I drifted back to the look on Kennedy’s face at Lucy’s, and my heart lurched in my chest. She wanted kids. Sure, she let me off the hook by telling me that she wanted me, not them. But the two wants weren’t mutually exclusive. She could want both, and by choosing to be with me, she’d lose out on her chance to have them.
“Are you ready to be a new dad?” Dom moved on from talking about my balls to focus on Remy and I was almost able to ignore the fact that my dick was perilously close to having a needle shoved into it by the tailor. “It’s gotta be nerve-racking.”
We might be Marines, might have served overseas and watched our friends die, but there was something about the fear of having a child that made even the strongest men into whimpering fools.
“Actually, yeah.” Remy looked down at his hands and then back up to me. “I’ve loved her since I didn’t know what love was. You know what I’m saying. Nox is mine, too; don’t get me wrong. From the first minute, the love that I have for her spread to him. But I did that. She’s having another baby, with me. A little girl, who’ll look just like her mother. A little sister for Nox.” He choked up for a moment. “Did I tell you that she wants to name her Cassie?”
Silence filled the room, heavy and full of the emotions that we’d hide from the rest of the world. Our families, our community, had been hit hard with loss. Destruction and death didn’t seem to stray far from Birch County.
“That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard.” My throat clenched around the words, and I blinked back the tears that formed.
Cassie Townsend, taken far too soon, was like a little sister to me. She and Casper were the other set of twins in our crazy families, and Danny and I looked out for them growing up. Twins had to stick together after all. And thinking of her always brought back memories of Danny.
Finally, the tailor let me off the table, and all I could see was Kennedy. Kennedy holding a baby that would never happen.
Fuck.
I was the most selfish man in the world. But I wouldn’t let her go. Not after I’d tasted the promise of forever on her lips.
20
Kennedy
I would never, for the life of me, understand how people stood in front of a mirror and felt beautiful while wearing a bridesmaid dress.
All month while preparing for Parker’s wedding, I went along with what she wanted. It was her wedding. So we rushed around and got measurements for dresses. I didn’t care what they looked like. Honestly, it was Parker’s day, so I didn’t bother even looking at myself in the mirror when I got my final measurements. All I could remember was the color gray, and maybe a purple accent.
We were so busy working, planning, and putting together the dream wedding that she didn’t get with Danny that I barely had time to sleep, let alone think about anything to do with my relationship with Linc.
On top of everything, my little sister had her babies. Twin boys that we were all absolutely in love with. Which meant there was even more for me to do to help prepare for my brother’s wedding. Especially since our mom was helping Casper with the boys.
“You look amazing,” Parker called out from her side of the room, dragging me out of my thoughts and the only piece of quiet I’d had since she dropped the surprise wedding on everyone. “Why can’t I look like you do?”
I tried not to move, otherwise the awesome woman trying to work wonders with my curls would stab me with a knife or something.
“Because you’re like seven months pregnant and finally starting to show.” I also eyed the plate of French fries that sat in front of her pointedly. “And you keep eating like I do, so you’re gonna get fat like me.”
Parker shrugged, not caring in the slightest about the comment. She knew I wasn’t calling her fat and that I never would.
“How are the boys?” She started to squirm in her seat, and the man putting on her makeup sighed good-naturedly and then sat back so she could get up to pee.
“They’re good,” I called out loudly. “Casper’s dealing with trying to boob feed them at the same time, and she said it’s like having the devil sucking on her tits.”
Emma and Vi both laughed at whatever Parker was doing, but I couldn’t see it from my position. So, I just had to wait for her to get back in my line of sight.
“That’s a terrible image,” Nia, my stylist, said with a grimace in the mirror. “You’re just about done. I wish all my clients had hair like yours. So thick and it just goes exactly where I want it to. I barely had to use any product.”
“Well, you’re a badass,” I told her. “Because all I can get it to do is either curl or sit in a bun.”
I stared at myself in the mirror, and I had to admit that she made me look good. I couldn’t see everything because I had a gray robe on to cover the bridesmaid dress. But my face looked immaculate, with a slight blush and lipstick that complemented my complexion perfectly.
“Holy shit, I’m the last one.” Parker groaned when she saw that I’d joined Emma and Vi just sitting there, doing nothing. “This isn’t cool.”
“You know, if you sat down and let Chris finish your hair you’d have been done first, right?” I grabbed a bottle of water, hoping that maybe if I drank something, the headache pounding in my head would go away. “Meanwhile, I still feel like I got hit by a truck.”
“That’s what you get for staying up until dawn for three days straight to make sure things were done.” Vi yawned and then leaned against Emma’s shoulder, closing her eyes. “We could have been doing that now.”
“Yeah.” I rolled my eyes even though they couldn’t see it. “Because it’s not like the wedding’s supposed to start in five minutes at all.”
Chris, Parker’s stylist, stepped back and eyed everything critically before smiling. “You’re gorgeous,” he said. “And even if you moved constantly, I don’t think it messed anything up.”
We took off the robes and picked up the bouquets that we’d stayed up until three in the morning putting together, and I almost cried when I saw how stunning Parker looked.
Her dress was pale silver, with hints of lace all around the bodice and down onto her train. The dark-brown hair that she refused to cut was styled elegantly. Half up and half down, with braids and flowers cascading down her back.
We all turned right as the door opened and Nox stuck his blond head into the room. “Come on, Mom, you’re late.” His eyes took in the sight of all of us dressed up, and they turned to saucers. “Holy balls, you guys look good.” Nox stepped into the room and made a beeline for his mom. “Actually, Mom, you look beautiful.”
We got to see him in his tux for the first time, and my heart melted. The little trousers and the suspenders I could see poking out in the opening of his suit, which wasn’t buttoned. To top it off, he had a bright-purple bow tie on, one that he’d picked out himself.
“I look good, I know.” He winked at us, badly, and then hugged his mom.
She knelt down, and thankfully the photographer was in the room with us, because I’d completely forgotten to bring my phone. It was currently sitting in Linc’s truck, with my hidden stash of tacos that I’d had the cook at Lucy’s make for me so I had something to snack on after the wedding.