But then she wouldn’t have me there to pay for her appointment. Since Violet didn’t have health insurance, everything would be out of pocket until we could set her up with something—if that was even possible. Just another thing to worry about.
She gave her name to the reception and handed them the check I’d prepared in advance. I had no clue how much pregnancies cost, but if one appointment was two-hundred and fifty out of pocket, times however many appointments she’d have until she gave birth, I estimated we’d be well into the thousands before this baby was even born.
Violet sat in the empty seat beside me and played on her phone as we waited, one hand absentmindedly gliding across her stomach like she was playing a little song just for her baby.
It was still hard to imagine my baby sister having a baby. The sister I’d fed in the middle of the night when our parents were out partying, the sister I’d soothed when she had nightmares, the sister I’d taught how to apply eyeliner, the sister I’d hugged after her first heartbreak in high school—that sister was soon going to be responsible for another human’s life.
She hummed as she played some colorful candy game, to a song I recognized from our childhood, a song our mom often played for us, Faithfully by Journey.
If I closed my eyes, I could remember good times with my parents. It wasn’t always bad—the spaces between our many moves were punctuated with nights where Mom and Dad danced in the kitchen, picking up Violet and I and dramatically serenading us. This was before the twins came around and life really fell apart for them. Once they were outnumbered, they just didn’t know what to do anymore. Luckily my aunt was there to pick up the slack, but it was a miracle they hadn’t continued to procreate and dump more babies off on her.
Out of the four of us, Violet was the most like our mother in looks and disposition. She had her deep olive Mediterranean skin, like I did, but she had our mom’s hazel eyes and curly hair. Also like our mother, she was kind of dreamy, quick to fall in love, and too gentle to stay mad at for too long. All of which had likely made her a target for her asshole ex-boyfriend. I hoped that those parts of Violet would come back. I didn’t worry about her becoming like our mother because though she was my little sister, she didn’t have the same delusions that the twins had about our mom. She didn’t have a fairy tale image of some magical life before our aunt stepped in. Unfortunately, she’d learned the hard way what an absent mother was like.
She continued to hum the song that held so many good memories for me, and I closed my eyes, letting the song take me away from the troubles of the moment.
“Navy?” Violet nudged me. “Do I need to tell them about the abuse?”
My eyes snapped open as I considered. “I…”
“You still volunteer at the women’s shelter right?”
“Not recently.” It’d been months since I’d spent any amount of time in the kitchen at the shelter. “I mostly just bring toiletries and stuff like that by.”
“But you used to. The women who were abused, do you know if they told their doctors?”
I closed my eyes a moment, thinking. It had been a while since I’d actually spoken with a woman at the shelter, but the one that stuck out in my mind provided the answer Violet was asking for. “I am relatively positive that if you self-report domestic violence in this state, the health care provider is required by law to report it to local law enforcement.”
Violet’s eyes went wide. “But… th-that can’t happen. I can’t let this get back to Tyler. He’ll find out where I am. If he…”
I stopped her with my hand covering hers and angled my head forward, reminding her to keep her voice low. “Then you don’t report it. Most of your bruises are fading.” I squeezed. “Don’t worry. Whatever happens, we will get through it. Pinky promise.”
She hooked my proffered pinky with hers. “I don’t want to talk about it. Not with anyone else.”
I nodded because I understood. Eventually, she’d need to talk about it with someone who was able to appropriately help her—more than I could, at least. But she’d had too many choices taken from her already; I’d let her decide when the right time for that conversation was.
“What if they figure it out?” Violet’s whispery voice went high pitched and I squeezed to gently remind her to quiet. “Can I ask them not to report?”
“No, I don’t think you can. I believe they’re obligated to. But you don’t have to talk about it. This appointment is about your baby.” I swallowed. “That’s all that matters. That baby. Keep the focus on the baby. You’re going to get to see that little guy or girl on the screen, for the first time. Remember that, think about that.” Thinking about it gave me a lump in my throat, so I could only imagine how she felt.
“Violet,” a nurse called from the door.
Violet turned to me, eyes wide and searching.
“Go. After they do the standard exam, I’ll join you for the ultrasound. It’ll be fine. Trust me.”
Violet stood on shaky legs and made her way toward the door, giving me one last look before she disappeared beyond it. I gave her a reassuring smile but the moment she was out of my view, I let out a breath. How had I not thought of them questioning her about the abuse sooner? I should have scheduled her appointment after her bruises had entirely faded. But I hadn’t.
I pressed the heels of my hands against my eyes. I was supposed to protect her, keep her safe. If her doctor found out about the domestic violence and reported it, Violet could be in more danger.
Out of habit more than anything, I pulled out my phone and saw the text message I’d missed from Delilah.
Delilah: I don’t think I can stay late tonight. Something’s come up.
How would my aunt have handled a situation like this? I wasn’t sure, so I replied.
Me: What’s come up? There are only a few hours until close.
Delilah: I have something going on.
Immediately, my mind went to something too personal that she couldn’t share. I couldn’t very well force her to work if there was a personal crisis. I sighed, knowing I’d have to drop Violet off at the cabin immediately after this and race back to Amber Lake.
Me: I’ll be back in town in an hour and a half. Can you make it until then?
Her reply was immediate: That’s fine.
I rolled my head, cracking my neck. The tension in my neck and shoulders was too tight to be fixed from a few neck rolls, but a massage just wasn’t in the cards right now. Just a couple more weeks, and my aunt would be back. She had magic when it came to scheduling. And Delilah loved my aunt too much to bail on her.
Since I had to wait an indeterminate amount of time before joining Violet for her appointment, I texted Hollis.
Me: Sorry again that I had to bail last weekend.
Between the store and the twins’ end of school activities, I’d had to cancel the movie date with Keane and my standing girls’ night with Hollis. I hadn’t even seen her since everything had happened, hadn’t uttered a single word over what had been going on. Violet had given me free rein to tell Keane and Hollis, but it just didn’t feel like a conversation for a text. And telling her what had happened with Keane also didn’t feel like something I could casually text.