Shane’s voice was it. That was the match. Brandt needed to feel Shane come apart, needed his increasing groans and erratic thrusts, needed the way his fingers were digging into Shane’s side and the way he slammed deeper now, no more cautious movements.
“Cl—oh.” Shane made a sound like he was going to speak then broke off into a primal groan that Brandt felt roll through his own body, his thighs, his ribs, his chest, until the energy was too much and that bonfire finally ignited. Heat roared through him now as he came all over his barely-moving fist.
“Fuck. Coming. Coming. Shane.”
“Yes.” Shane thrust deep and held, tight enough that Brandt could feel his shudders. Brandt slumped against the mattress, not giving a damn about the mess and letting Shane worry about the condom because he was well and truly fucked.
“Damn,” he groaned as Shane landed next to him. “Did we really go at the same time?”
“More first timer’s luck?” Even Shane’s voice was warm and smiling as he dropped a kiss on Brandt’s shoulder.
“Fuck. If that’s us as beginners...” Brandt trailed off, chest tight. They might not get the chance to reach expert status. And he wasn’t ready to think about this ending, not yet, didn’t want to consider a world where they didn’t get to do this over and over again.
“Yep.” Shane stroked Brandt’s back, voice soothing but also playful. “We’ve got natural talent, but we may need a lot of practice.”
Some of Brandt’s tension released. Practice. That was it. Keeping going. “A lot of reps. It’ll take time, but we can do it.”
“I’ve got faith in us.” Shane laughed sleepily.
“Me too.” Brandt supposed that they needed fresh showers and to do something about the bed. Later. Right then, he wanted Shane to keep petting him while his brain raced with everything he still wanted to try with Shane, all that practice. Shane might be teasing, but he wasn’t. His body pulsed, an achiness that wasn’t merely the obvious physical effects of a thorough fucking, but a deeper ache of needing something he couldn’t even name.
Chapter Nineteen
“Rise and shine.” Brandt’s voice tickled the edges of Shane’s consciousness, the scent of coffee and something sweet further coaxing him awake. He blinked, then blinked again because there was Brandt, wearing the baby in the sling and carrying a tray with food. The sun filtered into the room. He’d slept all night in Brandt’s bed and apparently deep enough to miss the morning baby wakeup.
“Damn. Breakfast in bed?” Struggling to sit up, he rolled the kinks out of his shoulders. And if he was feeling creaky after their exploits the night before, Brandt had to be feeling it even more. “Shouldn’t I be the one doing that for you?”
His skin heated. They’d stumbled their way through a joint shower and remaking the bed before collapsing in it together, but Shane had a feeling that more experienced lovers might be a little more attentive.
“Ha. Maybe this is me being sweet to ensure you get more practice in.” Brandt waggled his eyebrows at Shane. He certainly didn’t seem worn out from the sex. And the fact that he wanted a repeat was even more encouraging.
“Hell, I’d give you more practice without the food bribe.” He moved so Brandt could set the tray down. Luckily, he was still in the flannel pants he’d grabbed before the two a.m. baby wakeup. Brandt too had found clothes at some point—cargo shorts and T-shirt advertising the skydiving outfit in Idaho.
“Well, I figured your voice might need something more than coffee this morning after the long gig last night. And somehow a glass of juice for you turned into pancakes before the diva decided she’d had enough of the swing.”
“Well, thank you. And thank you, Jewel.” He smiled at Brandt before dropping his gaze to the baby, who seemed both awake and happy in her sling. “Are you gonna eat too? There’s plenty here.”
“Let me grab a fork and my plate.” Brandt slipped away only to reappear moments later with his own coffee mug and plate. Shane helped him juggle so that he could set Jewel between them on the bed where she kicked her feet and practiced her smiles. This was almost unbearably cozy, both of them sitting up in bed, eating and admiring the baby, who was in an especially cute mood. She was heavier now with big chubby cheeks and plump little fists, which were better at grasping things by the day.
“Wonder how long until she can have some real breakfast?” Brandt asked.
“According to the book, another couple of months.” Of the two of them, Shane had done more baby research, but Brandt was better at winging parenting. And they’d both quickly figured out that babies had their own schedule. She might not be eating, but Jewel was definitely interested in their food, wriggling more purposefully than usual. “Look at this! I think she’s gonna flip.”
“See?” Brandt preened and lightly tickled Jewel. “My kid has talent.”
“She does. You gonna strap her in for a jump before she can walk?” Laughing, Shane bumped his shoulder before gesturing at Brandt’s shirt. Today, the memory of their jump was warm and sunny, not bittersweet, the last few weeks having mellowed him considerably.
“Never. Eighteen. I won’t talk her out of it, but it’s got to be her choice.” Brandt’s eyes popped wide as if Shane had suggested playing in traffic. Him as an overprotective daddy was too cute. “There’s other stuff I want to do with her while she’s little. Silly things...never mind.”
Brandt’s hesitance was also appealing, making Shane grin. “Come on. You can tell me.”
“Okay, but it’s sort of sappy. Like the sort of things kids get to do with their dads. Fairs. Amusement parks. Go-carts. Haunted houses. Fishing. That’s a dad thing, right?”
“Yeah.” Shane’s chest was so tight it was a wonder he could speak at all. And oh how he ached for Brandt’s younger self who hadn’t had much of that. And maybe a little pang for his own upbringing, where there had been adventures, but not a lot of traditional memory-making activities. “You’re gonna be great at this.”
“Thanks.” Brandt met his gaze, eyes more solemn than Shane had seen, like getting it right truly was important to him. And Shane wanted to see that, him taking Jewel places, giving her the gift of a dad who cared enough to put in the time. Right when his heart was almost too full to stand, Brandt’s mouth curved into a slow smile. “I’ve got some pretty good help right now, though. Makes it easier.”
Shane matched his smile, something tender and big and terrifying all at once passing between them. “You’re easy to help.”
The moment was too sweet. He had to look away, turning his attention instead to Jewel, who was still in the center of the king bed, between them. She was still kicking and wriggling, determined expression on her tiny face as she swung from her back onto her belly.