Didi shook back her hair and picked a slice of mushroom off her pizza. ‘I thought I might change my mind.’
‘You wouldn’t do that, though. So that’s a lie, isn’t it?’ Caz gave her foot a gentle nudge to show she wasn’t angry, and saw the faint wash of colour rise up Didi’s neck. ‘See, the thing is, I got kicked out of school at fifteen so I never took any exams, and because of that people tend to assume I’m a bit dim. And when it comes to maths and physics and geography they’re probably right, but where other things are concerned, I’m pretty on the ball.’ She paused significantly. ‘And when it’s anything to do with emotions, I’d say I’m top of the class.’
‘OK, I just thought there was enough going on around here without me adding to the drama. I didn’t want people to think I was trying to divert attention away from Red dying.’
‘You see, that’s another good answer.’ Caz pointed a triangle of pizza at her. ‘And it’s almost believable. But I think the real reason you kept quiet was because you didn’t want me to worry, or because you didn’t want to give Shay something to think about.’
Bingo. Didi’s shoulders slumped in defeat. ‘God, how do you even do that? Honestly? OK, you’re right. But you have to know, all I want is for you and Shay to be happy. You’ve found each other and that’s what’s important. And I swear on my life I’d never do anything to try and come between you; I just wouldn’t. I’m not that kind of person, I couldn’t live with myself.’
Caz nodded. All these years she’d been adept at fooling herself when it came to the men in her life, pulling the wool over her own eyes and believing what she’d so badly wanted to believe. But now it was time to grow up, get a grip and pay attention to her subconscious instead of sticking her fingers in her ears and going la-la-laaa.
‘I know you’d never do that.’ For a moment she thought she was going to cry; thankfully the heat at the back of her eyes dispersed in the nick of time.
‘You have to believe me,’ Didi insisted.
‘I do. I completely trust you.’ Caz reached for her hand and held it. ‘You’re a good person.’
‘So are you. And if you two ever fall out, I’ll always be on your side.’
‘That’s good to know.’ Dammit, now she really might cry. ‘And can we always be friends too?’
‘Definitely.’ Didi raised her own wedge of pizza in a toast and solemnly touched it against Caz’s. A piece of pepperoni slithered off and landed in the lap of her white shorts.
‘Shall we get a bottle of red sent up to celebrate?’
Didi gave her a warning look. ‘You’ve got an interview and an audition with a world-famous director in the morning. So I’m going to be a good friend and say no.’
Could she make herself do what she knew deep down she needed to do? Caz wondered. Did she have it in her to act like a mature adult for possibly the first time in her life? She reached for her can of Diet Coke and playfully flicked a few drops in Didi’s direction. ‘You can go off people, you know.’
Twenty-four hours later, as the plane was nearing the end of the nine-hour flight, Caz removed her eye mask. The woman in the business-class seat next to her exclaimed, ‘Oh, thank goodness, I thought you were never going to wake up! Can I have a quick selfie to show my friends I was sat right by you? Otherwise they’ll never believe me.’
Caz was known for always being nice to people when they stopped her in the street for a chat and a selfie. She sat up, waited for the woman to come and crouch beside her, performed the obligatory smile, then said, ‘Can I just check it’s OK?’ and reached for the phone.
Yes, as she’d guessed, the woman had been taking sneaky snaps for hours. Over a dozen of them whilst she’d been wearing her eye mask.
‘Sorry, couldn’t help myself. It’s OK, though, you weren’t snoring or dribbling. You look lovely even when you’re fast asleep!’
‘Well that’s something. Sorry, you’ll have to excuse me.’ Switching on her phone and popping in her earbuds, Caz said, ‘I need to learn some lines.’
The woman looked overjoyed. ‘Ooh, how exciting, why don’t I help you? I’d love to do that!’
‘Thanks, but it’s something I need to do for myself.’
Caz hadn’t been asleep. All the way across the Atlantic she’d been weighing up everything she knew and wondering if she could bear to go through with it. Would she regret it forever if she did, or struggle to live with her conscience if she didn’t? Could she ever be genuinely deep-down happy knowing what she did?
‘Ladies and gentlemen, could you please return to your seats and fasten your seat belts,’ came the announcement over the tannoy. ‘We’re now beginning our descent . . .’
And there was Shay, waiting for her at the arrivals gate, deeply tanned and handsome in jeans and a sea-green cotton shirt. Caz’s heart flip-flopped with yearning as she took in the easy stance, the windswept sun-bleached hair and that beautiful smile.
Maybe he really does love me.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Oh, that familiar irresistible mouth. ‘You didn’t have to come and meet me. I could have got a cab.’
‘No bother. I wasn’t doing anything.’ He rested his hand on her waist as they headed towards the exit. ‘So how did it go, meeting him? When will you hear if you’ve got the part?’
That was Shay; he always asked the right questions and listened to the answers. To anyone else watching, he seemed like the perfect boyfriend. Behind them, Caz became aware of the telltale click of a camera phone and turned to see the woman from the plane giggling with her friend. The woman waved and called out, ‘Bye, Caz, lovely to meet you!’ The next moment they heard her stage-whisper to her friend, ‘Blimey, is that her boyfriend? Wouldn’t kick him out of bed!’
OK, enough was enough. Spinning round, Caz said, ‘Let’s face it, he wouldn’t be in your bed in the first place.’
The woman reddened and hurried away with her friend. Shay frowned. ‘Why did you do that? She didn’t mean anything by it.’
‘I know, I’m stressed. She was taking a load of photos of me on the plane. Sometimes people can be really annoying.’
‘Let’s get you back to the villa.’ He led her out to the car park, where the rented four-by-four was waiting for them. ‘You’ll feel better after a sleep.’
Caz said nothing, pretty certain she was going to feel a whole lot worse.
Chapter 46
Three hours later, after a fitful doze and a long, cool shower, she joined Shay outside for dinner. Bright stars studded the sky and a crescent moon hung over the sea like the hook in one of those grab-a-teddy machines. As they ate their red snapper, she told him all about the meeting with the director and what it would mean workwise if the job was offered and she accepted it.
‘I’d have to spend six weeks over in New York. How would you feel about that?’
‘It’s your career. I’m not going to tell you what you should do.’ He was relaxed, unaware that this was one of the easy baseline questions before the real ones got started in the lie-detector test.