“Being responsible for another life can be a reason to get up when you don’t want to,” she said.
She had me there. “I was told the suicide rate among veterans who have support animals is lower than among those who don’t.”
“Is it true?”
“Again, just from my experience”—I measured my words carefully—”I’d say yes.”
“Sold.”
“It really might not be the time.”
“I can’t just sit here worrying.” She turned to me, her frustration evident. “Christ. He…he nearly—”
“Come here.” I pulled her in for a hug. “Shh. He’s safe for now.”
She pulled away. “Sebastian needs help, and I don’t know how much he’ll accept.”
“I agree. He’ll probably be resistant.”
“A dog’s not going to provide what he needs.” She shoved the tablet into her tote bag. “I’m grasping at straws. Why wasn’t I more proactive? Why didn’t I see how close to unraveling he was? If he was depressed, he should never have been drinking.”
“I think you’re probably right about that.”
“Some counselor I’d be.” She bent over, elbows on her knees with her head in her hands. “Thank God I didn’t go into the profession.”
Morrigan whined and nudged her.
“Don’t beat yourself up, Molly. He’s an actor. He’s probably great at hiding when he’s in pain.” Like a wolf, who won’t let anyone see his weakness for fear of predators.
“You saw it right away.”
I took a moment to think. “I sensed something was going on beneath the surface, but I didn’t know him well enough to call him on it. I should have pressed him about what happened Saturday.”
“He wouldn’t have told you.”
“That photo shoot was the trigger, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah.” Her phone rang and she glanced at the screen. “I have to take this. She walked a little distance away and took the call.
Morrigan and I stayed where we were. I wasn’t used to being the one on the bench outside the hospital doors. I was used to being the patient.
How many times had Serena gone outside to get a breath of air between visits? How many nights had my children spent with sitters while I kept their mother waiting on and worrying over me?
If I could do some good here—if I could help Alastair and Molly—I could stay. Except for missing out on baby Artemis’s first week, there was no one I’d let down if I did.
Molly came back. “Have you eaten yet?”
I shook my head. “I figure I’d just grab some takeout and head back to the motel.”
“Alastair invited us to eat at his house. You’re welcome to bring Morrigan. He has a fenced-in yard.”
Tempting because Morrigan hadn’t had a chance to run and play for a couple days, but dinner with Alastair Keye? That sounded more like a cross-examination with food.
“Maybe you should go with him, but—”
“I don’t want to go without you and Morrigan.”
“Why not? Is the man weird?” I asked. “Or handsy? Do you need a chaperone?”
“Of course not.” She punched my arm. “As if. I just want to watch what will probably turn out to be the most awkward dinner since watching you get to know Bast.”
“That wasn’t awkward. We got along fine.”
“You did, but I still don’t know why.” She picked up her tote.
“Because he’s beautiful, and I’m…this?” I asked. “Because I’m light-years older. His dad is probably younger than me.”
“He is not. Anyway, that’s not what I’m talking about. Sebastian doesn’t talk to people anymore. If he does, he’s rarely honest. With you, he doesn’t deploy countermeasures. You know what I’m talking about. You connected.”
“That’s fair.”
“So you’re coming to dinner?”
Alastair emerged from the hospital and headed our way. He was definitely as striking as Sebastian—uniquely stylish with an arrogant swagger I envied.
“This must be Morrigan.” Alastair kept his hands at his sides. “Stone, will you introduce me?”
“Morrigan,” I called. She gave me her attention. “Go make a friend.”
She stepped over to Alastair cautiously because unlike Sebastian, who was unconsciously friendly with dogs, Alastair was reserved. He might have seemed unyielding, but to his credit, Alastair squatted next to her and waited until she gave him a good sniff before lifting his hands, palms up. It was amazing how many people would just lean over Morrigan and try to wrap their arms around her. They assumed she was open to that sort of thing because she was an emotional support animal. But Morrigan was a five-star general with four feet. Her job was always to protect me, so anyone grabbing her met with resistance and an unhappy, hundred-pound dog.
Alastair was patient. I knew by the end of the night they’d be friends. Maybe not buddies, like Morrigan and Sebastian, but they would be respectful and pleased with each other.
“Oh, you’re a beauty, aren’t you?” He glanced up at me, eyes shining. “She likes me.”
I nodded, throat dry. Hadn’t Sebastian said the same thing?
He stood. “I hope you’re coming to dinner.”
“Thank you for the invitation, but—”
Molly grabbed my arm. “We’d love to. Thanks.”
Alastair gave Morrigan’s neck one last pet before brushing her fur from…everywhere. Her fur had gotten everywhere. He laughed.
“We can take my car. I’ll bring you both back to the hospital in time to say good night to Bast.”
Before I knew it, I’d gotten Morrigan’s seatbelt harness from my rental and strapped her beside me in the back of a Bentley. Morrigan looked relaxed and classy staring out the window as the scenery rolled by.
Molly kept the conversation going with Alastair acting charming and stuffy. I gave one-word answers and wished I was anywhere else.
Are you dating my son?
We were friends.
I’d only met Sebastian a few days before, and we were friends.
I had fed him. Draped a blanket over him. Put socks on him. In essence, done everything for him I’d learned to do for my wife when she’d borne our children and for my kids when they’d had the flu.
Was I going crazy, or did Sebastian already mean more to me than I was comfortable admitting, even to myself?
Are you dating my son?
I couldn’t answer that question without another question:
What would happen if I did?
Chapter Fourteen
Bast
Curiouser and curiouser.
Like Alice, I’d certainly fallen. I believed I’d fallen off a cliff. Who knew I’d also gone down a rabbit hole from which I couldn’t extricate myself?
If my dad had his way, there would be doctors and more doctors to ferret out my state of mind the night I got hurt. That was a long time coming but still, uncomfortable. Since the incident, the investigation afterwards, the court battles, and the eventual settlement, I hadn’t gotten a single full night’s sleep. I wasn’t lying when I said I’d binged a lot of Asian dramas and anime—my preferred way of killing time—ever since.