?”
“Why not. Let’s get them all out the way.”
“Will you tell me what happened to their mother?” I’m not asking out of jealousy—I genuinely want to know. How can I be here for him and the kids if I don’t understand the full story?
He looks to the ground, but then his eyes shoot up to meet mine.
He’s not shutting down.
“I was a cop when me and Em met. Needless to say, with her being the daughter of a biker, our attraction was frowned upon, but the attraction was absolute. I couldn’t keep away, even though I knew who she was and who she belonged to.”
“Houston Defiance?” I ask.
He tilts his head toward the grill. “Fox and Bub, they’re her parents. Fox didn’t take too kindly to me at first. He said if I was serious about his daughter, then I had to make a choice…”
“Her or the force.”
Kevlar lets out a small laugh. “You know how the story goes… cop leaves the beat, ends up falling for the biker’s daughter. We ended up getting married, I prospected in, then got my patch. But it was fucking hard. Everything I thought I was, the man I trained to be, had to go out the window. It took me a fucking long time to fully commit to the dark side… but Em, she was worth it.”
“And in the process, your cop family disowned you?”
His head bobs up and down in agreement. “Even when the kids came along. Sure, my family saw the kids, we talked, but they were never there. When Em died, that was when Ethan stepped in and took over. I needed a minute to process. So, the kids went to Ethan’s. He took that time to come up with his plan of shutting me out.”
“He shut you out after Em died? That’s horrible!”
“I was distraught, I didn’t even realize it was happening until it was too late, and my kids were gone. I tried to come up with ways to get them back to the club with me. Wraith threatened to have Ethan killed, but he’s my brother. I just…”
“He’s family.”
“He may be an asshole, but he took care of my kids when I wasn’t able to. And as much as he screwed me over at the time, he was taking care of them. I might not get to live with them, but they’re happy and well taken care of.”
“Wouldn’t you rather they were here with you?”
“Always! But I can’t see it happening while Ethan is a straight-down-the-line cop.”
Exhaling, I gnaw on my bottom lip.
Should I ask this?
Fuck it! Here goes nothing.
“How did Em die?”
Kevlar grimaces, like the memory is still so painful for him. He doesn’t look at me, but his hand in mine tightens. “A year after Lucas was born, she was diagnosed with Motor Neuron Disease.”
“Jesus, she had that young!”
He exhales. “Young and sudden. She went in just under a year.”
“God, I’m so fucking sorry.”
I saw a documentary once on MND. In the end stages, the patient has respiratory problems, difficulty swallowing, pain, cognitive changes, and variations in their speech. Usually, the cause of death is respiratory insufficiency. The thought of Kevlar being there to watch his beautiful wife decline at such a rapid rate is earth-shattering news.
“I miss Em every damn day. But wallowing in my grief is no good for me or our kids. I did for a while, but it was pointless.”
I move over, resting my hand on his leg. “You don’t have to close yourself off to her completely. You can always have a place for her in your heart.”
“And I do. It’s best to try not to get caught up in the emotion of it all.”
“You’re an amazing man, Kevlar.”
His eyes meet mine. “And you’re an amazing woman, Jovie.” Kevlar rests his hand on top of mine on his leg, sending an electrical jolt throughout my body.
Goosebumps prickle all over my skin again. “Thank you for opening up to me.”
“This feels good… talking to you.” He reaches out to stroke my cheek.
“Yeah, it does.”
He drops his hand. “Tell me about you?”
I inhale, sitting taller. “I was studying to be an attorney, so I could try to bring the Slavers down until my mother got sick with a virus. They never really knew what was wrong with her, some crazy bug that struck her down suddenly. She was sick over a few months. I took care of her, so I dropped out of my program and went to work at The Lone Wolf instead. I’d work at night and be home during the day to take her to doctor’s appointments. No doctor could figure it out… and she died. I never went back to my degree program. I didn’t see the point.”