I barely remembered the drive there, and as I stood in line at the Playground, I almost chickened out, but I forced myself forward.
Once past the purple Mohawk dude checking IDs, I stepped inside to that same heavy beat that vibrated through my bones. The same energy as last time too, and I smiled because this wasn’t so bad. A bit loud and frenetic but doable.
Propelled forward by the sheer volume of the crowd, I stepped toward the familiar bar. I paused momentarily so my gaze could track Skylar on a riser, and damn, he stole my breath. He was so beautiful up there with his dramatic makeup, skimpy shorts, and crop top. I was stark in comparison. Plain and boring. Well, maybe not in the bedroom. I grinned, thinking about this thing I did with my tongue the other day that made him shout to the high heavens.
That kept me moving toward the bar, and luck was apparently on my side, because a seat opened right then. I slid on it happily.
“What can I get you?” Dane asked. “Hey, I know you!”
I grinned. “Nice to see you again. I’ll have a beer.”
I watched him grab a glass, then pour my beer from the tap, while I also took in all the gorgeous people around me. Yeah, I felt plain and invisible in this crowd, but I also felt free in a way I didn’t in any other setting. I was queer and proud, and though this wouldn’t always be my kind of place, it felt good to be able to step inside and just be myself.
Dane leaned forward as he slid the beer toward me. “Does he know you’re here?”
I shook my head, my cheeks heating. Did it make me look like some stalker? We’d just had a fun night with my friends, and here I was, not an hour later, at his place of employment.
“Just needed to get out?” Dane asked.
“Something like that.”
So I sat there, sipping my beer and watching the dance floor and my friend-turned-lover. When some guy got handsy with him, my stomach tightened, until I saw how he shrugged him off in his own smooth way. He could protect himself, and logically, I knew that, but sometimes I wanted to drag him away from the crowd and ask him to come home.
Home. It hit me then. He was beginning to feel like home, which was dangerous. But friends could feel like home too, right?
A guy slid in beside me and started chatting me up, and though he was being flirty, I kept the conversation casual. Until I felt a hand on my shoulder—a very warm and solid hand.
“Ohmigod, Clark! You’re here.” I turned in my seat to find a sweaty and sexy Skylar, likely taking a break, and after those dance moves, he deserved one.
“Yeah, hope it’s okay.” I motioned with my hand. “I felt restless and decided to come.”
“Of course it’s okay.” He looked around the bar. “No Gretchen and Hope?”
“I think they wanted to be alone, if you know what I mean.” I winked. “It’s okay, I’ve been keeping myself busy.”
“Uh-huh.” His gaze swung to the flirty guy sitting beside me, and I saw a flicker of jealousy there. I liked it. I liked that he gave a damn.
Suddenly his hand was on my jaw and he was pulling me in for a kiss. Fine by me. I thought it would only be a chaste peck on the lips, but instead his lips lingered, and when his tongue flicked out to lick into my mouth, we were both all in. We were making out in the middle of a bar, and holy fuck, it felt strange, but I couldn’t stop even if I tried because this was Sky and his kisses were like some sort of potent magic.
“Wow, someone needs to get a room,” a voice said beside us, and when I jerked back, I had a feeling it would be Jesse.
“Or we can just keep kissing in a crowded bar,” Skylar said, and as my cheeks flushed, I noted that the guy beside me had turned away to talk to someone else. Message received, I guessed.
“Hey, you should come downstairs to the Underground to hear me sing and Seth play,” Jesse said in an excited voice, and now I noticed he was wearing a fedora with a pretty teal feather. “Dane normally works down there, but they needed help here tonight.”
“You should. It’s really cool,” Skylar said. “But you’ll need the password. Tonight it’s fleshlight.”
Once my flush wore off and Skylar traipsed back to work, I headed in that direction. And damn, the vibe was completely different downstairs. Like a bar out of the Prohibition era, and Jesse singing while Seth played the piano only added to the atmosphere. They were, in a word, amazing.
After watching a set, I headed back upstairs with the intention of leaving, and this time I wouldn’t do it without saying goodbye. As I neared Skylar’s riser, where eager men had surrounded him with dollar bills, I tamped down my jealousy and tried to just appreciate him in his element.
He spotted me in the crowd and motioned me over, then bent down and whispered in my ear, “I meant what I said. I expect someone to be naked when I get home.”
I shivered as something pure and emboldened arose inside me. It was now or never. “Maybe you should be naked too, on your hands and knees for me.”
When Skylar got my meaning, his eyes widened. “Holy crap, is that what you want?”
“Maybe…yeah.” I faltered briefly before finding my nerve again. “I just…yes, it’s what I want.”
He kissed me again, and the crowd went wild.
“Thanks a lot,” he said as he drew back. “Now I’ll have a boner for the rest of my shift.”
“Sorry, not sorry.” I pecked his lips. “See you later.”
29
Skylar
I was excited to get home to Clark.
That should have made more warning bells go off in my brain, but they either weren’t there or I was doing a good job ignoring them. I told myself it was because—well, because sex. Clark wanted to fuck, and I definitely wanted to fuck, and God, I was going slightly crazy thinking about Clark inside me.
Maybe it was strange to think of it this way, but I was really proud of him for tonight. Not just for coming to the bar on his own, but for telling me what he wanted. That was a big step for him and one he deserved to take.
My shift ended a little before closing time. I cleaned up and changed into pants and a tee before jumping into my car, an unmistakable nervousness flittering through my veins.
Holy fuck.
I was nervous.
To have sex.
I’d never been nervous about sex in my whole life, not even the first time. I’d known I wanted it, and while it hadn’t been the best, because it had been his first time too, it had been exciting and new and everything I’d wanted it to be.
But this was Clark. My Clark. And that made it unique. That made it special and scary and nerve-racking. What in the hell was he doing to me?
I hurried home—to Clark’s place. When I arrived, it was dark other than the light he always left on for me. My legs felt ridiculously weak as I made my way to his room, expecting to see a very primed and ready Clark there, but when I stepped inside… The soft glow of his lamp illuminated him, and he was naked like we’d said, partially propped up by the pillow, but it was clear he’d fallen asleep waiting for me. He still had his glasses on. His head was tilted slightly to the side, his lips parted just a bit.
I moved closer and closer, this strange fullness in my chest. My heart sped up, then did this weird stumbling thing as I looked at him, hand on his belly, flaccid cock resting on his thigh, and…God, I liked coming home to this. To him. The truth of that ran laps around my brain, the urge to bolt intensifying, but a stronger emotion kept me there. One that wanted me to climb in bed with him, wrap myself around him, and ask him not to hurt me, not to be one of those guys like Mom always ended up with, who threw her away, but then, like I’d said, she hadn’t always been perfect either, and what if I was like her? What if I somehow hurt Clark too?