Larry lunges for me, but William intercepts. I know this isn’t going to end well, not for me or for Will. Everything happens so fast. Fists start flying, landing with heavy thuds against skin and bone. Tears fill my eyes as screams and grunts erupt inside the room. I can’t make out what belongs to who. All I can do is pray that Will is going to be okay. He has to be, he’s the only thing keeping me together here.
My mind is in disarray from fear as I helplessly watch the scene unfold.
“You’re as good as dead, boy,” Larry yells and pulls something from his pocket. Then I see it. Something shiny, metal… the blade catches in the light.
He has a knife. Larry has a knife. My brain screams the warning at me. I act without thinking. Without fear. Jumping up, I throw my body between Larry and William. I don’t care what the outcome is, all I know is I have to protect Will, protect him like he’s protecting me.
The pain of the blade as it slices through my skin barely registers in my mind. I don’t care about the physical pain because there are much worse pains. Like the pain I feel as I look at William. Seeing all the blood soaking his shirt. Blood… so much blood.
“Dove! Wake up…” I feel hands on me, warm, and firm. My eyes pop open, and the first thing I do is try and sit up.
“Calm down, it was just a dream, there is nothing to be scared of…” Zane’s soft voice filters into my mind, but I’m still there. In that room with him.
I would do anything to bring him back. Anything for him to be alive today. I would have gladly taken his place. I should have been the one dead.
Pressing a hand to my stomach, I look down at my sweat-soaked body. I trace the scar there… Blood. So much blood… William died, and it’s all my fault.
“There was blood, so much blood,” I whisper. Tears prick my eyes, but I blink them away. The weight of the cuff on my wrist disappears, and then he’s there, right in front of me, his dark eyes piercing mine, looking at me with nothing but kindness.
“Shhh, it’s okay. I’ve got you,” Zane whispers as he pulls me to his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around me. Holding the broken pieces of my soul together.
I know I shouldn’t, that it’s stupid and wrong, but I seek out his comfort. Needing it so badly, it hurts. I’m too weak to deny it.
He’s nothing but a stranger, but he’s all I have. Clutching onto his shirt, I pull him closer. I want to embed myself beneath his skin. Burying my face in his chest, I inhale deeply. Clean. He smells like soap and man, and very slowly, the dream recedes.
As I come down, floating like a leaf through the air, I’m reminded that the last time I felt this safe was with him… William.
It doesn’t make sense. I shouldn’t feel safe with this man. He’s certifiably crazy, he drugged me, kidnapped me, and that’s not even mentioning all the other things that he’s done, but at this moment, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.
There has to be something wrong with me if I’m seeking out the comfort of my captor.
After what seems like forever, he pulls back, his eyes travel down my body and land on the spot where my scar is hiding under my clothes. He must’ve seen me holding my stomach. I expect there to be a hunger, a lustful need in his gaze, but there isn’t. All I find is a tenderness that makes my chest tighten.
“You’re safe, Dove. You’ll always be safe with me. Whatever your nightmare was about, it was only a dream. I’ll always watch out for you.” Something about those words tugs on me. It takes my sleepy brain a moment to let what he just said sink in.
You’re safe. I’ll always watch out for you…
“That night, when I walked home from the club, did you follow me?”
“I did.”
“There was a guy at the party. I think he followed me—”
“The one in the plaid shirt?”
“Yeah. He was following me home, wasn’t he?”
“He was, but I took care of him.” I draw in a shaky breath, not knowing how to feel about what he just said. Took care of him. That’s code for killing him. “He wanted to hurt you, Dove, and he would have if I hadn’t been there.”
I know he is right. That guy would have hurt me, but did he deserve to die because of it? I feel terrible, strangely not because he died, but because I feel very little remorse, even though it’s partly my fault.
Lifting his hand, he softly touches my skin there. Even through the thin fabric of my sleep shirt, the gentle touch feels like an electric shock. Not one that would make you hurt, but one that wakes you up, makes you feel alive.
His fingers dance over the scar, and he touches it the same way I touch it when I’m nervous. Closing my eyes, I let my arms fall to my side and just let him touch me. I revel in the feel of his fingers on me. Enjoying the closeness without thinking about all the craziness between us.
For a moment, I just want to be happy and feel safe. He gently tucks me back into his side, his fingers never stop caressing my stomach, moving back and forth right over my marred skin.
“Go back to sleep,” Zane coaxes, his voice deeper than usual. “It’s still the middle of the night.”
Exhaustion washes over me again as I settle deeper into the down feather pillow. My head feels heavy, just like the rest of my body. I shouldn’t feel content in his arms. I shouldn’t let him touch me like this, in an intimate but non-sexual way. I shouldn’t… but I am. And that’s how I fall back asleep. Content and happy, blissfully ignoring the danger I’m in. Tomorrow, I’ll worry about what I’ve let happen. For now, I’m going to let my captor give me a belly rub, enjoying every second of it as I drift back into a dreamless sleep.
16
I hardly sleep for the rest of the night. Not because I’m not tired, but because I don’t want this moment to end. It feels like a dream, one I’m going to wake up from any second. I hate that she had such a nightmare, but I fucking love the way she came to me. She let me calm her down, the way she opened up, letting me hold her, touch her. For the first time, it felt like she really believed that I was more than the guy who took her.
Lying there beside Dove, I watch her chest rise and fall for a long time. My gaze moves slowly as if I’m taking a picture of each part of her. Soft, pink, plump lips, tiny nose, beautiful high cheeks. The tiny freckle in the corner, near her lip. I don’t want to ever forget these moments with her.
It doesn’t take long for me to grow restless. I’m used to keeping busy, so I force myself out of bed, moving slowly, so I don’t wake Dove. I have some stuff to check, and I’d rather do it when she’s asleep, that way I don’t risk another fight or more questions I don’t have answers to.
Walking out to the kitchen, I close the bedroom door behind me and head to the coffee pot. I fill the coffee filter and push the brew button, listening to the machine work. A few minutes later, I take my steaming cup of hot coffee and walk to the library.
Setting my cup down, I kneel in front of the cabinet that holds my safe. I open the door and punch in the code, watching as the heavy safe door pops open. I pull out the laptop and phone and sit down in the recliner.
The laptop and phone itself are password protected, then there is another passcode that needs to be entered every time you connect to the internet. Having a connection built into the bunker was a pain in the ass but necessary. I need to know what’s going on outside, after all.