“Nothing,” I conceded, “it means nothing.”
“Where are they anyway? Shouldn’t they be here by now? We go on in fifteen.”
Alistair had organized with the club manager for us to do an impromptu performance. It was supposed to be a surprise, but everyone knew we rarely showed up to a party and didn’t perform. My heart wasn’t in it though, not tonight.
“There was a problem getting past the Die Hearts. They think Levi is inside that car.”
“Fuck.” Hudson scrubbed his jaw. “Are security—”
“Already on it. They should be here any sec—” My eyes found her almost immediately.
“Holy fucking shit, is that Eva?” Hudson practically drooled beside me. I nudged him in the ribs, feeling possessiveness stir in my chest. She didn’t belong to me, but if he thought for a second, I was going to tolerate him jonesing after her, he was sorely mistaken.
He wasn’t wrong though. Eva looked as hot as sin. Every bit the star she was about to become.
“The leather jacket has Letty written all over it,” Hudson remarked. I grumbled some reply, barely able to take my eyes off her. I knew I was staring but I couldn’t help it.
“Yep, good luck with that.” Hudson clapped me on the back, chuckling to himself as Riley spotted us and made her way over, the girls trailing behind.
“Ladies, looking good.” His gaze swept over Eva and Letty, lingering a little too long on our support act. “Riley, I’m almost empty.”
“It’s an open bar, Hudson. I’m your assistant, not your gofer. You have hands, use them. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to find Alistair.”
“Is she allowed to talk to us like that?”
“Maybe if you didn’t insist on pushing her buttons it’d go smoother.” I suggested.
“Nah, she’s too easy to work up. Besides.” his eyes followed her across the club, “it’s all part of the irresistible charm.”
“Please tell me you’re not going to try and bed her.” Letty sounded mildly disgusted.
“What?” Hudson gawked at her. “She’s hot and I like a challenge.”
Eva turned her attention to the dance floor, watching the hand selected audience—contest winners, industry types, friends of the label—fake it up.
“Yo,” Hudson nudged me, “we’re up.” He pointed to where Damon and Levi were chatting to the club manager.
“Kill it,” Letty said, holding up her fist.
“You know it.” Hudson downed the remnants of his beer and slammed it on a nearby table before fist bumping her. “Laters, baby.”
“You’re performing?” Eva asked. “I didn’t know.” Her eyes slid to Letty’s in question.
“I thought it would be a surprise.” Guilt flashed across her face, but I didn’t miss the conspiratorial look she shot me.
What the fuck was she up to?
Knowing Letty, it was nothing good.
“Are you okay?” I asked Eva before I could stop myself. “You know... with everything. It was pretty wild out there.”
A couple of guys barreled past us, knocking Eva into me. My hands shot out, steadying her. “Hey, watch it,” I yelled after them.
“Shit, sorry, Rafe, my man. I didn’t see you there.”
“It’s not me you almost flattened.”
“Fuck, my bad.” The guys held up his hands to Eva. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine, really.” She stepped back and I released her, jamming my hands in my jean pockets. I shouldn’t have touched her. Because now it was all I could think about doing.
“I should...”
“Go, of course. Good luck up there.” Eva flashed me a blinding smile. It was more than I deserved, but no less than I wanted.
Damon and Hudson were right. I wasn’t sure I could do it—keep her at a distance, suppress my feelings for her. Especially not when she was standing there, looking at me like I was everything she wanted.
Everything she needed.
“Rafe,” Letty’s voice grounded me. “They’re waiting.”
“Uh, yeah… right.” Tearing my eyes away from Eva, I made my way over to the guys, who were already on stage setting up.
“What took you so long?” Levi asked me, none the wiser, too amped up to notice.
Always too distracted to notice.
“I’m here, aren’t I?” I grabbed the guitar—one of my back-ups since my favorite was back at the hotel safe and sound—and slid the strap over the neck. The familiar weight of the instrument settled me. Became an extension of me. A way to channel all the shit I had to shoulder. When my fingers ran over the frets, I was free.
“Welcome to Basement Vibes,” Levi stepped closer to the mic, adjusting the stand the way he liked it. “For those of you who don’t already know it, we’re Black Hearts Still Beat, and Gary, the owner of this very fine establishment, asked us to stop by and play a few songs tonight.” Actually, our label had brokered the performance, but Levi knew the routine. He knew how to work the crowd and tell the people what they wanted to hear.
The room exploded with applause, a much less raucous response than what we were used to. But these people weren’t your average fans, so we had to work a little harder for their approval. Levi shot me an amused look, his lip curving into a devious grin. Shaking my head, I silently tried to tell him to abort whatever fucked-up plan I knew he was hatching.
“We’ve been warned to be on our best behavior tonight,” he went on, “but we’re about to go on tour. And if you have any idea what it’s like to be cooped up with three other guys for months on end, then you’ll probably know it’s only healthy to blow off a little steam beforehand. So what d’ya say, Charlotte. Do you wanna help me fuck things up?”
Alistair caught my eye, dragging a single finger across his neck. Fucking Levi. He hadn’t only gone off script, he’d ushered the room into near silence. A couple of people down by the front of the stage, probably contest winners, whooped, but everyone else stared wide-eyed, mortification etched in their expressions. Their disapproval only spurred my brother on. He gave Hudson the nod, mouthing something at him, and the intro beat of one of our darker songs, Poison in My Veins, filled the room. I cursed beneath my breath as I plucked the strings, building the opening bars. We were supposed to be sticking to our more mainstream material, but no, my self-sabotaging brother had decided to pick the one song he knew I had vocals on.
The one song he knew I wouldn’t want to sing.
* * *
It stings, it burns, but the pain don’t hurt
Cut me open and I will bleed, oh, you’re poison...
Poison in my veins.
* * *
I clutched the mic, eyes closed, stage lights blazing down on me as the words spilled from my lips. Beads of sweat rolled down my back, clung to the strands of hair falling over my face.
* * *
Cut me open and I will bleed, oh you’re poison...
Poison in my veins.
* * *
You say you want to cleanse me, save me, purify my soul