Just minutes ago I was pissed at him, but I'm over it now and would rather be hanging out with my cousin than alone in my room. I'm feeling sad about Riley and could use some company, and maybe some advice.
"Wait!" I race up to him. "Would you mind if I went with you?"
"You don't run."
"Sometimes I do. And I've been wanting to get in better shape."
He looks to the side, then back at me. "How about some other time? I don't want to wait for you to get ready."
"It'll only take me a few minutes. All I have to do is change."
He sighs. "Hurry up."
As I walk off, I turn back and see him texting someone on his phone. Was he planning to run with someone else? Is that why he was driving? To meet this person? I can't think of anyone he knows here who runs. None of the other lifeguards do.
When I go out to the garage, I see Brad's not in his car but in the driveway.
"I thought we were leaving," I say, meeting up with him.
"I decided to stay around here."
"Were you planning to meet someone?"
"No. Why?"
"I saw you texting someone."
He turns to me. "Okay, seriously, what the hell is your problem?"
"What?"
"Why are you spying on me?"
"I'm not spying on you."
"Monitoring what I'm doing. Where I'm going. What time I get home. Who I'm out with. What the hell?"
He's right. I AM doing those things. I'm worse than my mom.
"Sorry." I shake my head. "I didn't even realize I was doing it."
"You've been doing it a lot and I need you to stop."
"Got it." I pause. "So can I see your phone?" I laugh.
He smiles. "You're getting an extra mile for that."
"Extra mile? How many are we going?"
"Seven or eight." He twists side-to-side, then stretches his arms out.
"I'll be lucky if I make it three."
"You sure you want to do this?"
"No. I just don't want to be alone right now. The whole Riley thing is really bothering me."
"I thought you were feeling better about it."
"I was, but then I didn't see her last night and I missed her."
He nods. "Forget the run. Let's just walk and talk. Sound good?"
"Yeah." I hit the button to shut the garage and we head to the sidewalk.
Brad is taller than me and walks really fast. Keeping up with him feels like I'm running.
"So you missed her," he says.
"Yeah, and then being out with Tara...it's not like we didn't have a good time. It's just that Tara isn't Riley. Every time I'm with another girl, it makes me realize how perfect Riley is."
"Nobody's perfect."
"But she's perfect for me. Other girls just don't seem to get me."
"Maybe because you're not giving them a chance. If you're putting on some fake act to impress a girl, she's not seeing the real you. Riley gets you because she's known you so long and you're not trying to impress her."
"I wasn't trying to impress Tara last night. She's a friend. I've known her since high school."
"You went on one date. Give her another chance. Call her up and see if she wants to go out again."
"Why bother? I'm only here a few months, not even that if I get a job."
"Doesn't mean you can't date. You never know what'll happen. You could fall in love with Tara and find a way to make it work."
"I can't fall in love with Tara—or any girl—when I'm still in love with Riley. I shouldn't even be dating right now."
"Dating will help you get over Riley. If anything, you should be dating more, not less." He turns down a trail that goes behind some houses.
"Did she talk about me last night?"
"Riley? Yeah, a little."
"What'd she say?"
"She feels bad that you're hurt over what happened."
"But she hasn't changed her mind?"
"Nate, people don't change their minds about something like that. You either love someone or you don't. The heart decides that, not the mind."
"I just don't get it. I know she cares about me, so why doesn't she love me?"
"The best advice I can give you is to just accept it and move on."
"It's not that easy. I can't make myself not love her when my heart already does."
"It'll just take some time. Maybe it would help if you didn't see her so much. Being around her has gotta be hard."
"It is, but this is our last summer together. I have to spend time with her. And I want to. After I move away, I don't know when I'll get back here to see her." I check my phone. Usually by now Riley would text me a funny picture or ask what I'm doing, but she hasn't texted me at all today. "I'm starting to think I ruined things between us."
"How so?"
"Ever since I told her how I felt, she hasn't been the same. She doesn't text, doesn't call. She acts like she doesn't want to see me anymore. This morning I called her and asked if she wanted to go do something and she turned me down. That's the first time that's ever happened. She's always desperate to get out of that trailer and away from her mom."
"Her mom's not home."
"How do you know she's not home?"
"Her mom spent last night at her boyfriend's place. She's probably still there."
"Wait." I stop walking. "So it was just the two of you last night?"
"Yeah. Why? Is that a problem?"
I'm annoyed they were alone together, but it's only because I'm jealous. I wanted it to be me there with Riley last night, even if I was just there as a friend. What if she shuts me out and replaces me with Brad? I could see it happening. They get along well.
"She likes you," I say as we continue walking.
"Riley?"
"Yeah. Makes sense. You're easy to talk to and she's comfortable with you. She's usually nervous around new people, but I think because we're related, she felt comfortable with you right away."
He walks faster, making me quicken my pace to keep up.
"I'm afraid she's going to replace me with you."
"Replace you?" He laughs. "I don't think so. You guys have a long history."
"But things have changed. She feels awkward around me now. She obviously needed someone to talk to last night, but instead of calling me, she went to you. That's why she invited you over."
"You were on a date. She knew that. And you told her not to call you."
"I guess." I shrug. "I don't know. Maybe Riley and I are done. Maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore."
"That's up to you guys to decide, but I don't think Riley wants that."
"I don't either. I just don't know where to go from here. I feel like I fucked everything up."
"Just give it time." He points to my house. "You done, or you want to keep going?"