After the incident, she had locked both the gun and the journal in the lock box and forgotten about them. But when Tootsie was well enough to take the walk to the dog park again, Ashley remembered that she’d had the journal with her on that last trip, and she stopped to retrieve it. When they got there and Tootsie was comfortable with some dogs her size, Ashley sat down to read. It was back to Priscilla’s normal ramblings about her perfect daughter until she came to an entry that disturbed her.
September 8, 1919
Dear Journal,
Perry is more and more sullen every day. He swears I don’t give him enough attention. “‘It’s Nora this and Nora that,’ you’d think I didn’t exist at all,” he said to me last night when I finally got Nora to sleep after prayers, two drinks of water, and two bedtime stories.
I know he’s right in some ways because she does wear me out now, and by the time she’s in bed, I’m ready to go to bed myself because I’m so tired. We no longer sit around and listen to the radio together or dance to the Victrola. We no longer snuggle together in bed, and I can’t remember the last time we were intimate. But really, he needs to understand that Nora is my priority. Just as his priority is to work to feed and house our little family, my job is to mother and care for Nora. She takes all my time. She makes messes everywhere she goes, and to keep the house clean like Perry wants it, I’m constantly following behind her to pick up. Things will get better as she gets older and can pick up after herself, so I ask him to be patient, but he seems at his wits end.
I don’t want this precious child to come between us, but I fear she already has. And each day, he grows more and more distant from her. When she calls “Da Da” to him, he no longer comes running as he used to. Instead, he says, “Shut her up. I’m sick of listening to her.” I pray things will improve soon.
Priscilla
When Ashley looked up from that entry, Tootsie and a dog that Ashley hadn’t seen before were eyeing each other suspiciously. Ashley set the journal down, took the leash, and rescued her dog. They walked home; Ashley was still afraid to try jogging with her. She locked the journal back into the gun safe.
That evening, when Perry decided he wanted companionship, she was courteous with him.
“Tell me about your daughter. What was her name? What was she like?”
He fell onto the couch as though he would have fallen if it weren’t there.
“I told you. She died in her sleep. It was tragic. Priscilla never got over it.”
“And you? Did you get over it?”
“I missed her, of course; she was part of us. But a father never has the bond with his children that a mother does. Why do you ask?”
“No particular reason. I have been thinking my biological clock is ticking. I may want children. That’s something you can’t provide. Though you can be interesting company, can satisfy me in my dreams, and cook wonderful meals, you can’t provide all my needs. We have to be honest here.”
The makeup he wore was thick enough that she could see his forehead and mouth wrinkle into a thick frown.
“Then you’ve said it. I’m not man enough for you.”
“You’re not alive, Perry, face it.”
He stormed out of the living room. She assumed he had vanquished himself to the carriage house, as he often did when he wanted to be alone.
Good riddance to him, she thought.
The next day after work, Tootsie and Ashley took off to the same dog park with Priscilla’s journal tucked inside Ashley’s backpack with water bottles, two granola bars, and a Frisbee.
Although she was fascinated by the journal, she knew she couldn’t ignore Tootsie every time she took her to the park, so she planned to give her some undivided attention that day before reading. When they arrived, she placed her backpack on the bench she had used the day before and took out the Frisbee. She and Tootsie played catch, and other dogs and their owners joined in.
Suddenly from the double entry gate she heard a booming male voice call out, “There’s my fine lady, how are you, Ashley?”
When Ashley looked up, she spotted Eddie Ridgewood, the man she’d met so many months before on the plane coming home from Miami. He had a beautiful brindle boxer on a leash and led her to where Ashley stood open-mouthed watching him and his dog.
“Eddie, how are you? It’s wonderful to see you,” she said.
“It’s been almost a year, and you look more fine than the day we met,” he said and whistled.
She laughed and smiled. “You made me feel so good that day when I needed it, and here you are doing it again. Who’s this pretty lady you’ve got with you?” Ashley asked looking down at Eddie’s boxer.
“This is Edda, named after my grandma who raised me. She’s my sweetheart. And yours?”
“This is Tootsie. She’s a rescue. Part German Shepherd, part Labrador as near as they can guess.”
“She’s a beauty, and look they get along, just like we do.” The two dogs were sniffing each other and wagging tails like they were long lost friends.
Ashley picked up the Frisbee and Eddie took it from her and tossed it the length of the park. Both dogs went running after it. They both laughed.
“Wow, Tootsie’s really trying to impress Edda. She hasn’t run like that in over a month. She had a fractured rib.”
“Poor thing. What happened?”
“Long story. A friend’s ex-boyfriend kicked my dog.”
“People who kick dogs should be sent to me for kicking,” he said and lifted his leg up high and did a karate kick in the air.
“Well, that’s impressive!” Ashley said.
“I’ve got lots of moves I couldn’t show you in an airplane,” he bragged and laughed.
She laughed too and they took turns throwing the Frisbee to their dogs.
“So what did you do about that stupid husband of yours?” he asked.
“Divorce. I moved from Vermont to New Hampshire, so I wouldn’t have to set eyes on him again.”
“But you owned a company. He screwed you out of that?”
“No, my partner and I expanded. We have G & J Renovations Vermont and G & J Renovations New Hampshire now. Meet Ms. New Hampshire.” He high-fived her. “My brother and his family and my mom live in the area too, so it’s very sweet,” she added. “And you? How’s business?”
“'Busy as a ‘one-armed paper hanger’ as my granddad used to say. The economy’s good, so people are adding patios, walkways, and retaining walls. I can’t keep up with the demand, really.”
“That’s great news. Congratulations.”
By then, Edda was standing with the Frisbee waiting for Eddie to take it from her. “Looks like my Edda beat your Tootsie.”
“I guess so, but she’s still recovering, so that doesn’t count.”
“You’re competitive even with your dog,” he said, “I like that.”
“I play a mean game of Scrabble, water volleyball, and jog, too.”
“I could be up for those. Hey, would you like to go out for a bite to eat? There are some outdoor cafes in Nashua; they’ll let us have the dogs on leashes.”
“Sounds wonderful,” she said. “Won’t your wife or girlfriend mind?” She had to add that question because she needed to know.