The butterflies are getting stronger now. I’m starting to wonder if I can even pull this off. Who am I kidding? He doesn’t want me, and the more he fights me off, the more I want him with wild abandon.
Is this really hopeless? I have spent all this time and energy today, and people will be expecting me to be there. I can’t back down now.
I check my watch again, and it’s just after six. The sound of the doorbell chimes, making me jump. I really need to get my shit together.
I hold my breath again and stand leaning my ear against the door to see if Jake will answer. To my relief, I hear voices. There’s a greeting from Jake, and the sound of Bill’s voice comes echoing up the stairs. I like Bill. He’s a good guy. At the age of fifty-eight, he’s like the father-figure of the station. He used to be an active officer, but these days, he prefers a desk job. He once told me that he isn’t the young man he used to be anymore, so he needs a quieter life. His wife is more than happy with his decision, and I can’t really blame her. Who knows what will greet a police officer each day he or she goes out on the beat?
“So where is the lovely Ana today?” I hear Bill ask.
I suck in a breath, waiting for his answer. “I’m not sure. She may be in her room getting ready.”
The voices become muffled after, so I pull away from the door. By now, I’m practically hyperventilating.
Get a grip already!
I walk towards my bed and toss the bag with my dress in upside down. It’s a beautiful dress and apt for the occasion. With a sigh, I decide to hit the shower again for a quick wash. It probably isn’t wise, but I’m sweating again and need some light relief.
I put my hair up in a loose bun and step into the shower. Once there, I keep my distance from the water to stop it hitting my hair or makeup and close my eyes as the cool water relief helps ease my tension. As I stand there, I see Jake through my closed lids. I can see that familiar hunger in his eyes, and it makes me gasp. In my fantasy, I see him caressing my breasts and kissing me like his life depends on it. I feel his fingertips trail down from my breasts to my stomach before cupping my pussy. I let out a heavy sigh, and it quickly snaps out of my dream. It would seem Jake has made me into this living, breathing sex machine. I can’t stop thinking about it now I have had a taste. I just want more. So much more. Once will never be enough.
With a heavy sigh, I get out of the shower and towel myself dry. I let my hair down and check my makeup is still in place. Luckily, all seems fine.
Knowing I can’t put this off anymore, I place my dress over me and look at myself in the tall mirror from the corner of my room.
I can tell more people are downstairs as I can hear the familiar chatter. I check the clock, and it reads six-thirty-seven. Where has the time gone?
I take a few deep breaths. It’s now or never.
Opening my door, the voices immediately grow louder. I take each step as lightly as possible and creep down towards all the commotion.
Once I get to the bottom of the stairs, I turn around. It’s only then I notice just how quiet everyone is. I have what feels like a hundred pairs of eyes staring at me. I go a bright scarlet before plucking up the courage to speak. “Has someone died in here? I thought this was a party.”
I hear a few chuckles, and all returns to normal. It’s then I spot Tony as he swiftly walks my way. “Ana, wow! Just … wow. Words fail me. You look even more beautiful than normal—if that is even possible.”
He gives me a hug and kisses me on the cheek. I briefly look around for Jake, but can’t find him anywhere. How else am I supposed to flirt with people if he isn’t here to witness it?
With a little sigh, I turn to Tony with a smile. “Thank you. It is nice of you to say. I need a drink, so I’ll just head to the fridge for some wine.”
Tony winks at me as I pass. I smile a little and walk straight towards the kitchen. On the way, I pass a few more people, and they all compliment my dress. I thank them and open the cupboard to grab a glass from the counter. In the fridge, I notice there’s some Pinot Grigio left, so I grab it and pour myself a glass. Some much-needed Dutch courage is the name of the game tonight.
Once I have the glass in hand, I glance out the window into the pool area to find Jake at the barbecue, cooking up some burgers and sausages. With the door open, I immediately get a whiff of the smell, and it hits me then just how hungry I am.
Jake looks like a god. Even standing at a hot barbecue, sweaty and possibly feeling the heat ten times worse than everyone else, he looks good enough to eat. He laughs at what someone says, and as if sensing I’m here, he turns around to face me.
My breath catches in my throat. He’s staring at me with those piercing green eyes again. At that moment, we’re locked to each other, and no one else in the world exists. It’s only a fleeting moment—just a few seconds—but it feels as though his eyes have burrowed deep into my soul. Right in this moment, I don’t care whether or not he ever lets go.
As usual, it doesn’t last long. Jake’s stare is broken by Ian’s want of attention. I avert my eyes and suddenly realize I have been holding my breath again. I let out a deep sigh and down my glass in one go.
Boy, am I nervous!
“Steady there, girl. You have all evening to get drunk. Why start so early?”
I jump at the sound of a familiar voice. “Sorry, Tony. It’s just been a bit manic today, and I thought this might calm me down. I will slow it down. I promise.” I give him a gentle smile.
Tony smiles back and walks to the fridge to grab the bottle of Pinot. He pours me another glass and sets the bottle down. He looks me in the eye with worry and sweeps a lock of hair away from my face. “If there is anything you want to talk to me about, or if there’s anything I can do for you, I am always here, okay?”
He’s so sweet, but he could never make me as happy as Jake could. “Thanks, Tony, but I’m fine. Really, I am.”
“Can I at least ask if you’re seeing someone?”
What on earth do I say to that?
“It’s just complicated, that’s all. I have things going on in my head that I need to sort out first before I can enter into any kind of relationship. I’m just not ready right now.” He looks disappointed but seems to understand.
He’s about to reply when a voice coming from the kitchen interrupts us. “Well, you can always have lots of meaningless sex with me, baby. If you want something uncomplicated, I’m your man.”
I whip my head around to find James standing there with a devilish grin on his face. I’m about to make a sarcastic retort when I feel Tony stiffen against me. “Don’t talk to her like that!”
James winces and offers me an apologetic grin. “Sorry, Tony. I didn’t mean to offend anyone.”
Tony’s about to say something when I turn to face him. “Tony, calm down. It was a joke. James was just being silly.” I look up at him and bat my eyelashes.
He laughs and softens his stance. “I’m sorry. I just don’t like it when people talk to or about you that way.” He strokes my cheek, and I’m left feeling stunned by his outburst.
“Ana, can you help me with something please?” I jump at the sound of Jake’s voice and turn my head to find him waiting there expectantly. He looks just like the pissed off, alpha male I’ve come to know lately. Just when I have the other two settled down, Jake has to get in the mix. What’s next?