The covers stirred as she got back into bed, resting her head close to mine. “Better?”
Was I better? My migraine had dissolved with the rest of me. But was I better? No. I was in true danger of losing my heart and soul entirely. As I drifted off to sleep, one thought held firm: the prospect of giving this woman the fractured pieces of me was terrifying.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Lucian
I woke weak but pain-free. Emma had effectively handled that. Part of me wondered if I had dreamed it. But as I was naked, my balls and abs tender with a satisfied ache, I knew it was real. She’d done that for me. Touched me with a greediness that had me coming far too soon. Touched me with a gentleness that wrapped itself around my heart and squeezed tight.
So tight it hurt. It was uncomfortable, this feeling—this exposure—like a scab picked too soon. Sprawled on my bed, I stared up at the ceiling, willing my body and brain to come back online and get a move on.
Emma wasn’t next to me. I couldn’t recall her getting up, but I’d been out of it, falling into the best sleep I’d had in ages. Sounds came from beyond the drawn curtains that separated my bedroom from the rest of the house. A little frisson of alarm went through me; she was in the kitchen. The woman was a right menace in the kitchen.
Grunting, I hauled myself upright and out of bed. It took a second for the room to settle, and then, with the gait of an old man, I walked to the bathroom. I might have retired because of concussion syndrome, but the truth was my body, like many of my teammates’, had taken a beating over the years. Physical aches and pains liked to make themselves known when I woke up.
Right now, I felt the old twinges in my left knee, the zings of protest along my back and right shoulder. But these pains were good; they reminded me that I was alive. Stinking and sore, I took a hot shower, scrubbing away the remnants of the migraine. The sun was already low in the sky, a whole day lost to pain and sleep. Not the way I’d wanted to spend it.
While Emma’s mouth had been a benediction, fucking glorious—a fever dream—I wanted to please her. Taste her. Take her. Not lie there helpless and needy. I’d make it up to her.
After toweling off, I slipped on a pair of shorts and padded out to the main room. My gait faltered at the sight of her standing in front of my stove. She hadn’t yet seen me but hummed under her breath as she stirred a pot of what smelled like leftover tomato soup. Dressed in one of my T-shirts that ended midthigh, leaving the rest of her curvy legs bare, she took my breath, made my heartbeat wild and erratic.
I rubbed my chest, half convinced I was having an attack. But it was her. Just her. Heating up soup. This woman had the potential to turn my life on its head. Hell, she already was.
As if hearing my internal panic, she turned my way. A brilliant, happy smile speared me, dead center of my drum-tight chest. “Hey. You’re up! I’m heating some soup.” She chuckled, the sound tickling my skin. “And stating the obvious.”
All that tightness melted like buttercream over warm cake. I struggled not to sigh like a besotted fool. But I probably failed, because her happy smile returned, wider now, like she was excited to see me. My body felt lanky—awkward, even—as I went to greet her, sliding my hand to the back of her slim neck before ducking down to kiss that pretty pink mouth.
She tasted like lemonade and Emma, a flavor I couldn’t break down but that was fast becoming my favorite. She hummed with pleasure as I drew away with a last lingering nuzzle.
“I’m starved,” I told her hoarsely. I was starved for her. And she knew it. Her face was far too expressive. On myself, I’d consider that a liability, but with Emma, I craved watching her, figuring out what she was thinking just by the way the delicate curves of her face moved.
But I was also weakened. So I sat down and let her serve me, knowing she took pleasure in doing that as well. I understood. Feeding people—pleasing them with food—was satisfying on a bone-deep level.
Delilah’s offer flickered through my head, causing my pulse to kick up a little with anxious beats. At one time, I’d wondered if I should become chef de pâtissier like Jean Philipe. But that hadn’t been his dream for me. He’d never truly gotten to see me play. What would he think of me now? Floundering without direction. He would have hated that.
Stomach quaking, I gave Emma what was probably a fake-ass smile as she set a bowl in front of me. “Thanks, Snoop.”
She took a seat next to me and started to eat, her gaze darting to me with clear hesitation. “You okay?”
She claimed she saw strength when she looked at me, but I felt as though I’d only shown her weakness.
“I’m good.” Another fake smile pulled at my lips. “Especially after your . . . what are we calling it? Remedy?”
“I was going to go with blow job,” Emma countered with a cheeky smirk.
“I’m good with that.” We ate in relative silence, and I let her fuss over me, getting me slices of bread, a glass of lemonade. Because it made her happy. And a happy Emma glowed with an inner light that I couldn’t take my eyes off.
I waited until she’d cleared the dishes, watched her pert ass flex and move beneath the thin cover of my shirt as she bent to put the bowls in the dishwasher. When she came near again, I hooked my arm around the curve of her waist and hauled her onto my lap.
She came willingly, laughing a bit, as if startled. Her weight settled on my thighs, warm and grounding. My hands found the juicy globes of her ass, and I gave them an appreciative squeeze as I drew her closer. That I could touch her now was a gift. A dream.
Emma’s hands settled on my chest. I felt that touch in the center of me.
“Hey,” I whispered, smiling as I kissed her softly, lightly. A little hello. A small taste.
I felt her smile against mine. “Hey.”
I kissed her again. An acknowledgement. “Thank you for taking care of me, Emma.”
The concession was worth it, just to see the way her eyes lit with happiness.
Her hands tunneled into my hair. “You’re welcome, Lucian.”
I wanted to make love to this woman. Take my time, learn her secrets, what made her sigh, what made her cry out for mercy.
My mouth moved over the satin skin of her cheek to the curve of her neck. She shivered, tilting her head to give me access, her fingertips pushing deeper into my chest. She smelled good, sweet. The swells of her breasts brushed my chest, and my breath hitched, my hands gripping her ass harder.
Needy. She made me needy. Took me apart in ways I couldn’t predict.
I loved it. Hated it. But I didn’t stop kissing her, my tongue slipping out to taste her skin.
Emma shivered again, rocked into me, her fingers threading through my hair. “Lucian?”
“Hmm . . .” My lids lowered as I nuzzled the hollow of her throat.
“I want to ask you something, but I’m afraid you’ll get upset.”
Her words crusted over my skin, rendering me still. Then I breathed, pretended my pulse hadn’t spiked. But she probably felt it, as close as she was.
More interested in kissing than talking, I trailed my lips back up to her jawline. “That sounds a lot like bait, honey.”
“It is.” She kissed my temple. The crest of my cheek. “But I’m also serious.”