For a moment, I consider not answering it, but then the thought crosses my mind that it could be Loni. Dropping my computer and cookies onto my bed, I hurry across the room to answer the door.
It’s not Loni, though. It’s Saint.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, my voice sharp.
His eyebrow quirks. “What do you think I’m doing here?”
Of course, he’s come for sex. That’s all I really am good for, isn’t it?
“What, so you want to get off and then abandon me again? Thanks, but no thanks,” I snap, then realize with horror that I’ve said something I had absolutely no intention of admitting to.
It takes him a moment to catch onto my outburst.
“Were you mad I wasn’t here this morning?” He’s grinning. Goddamn it, why is he grinning?
I stare at him blankly and pray that I seem indifferent. “It’s whatever. I’m just not in the mood tonight to be your fuck toy, okay?”
I go to shut the door, but he stops it with his hand.
“It never bothered you before when I slipped out early,” he points out.
He’s right, and I don’t have a good explanation as to why it’s bothering me now.
“It’s fine.” I give a stiff shrug. “You dip out early and don’t talk to me all day, that’s pretty standard, isn’t it?”
His expression lights up with dawning realization. “I see. You’re pissy because I didn’t give you enough attention.” He pushes through the door, forcing me backwards. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll remedy that.”
He grabs my waist and kicks the door shut, kissing me as he backs me toward the bed. I pound my fists against his chest a few times just so I can say I resisted, but then I give in and melt for him as he lays me down and strips me of my clothes.
Almost an hour later, we’ve given each other a couple orgasms, and to my surprise and delight, are snuggled under my covers watching a scary movie and munching on cookies. It’s the most normal thing we’ve ever done together, and I’m loving every moment of it.
“This movie’s shit. And I’ll never watch American Gods again without picturing the hot dead wife as a creepy ghost kid,” he mutters, even though his eyes are riveted to the screen.
I grin and shake my head, biting into my cookie.
“I told you we could turn on something else…” I begin, but he cuts me off.
“You wanted to watch the one about dead people on a boat, so that’s what we’re doing.” His voice is gruff, as though he’s admitting to something he’d rather not be. My smile widens, and I blush.
Even though I’m pretty sure things will go back to normal tomorrow, I decide to relax and enjoy a taste of what it would be like to be in a normal relationship with Saint Angelle.
11
Saint falls asleep shortly after the movie’s over. He must be exhausted because I’ve never seen him pass out so fast. It seems our roles are being reversed because I’m wide-awake and full of nervous energy. Now that he’s not distracting me, everything else that’s wrong in my world has come flooding back into the spotlight. There’s no way I’m falling asleep anytime soon, not with my brain firing on all cylinders.
Slipping out of bed, I decide to go sneak to the rec center for a little while to try and burn off some of my stress. I quickly dress into some workout clothes, pile my dark hair in a messy bun, and sneak out of my room, careful not to wake Saint as I go.
Before I leave for the rec center, I move down the hall to Loni’s room. It’s late, but I know she’s a night owl, so I’m confident she’s still awake. Stopping at her door, I knock and wait, bouncing on the balls of my feet as anxiety buzzes through me. I realized earlier as I was lying with Saint, being normal, what I need to do with Loni to make things better.
It’s just a few seconds before she opens the door. Her dark eyes widen when she takes me in.
“Mal? What’s going on? Where are you going?”
I shake my head. “That doesn’t matter. I need you to do something for me, okay?”
She looks confused and definitely hesitant. “What is it?”
“Come to my room tomorrow night, and we’ll talk. I’ll tell you what I can, okay?”
She blinks, then an apologetic expression crosses her features. “Mallory, oh, I didn’t mean to make you feel guilty. You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to. I was just—”
“No, you were right. I’m so sorry, Loni.”
Wrapping my arms around her, I hug her tight. She returns my embrace after a heartbeat of time.
“Alright, I’ll come by tomorrow,” she tells me softly.
I pull away and let out a sigh of relief. “Good. Okay, I’m heading to the rec center for a bit. I’ll see you later.”
“Be careful.”
I nod and turn from her, feeling lighter as I make my way to the elevator. Riding it down to the first floor, I walk out of the building into the cool night.
Campus is so quiet this late. It’s soothing, not having anyone stare at me or whisper behind my back as I pass by. When I reach the athletic center, I make my way to the boxing room. I’ve had zero interest in returning to the pool since Jon Eric’s death, but a few rounds with a bag should wear me out.
Turning the corner, I pause when I see light streaming out of the weight room just up ahead. Who else is crazy enough to be working out this late?
I slowly make my way forward and peek through the doorway, ready to bolt if it’s one of the coaches and not another student. To my relief and surprise, I spot Liam sitting at one of the benches, flipping through his phone. There’s sweat dripping from his forehead, so he’s been here awhile already.
In an attempt not to startle him, I knock on the wall loudly. He jolts and looks up, his expression relaxing when he realizes it’s me.
Tugging his earbuds out, he says, “A little late for lifting weights.”
I walk into the room, grinning. “I could say the same to you.”
“I prefer when no one else is around. Easier to relax.”
“I get it.”
He slides a hand over the back of his neck, looking sheepish. “I’m sorry again for Friday,” he says. “And for yesterday in the hallway. Both times I was a real prick.”
I open my mouth to respond. To tell him it’s no big deal, and that I shouldn’t have snapped the way I did, but then he levels me with a serious look. “So, you and Saint, huh?” As if saying those words aloud makes him physically ill, he sneers. “Together at last.”
I stare at him, feeling a surge of disbelief that he suddenly wants to talk about my relationship with Saint. Not Jon Eric. Not the fact he went on a week-long bender because of what had happened the night he and Saint got rid of the body or the fact that wasn’t the first time they played with dead things. He wants to discuss my love life.
The worst part? I can’t answer him. Not only because I’m so irritated that he’d ask me that, but because I don’t know if Saint and I are together.
It seems like we are, but tonight was the first night we actually acted like a couple, and it felt like a fluke. I don’t know that he wants more from me, other than sex and allegedly to protect me from his father, whom I haven’t seen since Parents’ Weekend. Saint is possessive of me, sure, but that’ll no doubt wear off in time.