“Yes. That is clearly my point.”
“I promise. If you won’t either.”
Smiling cheekily up at him, she shook her head. “Impossible. I’m never an asshole.”
He snorted. “True. But, we agree. This is for real. A couple before and after. Sex and friends and all the rest of it. Even if you live in New York and I live here?”
His head nodded in affirmation. “Doesn’t it make you nervous? Starting out with so much stacked against us?”
“Yes. But the best part is this is my actual home. It’ll work out. Everything will. I really believe that.”
“Optimistic much? Glass always half full not half empty?”
She gave him a short negative nod. “No. Grateful just to have a glass; doesn’t matter if nothing is in it.”
He shut his eyes and let out an exaggerated, dramatic sigh. “Oh, lord. Nothing ever bad happens to you, huh? The glass for me usually breaks before I can see what’s in it.”
“So, between the two of us, maybe we can keep the glass filled.”
“What? Yin and yang balancing each other?”
“Yes. Why not?”
The tiniest smile illuminated his face. “Yeah. Why not? Don’t stress about what might be, like you never do, right? We’ll live now for today. The rest will take care of itself?”
“Don’t belittle my optimism. What if your ranch is where I choose to raise my mythical babies someday?”
“I guess I’m thinking ahead again as in a year or so. But yeah. I don’t think we should go into something blindly, especially when we have all the information we do. We can’t ignore the value of what those differences might lead to.”
She tightened her arms instead of releasing him. Leaning the side of her face against his chest, she almost whimpered like a puppy. “I don’t do it as blindly as you think. In the present, wherever I am, whatever I’m doing, I try to make really good, informed choices for myself and yes, do what feels good. Nice. Whatever. But I keep an eye towards the future as far as being aware of how today’s choices might affect or alter tomorrow’s choices.”
“And if they clash?” He leaned back far enough to see her face. Her eyebrows were raised when she looked back at him. The east coast clashed with Asher’s choice to stay here, but other lifestyle choices also tended to push them apart.
“Then I just hold my breath and take a flying leap.” She kept her eyes glued on his.
He didn’t flinch. She could almost see his brain processing her words and analyzing them. “I’ve never done such a thing. I’m too practical and focused and goal-oriented.”
“What about now? Do you feel like taking a flying leap with me?”
His gaze started on her forehead and he seemed to be memorizing every feature of her face. When he got to her chin, his eyes stayed on her mouth until he finally looked back into her eyes. Staring hard, she wondered what he was thinking and feeling because she saw something in his reflection that was deep and visceral. To him, it was a huge deal.
“When I’m away from you, I have everything sorted out. It doesn’t matter that we can’t be together or make it anything real. We could have sex without consequences. We could do it while you were home. Nothing serious. I have it all worked out. Until… I see you. Or hear your voice. The thousands of miles between us are suddenly irrelevant. It destroys all of my resolve and that’s never happened to me before.”
“Then you get how different this is.” She finally just spelled it out for him. Goal-oriented planner that he was, Asher couldn’t recognize his own feelings.
“Different. As in more.”
“More. We are going to spend more time together,” she parroted, restraining an amused smile. She was ready to melt all over him despite his utter cluelessness in handling deep, undeniable emotions. His logic might derail them before they even got started. Spending half her life admiring his practical intelligence, now she had to teach him to give voice to his feelings and allow them the chance to breathe and exist.
“But you’re not worried over how that future looks?”
“Not right now. Maybe in a week or during summer when I’m back home again.”
“Summer. What if we do this and things get worse? Missing each other, I mean?”
“We probably will. But we’ll do it anyway.” She shrugged to portray her casualness and intent to do so.
“Just like that?”
“Just like that. We’re together and that’s how it has to happen. I, for one, will value the time we have together in whatever medium it exists by fully jumping in.”
“Fully jumping in.” Repeating it to himself, Asher lifted his chin and met her gaze with a firm nod. “I’m in too. No telling which way it goes.”
She reached up and touched his jaw. “Because you like me so much? I’m so hot, you can’t keep your hands off me? I’m so witty, I take your breath away? I’m so amazing, you can’t go another day without my delicious glory fulfilling you? Don’t forget to add that part.”
The serious set of his mouth finally snapped. “You really are the most spoiled brat.” But his instantaneous grin diluted the sharpness of his words.
“Don’t I know it.”
His smile vanished and he lowered his mouth towards hers, his hands tightening around hers. “Now can I do all the things I wanted to do to your body before you decided to so exuberantly hug me?”
“Yes.” Her breathless tone would have embarrassed her with anyone else in any other moment. It was so cliché. Hopeful. Needy. But oh, all those things were swirling inside her. “And get used to my hugging. I like it.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“I could never casually hug you growing up. It was always hands off. I’d nearly shake when you were around me. I couldn’t imagine breaking the invisible wall around you to actually touch you. Friendly or otherwise.”
“Really? You really thought about things like that around me?”
“Yes. My nerves used to terrify me. They are only marginally better at this moment.”
“Can I tell you two secrets?”
“As long as it’s not a secret harem of girls and/or guys hidden on the premises.”
A smile touched his lips. “No. But I’m pretty full of nerves, myself, and the second one is: I want to hug you a bunch now too. That felt pretty good.”
She reached up and tightened her arms around him before he interrupted her, putting his mouth on hers. Still smiling, Daisy took a moment to fully feel the soft pressure. The perfect amount of wetness made her instantly forget about hugging when passionate desire reared its glorious head. She moaned on his lips and his mouth opened before his tongue, oh-so-gently grazed her lips. He imagined himself an explorer discovering a new island. Then his tongue filled her mouth and all thoughts of hugs, rainbows, teddy-bears and fun fled in a poof. Thoughts of lace, red lipstick, and all things hot and sex filled her mind. That quickly. The change thrilled her.
It was exhilarating.
His hands stayed on her waist for a long while as they kissed back and forth. Sliding her tongue over his lips, she loved it when his tongue welcomed hers and aggressively dived into her mouth. She melted and pulsated with all the wonderful, hot feelings his kiss released in her guts. They drowned each other with lips and mouths while twisting their heads in extraordinary ways. Their torsos attracted each other like magnets until the minutes of making out overheated her and she had to peel off the clothing layers she wore. She slid her hat off first before grabbing the waistband of her black ski pants. Their mouths never lost contact as she easily undid the clasp and let them fall to her feet. It took a little more finesse before she could wiggle her feet out of them. But damn. Their mouths never parted.