“Did you sneak off for a morning interlude with my brother?” Stella demanded, trying to sound indignant but too amused to carry it off.
Zeph rolled her eyes at herself. “It turns out I couldn’t live without him for one night after all. Don’t tell anyone or you’ll ruin my reputation as a scandalous flirt.”
“That’s really lovely,” Stella said, meaning it with all her heart. “I’m truly so happy for you both.”
“I know you are,” Zeph replied, very serious now. “And I appreciate your blessing more than you could possibly know.”
Stella did know, because Zeph’s mind and heart were more open to her than most. Zeph’s free-spirited nature meant she had nothing to hide. Though others didn’t see past Zeph’s lighthearted demeanor, her devotion to Astar and his happiness had never been in question for Stella.
“That’s part of why I’m returning the favor,” Zeph said, quickly checking the hallway once more. “Come with me.” Zeph led Stella back down the hall and into an empty room.
Favor? “What is the mystery?” Stella asked, intrigued.
“All right, I didn’t tell you this, but: Jak told Astar that he’s in love with you, and Astar tentatively agreed to let Jak court you on the condition that you tell him that you welcome Jak’s suit. Astar is going to talk to you about it sometime this morning, and Jak gave his word of honor not to talk to you about it first.”
“He… they… they what?” Stella groped for some place to start.
Zeph nodded in sympathy. “It’s a lot. Which part do you want me to repeat?”
“Let’s start with the part where you’re not supposed to tell me this. I assume Astar confided in you and you promised not to say anything.”
“I did not promise,” Zeph corrected, holding up a finger. “He just told me not to tell anyone and proceeded to tell me the story and asked for my opinion.”
“Zeph…”
“You’re my friend, too,” Zeph retorted. “My opinion is that you should know they were discussing you. And at the risk of being accused of trying to bias the betting pool, I wanted you to be forewarned, so you’ll know to tell Astar yes, you do want Jak to have the opportunity to court you.”
Stella opened her mouth, and Zeph wagged her finger in Stella’s face. “I know you, Nilly. Your first instinct will be to tell Astar no. That way you can weasel out of dealing with Jak, and you’ll have your bearish twin to enforce the edict.”
Slowly closing her mouth, Stella had to admit that option had appeal. Her friends meant well, but she and Jak could never have a relationship. It would be better for them both if Jak faced that reality now. She shouldn’t have encouraged him in the carriage, shouldn’t have succumbed to the temptation of… The memory gave her heated shivers, and she firmly banished it. “It would be easier that way,” she told Zeph gravely.
Zeph fisted her hands on her hips. “I knew it! Easier isn’t necessarily better, Nilly. I know dealing with our emotions is a trial to you, but unless you plan to hide away and be a hermit in some secluded tower, then—” She broke off with an incredulous lift of her brows. “You are considering that?”
“I’ve seen my own future,” Stella replied simply. “Besides which, it’s a logical solution for me.”
Zeph waved that off. “We both know the future is fluid, subject to change according to our will, our choices. Maybe this is a crossroads for you. This could be your opportunity to open up the possibility for a different future.”
That had never occurred to Stella. She’d lived so long with the image of that tower in the field of lilies, her life path ending there, that it seemed impossible anything else could be real. “But I’ve seen—”
“You’ve seen the future that results from your current decisions,” Zeph interrupted, gríobhth sharpness in her eyes. With a deep breath, she softened. “Stella, back at Elderhorst, you said some things to me. When I’d been so convinced that I should let Astar go because I would make a terrible high queen, you said otherwise, remember?”
“I remember.” Maybe she was reacting to Zeph’s intense emotions, but her eyes filled with tears. Zeph had been so determined to be noble and unselfish that she couldn’t see the truth.
“You opened my eyes to the possibility of a different life for myself, so I owe it to you to do the same. Don’t seal yourself off in a tower. Let’s find ways for you to live among the people who love you. That includes Jak.”
Stella wiped away the tears. “Jak isn’t really in love with me. It’s lust, a passing fancy born out of youthful obsession.”
“Sounds like me until not long ago,” Zeph observed wryly, then she sobered. “If that’s all it is, what’s the harm? That’s what courtship is: testing the waters.”
“This sounds very like the advice that got Gen in bed with odious Henk,” Stella felt compelled to point out.
To her credit, Zeph winced. “A fair point, and I know I need to make amends for that. It kills me that she picked that guy. In my defense, when I suggested she play the field instead of looking for true love, I didn’t imagine she’d go to bed with the first asshole to smile at her.”
“Gen can be impulsive in unpredictable ways,” Stella conceded. “And I don’t think you bear any responsibility for it. She made the choice.”
“Even though I goaded her into it?” Remorse oozed off of her.
“Like you’re goading me now?” Stella asked with arched brows.
Zeph looked aghast, then chagrined. “You’re right. I’ve learned nothing.”
“You just want your friends to be happy,” Stella replied kindly. “I can see your heart, Zeph, and there’s no malice in it. We are just not all quite as… fierce as you are.”
“I don’t necessarily feel fierce,” Zeph muttered, dark emotions passing through her as swiftly as the chilling shadows cast by clouds on an otherwise warm spring day. Lena wasn’t the only one suffering the trauma of their harrowing adventure. It helped that Zeph enjoyed the bloom of falling in love with Astar, but her sunny nature could be deceptive.
“Anytime you want to talk about it, about anything,” Stella said as gently as she could, “I’m here for you.”
“I know.” Zeph smiled at her a bit mistily. “You’re always here for all of us. Perhaps to your detriment, as you spread yourself very thin sometimes. You deserve to have something for you. Which is why I want you to be open to what Jak is offering.”
Stella had to laugh. “You, my friend, are relentless!”
Zeph smiled, an afterimage of her gríobhth beak, shining and lethally curved, in it. “It is in my nature, I suppose.”
“Very much so. Which is one of the many reasons you’ll make an excellent high queen. Tenacity and ferocity will serve you well. Shall we go down to breakfast?” Stella turned to go, making Zeph catch up with her.
“What are you going to tell Astar?” Zeph hissed.
“I wonder if they have those flaky pastries like we had at the lake manse?” Stella asked. “Those were delicious.”