He'd spend the rest of his life alone, watching as Grace built her life with another man, had his children, grew old with him. That thought killed his erection immediately.
Grace, who’d been rubbing her abdomen against that hardness, took a step back. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he said. “Go upstairs and change, Princess. We’re leaving in fifteen minutes.”
* * *
Gideon parked in the almost full lot and shut off the SUV. He was nervous, his stomach a ball of tension and his palms slick with sweat. Grace was staring silently at the entrance to the carnival and he couldn’t read the expression on her face.
What if he was making a mistake? What if bringing her to the carnival just upset her and reminded her that her parents were assholes?
It was too late now. He’d made the decision and he’d live with the fallout if it was a bad one. But the look on her face when she’d told him about her desire to go to the carnival as a child had stuck in his brain and he couldn’t shake it loose.
He wanted to give her that experience, wanted to be the one who she could count on to give her everything she wanted. Everything she deserved.
Except you can’t be that man for her, and you never will be. Not unless you admit that you’re fucked up and need -
He drowned out the voice in his head. He didn’t want to hear it. Not tonight.
He wiped his hand on his jeans and reached across to take hers. “Grace?”
“You brought me to the carnival,” she said.
He squeezed her hand until she looked at him. “If you don’t want to go, I’ll understand but I hope you’ll consider it.”
She studied him. “I’ve never once gone to the carnival.”
“I know, Kira mentioned it. Will you give it a chance, Princess? I really want to do this for you.”
“Why?” she said.
“Honestly, I don’t know why, but I know it’s important to me. You deserve to go, Gracie.”
Her eyes watered with unshed tears and she looked away. After a few seconds of silence, she faced him again and smiled. “Let’s go to the carnival, Gideon.”
* * *
“Cotton candy is my new favourite thing.” Grace licked her fingers clean of the sugary sweet treat.
“Watching you lick cotton candy from your fingers is my new favourite thing,” Gideon said.
She blushed. “Gideon, keep your voice down. There are people everywhere.”
He grinned at her. “There are, and I’ll be sure to blame you when the whole town starts talking about the sheriff sporting an erection at the carnival.”
She laughed and tossed the now empty paper end from the cotton candy into the trash can. “Do you want to head back to the midway and play some more games?”
“And watch you kick my ass at whack-a-mole again? I’ll pass. Thanks for winning me Clarabelle though.”
“Clarabelle?”
Gideon waved the stuffed pink unicorn at her. “She looks like a Clarabelle. Come with me. I have another surprise.”
They walked side-by-side through the fair grounds. Gideon didn’t hold her hand or anything, but he walked close enough that his hip and arm brushed hers occasionally and each touch sent pleasant tingles directly to her pussy.
She stopped and waited patiently when another person roped Gideon into conversation. It had been like this all night, multiple people stopping Gideon to say a quick hello, or have a longer conversation about a problem they wanted solved. Gideon was friendly and patient with all of them, and she was again struck by how involved Gideon’s job was.
He'd apologized a few times to her and each time she’d been quick to tell him she didn’t mind. She was proud of Gideon and how well he did his job. She loved seeing how many people in their town jostled to talk to him, to be acknowledged by him with even something as simple as a head nod. It was obvious that he was well respected and liked, and she was nearly bursting with pride.
“Sorry, Grace.” Gideon pressed his hand against her lower back, urging her forward, and she missed the warm pressure when he dropped his hand. For a moment, she felt sorry for herself. Wished that she could kiss Gideon and hold his hand and show the entire town exactly how much she loved him.
She pushed away the melancholy. That Gideon had brought her to the carnival, that he cared enough about her to want to turn one of the worst moments of her life into one of the best, was enough for her.
“You getting tired?” Gideon said.
“No,” she said. “You?”
“Hanging in there,” he said with a small grin.
“You’re doing pretty well for an old man.”
He laughed. “With a remark like that, if your ass didn’t already have my handprints on it, it would by the end of tonight.”
She blushed again and Gideon’s flirty smile made heat blossom in her belly. God, flirtatious Gideon was friggin’ irresistible.
“Okay. You ready?”
He had stopped in front of the Ferris Wheel and she swallowed hard as she stared up at it. “You want to ride the Ferris Wheel?”
“Yes,” he said. “I want to ride it with you, Princess.”
“I want that too,” she said.
“Good.”
They stood in line. It was surprisingly short despite her suspicion that ninety percent of the town folk were at the carnival tonight. She supposed the short line had something to do with the fireworks starting in less than five minutes.
They moved steadily forward, and Gideon handed their tickets to the ride operator before stepping back. “After you, Gracie.”
She walked toward the metal bucket, feeling weirdly apprehensive. She sat down and Gideon wedged his big body in next to hers. The operator locked them into the bucket and returned to the controls.
She made a small ‘eep’ when the ride started with a jolt.
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” She smiled at Gideon as the ride stopped and two people sat down in the bucket in front of them. “Weirdly nervous, for some reason.”
“Have you been on rides before?”
She shook her head. “No, but it’s not like it’s a roller coaster or something. It’s just the Ferris – oh shit!”
The wheel jerked to life again and she grabbed at Gideon’s leg when their bucket swayed. He took her hand and linked their fingers together as the ride slowly turned bringing them closer and closer to the top. She stared with delight at the expanse of the fair ground, the glowing lights, and the tiny people walking through the midway. “It’s so beautiful.”
Around and around they went, Grace discovering something new to look at every time they were at the top. She knew it was just a simple ride but as she sat next to Gideon, his hand wrapped around hers, she realized it really was one of the happiest moments of her life. Gideon was happy too, she could see it in his face, see it in the way the tension that always seemed to lurk within him had disappeared.
She could get used to this. And maybe, just maybe, if she gave him a bit of time to adjust to the idea, he could as well. Convincing him that they were meant to be together, that Kira would be happy for them, suddenly seemed a lot easier. He loved being with her and she loved being with him. This could work, she just needed to be patient with him.