Sinking back on my heels, I touch my face. Out the corner of my eye, I see a police officer approaching. Another wild look of fear crosses Kim’s face, but it’s gone in an instant.
“You alright?” the police officer asks me, his expression grim as he looks between me, Kim, and the girl. If he saw what happened, he doesn’t mention it.
“Name?” he says, standing in front of Kim, who pulls himself to sitting with a wince.
The girl with the green braids watches Kim with narrowed eyes. It’s a predatory look. The sort of look that’d make your skin feel itchy, but Kim doesn’t even turn her way. Weirdly, I think I catch Kim glancing at me, but his eyes shift away so fast I’m not sure if I imagined it.
“Evan. Evan Granger,” he says in a forced bored voice as if he’s trying to pretend he doesn’t care that he’s about to be arrested. Now he turns to the girl, and she gives him the tiniest nod, as if she’s satisfied.
I don’t know why he’s lying about his name, and I don’t know why I don’t call him out on it, but I don’t. There’s something weird going on. Something not right.
“You did good tonight, kid.” Kerry nudges my shoulder as we ride across town in the back of a police car to give our statements at the police station. I agreed when she said we might as well get it over with now, rather than having to come back in tomorrow on Christmas Day, or the day after, when I’m due to be leaving the country. The other guards are riding over with Glen in his monstrous people carrier. “You alright?”
I nod, my forehead rested against the window, my eyes transfixed by the Christmas lights strung up all round the town centre. I feel like I could stare at them all night.
“Glen’s bringing your bike over so you can ride straight home after this. Or you know, go break a leg at the skatepark.”
I look over at her and smile. Bringing my bike wouldn’t have been Glen’s idea. “Thank you… Gonna miss you, you know.”
“You’re a million miles away already, aren’t you?”
I put a bit more effort into my tired grin. “Pretty much.”
But really, I’m not sure where I am right now. I’m not sure how I feel. Seeing Kim again…him not even remembering me…him lying about his name…him being involved with sketchy people who steal four-by-fours to break into warehouse car parks and don’t even seem to like him, or at least seem to watch and judge the things he does…it’s just thrown me is all. The Kim I knew wouldn’t have hung around with people like that, wouldn’t have done stuff like that. I should probably just forget it. Two days and Kerry’s right, I’m out of here, a million miles away.
Giving my statement doesn’t take long, and in less than half an hour I’ve changed out of my uniform, made a promise to pop in and have a boozy mince pie and some mulled wine with Kerry and Jill sometime tomorrow, and I’m on my way out of the police station.
Relieved to finally be finished, I take in a deep breath of cold night air, then head over to the bike rack where Glen’s chained my bike.
“You’re still doing your stunts, then?”
I spin around. Find Kim leaning against the wall, one leg kicked back against it, a twig that I at first think is an unlit cigarette, dangled between his fingers. Long wisps of hair have escaped his hood—they drift across his face in the breeze.
For a second, I’m too thrown to say anything. I open my mouth, close it, then find myself saying, “They let you out quick.”
There’s about a thousand things I want to say to him, to ask him right now, like why did he lie about his name, what the hell was he doing tonight, and why did he leave without a word two years ago, but yeah, that meaningless observation is the first thing that comes into my head. Fabulous. I pull a face.
“Police know I was coerced. Didn’t want to be in that car, didn’t have a choice.”
It doesn’t sound too likely—the police must hear that sort of shit all the time, but I don’t say that. Instead I crouch down in front of my bike.
“Sorry I spat in your face,” he carries on.
Pretending I’m focusing on working out the lock’s combination rather than just staring at it, I shrug. “You didn’t.” He only pretended to. If I’m honest, what’s bothering me more is that he pretended not to recognise me when he obviously did.
“Well, still, I’m sorry about that.”
I don’t respond. I’ve no idea what to say. So I try to give off an unconcerned, unbothered vibe, because really, I have no idea how the hell I’m supposed to be acting right now. Kim throws me into chaos—he always did.
He kicks off the wall and wanders closer. His clothes have seen better days. Tatty jeans, a frayed orange hoodie underneath a dirty-looking army coat that’s too thin to be keeping him in any way warm in this freezing weather. His trainers look like the garish ones he used to wear two years ago, only now they’ve got holes in. “Didn’t want Char to think I knew you.”
I rest my head on the cold metal bike rack. This conversation is confusing me. This whole situation. Maybe I’m just too tired. Adrenaline does weird things to your brain. And the whole incident with the four-by-four, then chasing him across the car park was a bigger rush than I’ve had in a while.
Maybe that’s why I do actually say, “Wasn’t sure you’d remembered me.”
But it comes out sounding so much more painful than I mean it to. It doesn’t hurt so much, not anymore. And why should I have assumed he’d remember me? Time passes, people forget things, it’s just life, I know that.
Some weirdly sad expression clouds his sharp features, but then he smiles, all teasing and light. “Who’d have ever thought the amazing Tommy Grace would turn out to be the tiniest bit insecure.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Fuck off.”
Kim grins, his sharp fox face alight. There’s no heat to my words, just like there’s no intended truth to his. It’s a game we used to play, his teasing and my reacting. It takes a lot to truly piss me off. Slow fuse and all that. Probably why Kim never did hold back on ribbing the hell out of me every chance he got.
He kneels down in front of me on the freezing concrete. It’s hard to look at him full on, so I don’t. When he smiles like that, like he knows what I’m thinking, like anything is possible, it still takes my breath away, still flips my stupid heart.
My fingers are shaking, but I get the combination to unlock the heavy chain right on the second try. Then I shove the whole thing in my backpack and reach for my helmet. A few rounds on the ramps at the skatepark should exorcise any amount of ghosts and help me forget tonight.
“Can I get a lift into town?” Kim asks quietly.
I raise an eyebrow. We’ve not seen one another for over two years and he’s acting like he saw me last week or something, like he really has forgotten what happened between us.
“I’ve got no cash for a taxi.” He stares into the quiet dark beyond the police station. “And you never know what might be out to get you on Christmas Eve.”
“You always did watch too many European horror movies.” He had a thing about fairy tales and folklore. Anything with Krampus scared the shit out him, and he loved it. I hold out my helmet to him, and for a second, he gets that weird sad expression again, but only for a second.