“Um. How about fuck you?”
He laughs. “You’re not pissed. You’re angry with yourself and searching for your nearest outlet to unleash on. Figure out your shit with Amy. Talk to a therapist, write in a journal, write her letters. I don’t know. But it’s time to forgive yourself for things that could not be helped or changed. That were not your fault. And after you’ve done all that, don’t let Maia get away. Because that blonde sleeping in your guest room is it. She’s amazing. She’s your girl, Keith. I think you know it too which is why you came back tonight. Don’t fuck it up. That’s my best piece of advice and I strongly suggest you take it.”
Jasper stands up, walks over to me and claps me hard on the shoulder.
“We leave in a little more than two weeks. And she’s coming with us one way or another.”
And with that, he’s gone. Just walks out of here, taking his beer with him.
He has his woman waiting for him. A woman he risked his relationship with his brother for. Am I ready to risk everything for Maia?
Figure my shit out with Amy, he said.
And he’s right. Because in all the many years since she died, I haven’t done that. I pushed it back into a box and shoved it into the darkest corner of my mind. Maybe Maia isn’t my Pandora after all. Maybe she’s my salvation. My way forward. My way back.
Maybe.
Or maybe I’m the one about to unleash all my evils on her.
18
Maia
* * *
My eyes blink open, staring sightlessly at the ceiling of my bedroom. And just as they did all night long during my restless, sleepless night, visions of what happened in the car come hurtling back to me. I told Keith I wouldn’t regret it, and I don’t.
But I was right about the harsh light of day thing.
Because even though I don’t regret it, I’m not sure it was the wisest choice to let my boss finger fuck me to orgasm in his car. Especially after he told me he had enough sense not to fuck me. That he wouldn’t do that to me, whatever that means. You know what that means.
Yeah. I do know what that means.
Then again, like the lust-drunk woman I was last night, I told him I was cool with us going back to normal today. Am I? I honestly don’t know. I’ve never had a man do that to me before and the first to do it is someone I’m developing quick and hard feelings for. It’s a conundrum.
One I need to navigate past carefully.
After I came upstairs and bawled my eyes out and didn’t fall asleep, I made myself a promise. That what happened last night, truly would not happen again. That I would focus on my job and paying off my debts and finding a new place to live. That I would force my heart to shelter in place. To go on complete lockdown where Keith Dawson is concerned.
I think the fact that I live here and spend so much time with him is the main culprit with us. We obviously have a thing going. A chemistry. But hopefully all this heat will fizzle out and die once I leave and we only see each other in a professional capacity.
It has to.
He doesn’t want to be with anyone who isn’t Amy, and I don’t want to risk not only my job but my heart. So there. Decision made. Thank god we didn’t have sex. That would have really ruined everything. He was right in that, and I was wrong to push us as far as I did.
Even if I don’t regret it.
A loud clang from downstairs startles me upright, my eyebrows pinching in at the unfamiliar sound as I clamor out of bed, hitting my cast on the nightstand and yelping out. I hate this cast. I hate every white inch of it. Two more weeks and I’ll be a free woman.
Another heavy banging startles me, and after I use the bathroom, clean up my face, brush my teeth and get dressed, I open my door only to be assaulted with the scent of cooking oil and some kind of sweet batter.
I make my way down the stairs with slow, cautious steps, as jitters creep up my spine.
I’m nervous to face Keith after last night.
It’s Saturday and I know Marco is not coming early. Typically, Keith would be swimming but when I looked out the window, not only did I not see him in the pool, but I found dark gloomy clouds and a lot of rain. Which means he’s the one making all that noise in the kitchen.
Which means I need to pull my big girl panties up and face him.
“Yeah, I think I got it,” I hear Keith say only I don’t catch anyone else speaking to him, so I assume he’s on the phone. He laughs. “You seriously want that? Fine. I’ll take a picture of how it turns out and send it to you but if it ends up on IG, I won’t be so thrilled.” I hear him moving around the kitchen, the sound of pots and pans shifting on the stove and the aromas of cooking food growing heavier in the air. “I know,” he says solemnly. “I know. I’m glad it’s you. I don’t think I could have done it with anyone else. Truly, I really appreciate it and I owe you one.” He laughs again. “Fine. Consider it done. Yeah.”
I take another step down the stairs and the board creaks beneath my foot. Shit. He totally heard that and knows I’m eavesdropping. No hiding it now. I suck in a deep breath, holding it steady in my lungs as I descend the rest of the steps and round the corner into the kitchen. Keith is wearing a red apron with a big heart imprinted on it that says no one’s cooking is better than mama’s. He’s in front of his huge eight-burner stove, placing pieces of what look like battered chicken into a pot of bubbling oil. Beside it, he has a waffle iron going with a large bowl of thick, creamy batter beside it.
What the ever-loving fuck is he doing?
“I gotta go, babe.” Babe? “My houseguest just walked in.” He smirks at me, throwing me a wink. Houseguest? Wow. I’m not sure which one stings more. The fact that he’s clearly talking to a woman he called babe or that he just referred to me to that woman as his houseguest. I mean, I guess I am, but still. “Yeah, we’ll talk later. Love you too. Bye now.”
He disconnects the call and greets me with a huge warm smile I can’t find in me to match. I want to ask a million questions, but I’m not entitled to any of the answers. So instead I force a smile and say, “‘Morning. Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt your call.”
“You didn’t. That was my sister, Beth, and we were pretty much done talking.” His sister. I shouldn’t be as relieved to hear that as I am. Lockdown, remember?
“And how many sisters do you have again?”
“Five. Five younger sisters. Beth is second behind me. Then comes Danielle and Gabrielle, they’re the twins. Followed by Joy and then Eden is the youngest.”
“Damn.” I snicker. “I would have gone crazy with an overprotected bear like you as an older brother.”
He chuckles. “You have no idea. My parents worked a lot. My dad ran a garage, and my mom was a nurse working graveyard shifts. I helped raise my sisters. And let’s just say, I made sure none of the local boys, including my bandmates, went anywhere near my sisters.”
“And they still talk to you? Your sisters I mean.”
“Yup. We’re all still very close. I’ve been lucky enough to be able to pay for school for all my sisters and help my parents retire. Not sure all that would have been possible without Wild Minds’ success.”