He nods. "Yeah. Mine's uh, not quite that bad."
"Go ahead." I bite into my sandwich.
"Well, you already know about my dad. His gambling addiction?"
"Yeah. Nate mentioned that."
"None of us knew. We wondered why he was always out so late, but he told us it was work keeping him at the office. My brother and I thought he was cheating."
"But he was at the casino?"
"Most of the time. The rest of the time he was with other women. Turns out the cheating part was true. But my mom doesn't know, so don't tell Nate this, or Kathy."
"I won't. So is it still going on? The cheating?"
"I don't know. Even if it's not, I feel like I should tell my mom, but my brother thinks we shouldn't. He says it's between them and we shouldn't get involved. I see his point. I just don't like my mom being cheated on and my dad getting away with it."
"This is your stepdad, right?"
"Yeah, but he raised me since I was a little kid so I just call him my dad. My real dad took off, never wanted anything to do with us."
"Kind of like Nate's dad."
"Except he still talks to him. Nate's dad was wrong for leaving like he did, but at least he acknowledges that. And he's trying to make it right. He paid for part of Nate's college."
"He did? Nate never told me that."
"Oh, maybe I wasn't supposed to say that, although I don't know why that would be a secret. Anyway, when I got back from college a few weeks ago, my parents were fighting nonstop. I had to get out of there. I feel bad leaving my mom like that, but I can't be responsible for her anymore."
"What do you mean? You're not responsible for her."
"She um..." He looks away, then down at the table. "She has some addiction issues."
"What kind of addiction?"
"Pain pills. Sleeping pills. Diet pills. She doesn't think it's a problem because all her rich friends do the same thing, but when she can't get out of bed in the morning, it's a problem."
"She doesn't work?"
"No, but she might have to if we find out we're broke. We still don't know how much money is gone. My dad keeps telling her everything's fine, but if that were true, why hasn't he paid the mortgage? He hasn't paid it in months."
"Sounds like my mom. Says the bills are paid when they're not."
"Exactly. See why I keep saying we're not that different?"
"And Nate doesn't know any of this?"
"Not the stuff about my mom. Or the cheating. And I don't want him knowing. Or Aunt Kathy. Kathy and my mom have always been really competitive, and knowing this would fuel that even more. I really need you to keep this quiet."
"I will. And hey, I'm sorry all this is going on."
He shrugs. "It's life. It'll get better. We just have to get through it. Or run the hell away from it like I did. You can do that too, Riley. Just because your mom's life is messed up doesn't mean yours has to be too. I know you want to take care of her, but then who takes care of you?"
"I do."
"But you don't. Everything you do is for her. If you weren't watching out for your mom, what would you be doing?"
"I don't know. I've never thought about it."
"Then do it now. Where would you be if you weren't taking care of your mom?"
"I wouldn't be living here. I'd go somewhere warm. Maybe Florida."
"Live near the beach?" He smiles. "Your dream?"
"You remembered."
"A place to live. A family. You didn't ask for much, and you should be able to have it. I just don't think you ever will if you stay here with your mom."
"If I leave, she could die. I can't let that happen."
"Riley, you're the one dying if you don't live your life." He looks down, then back up. "You don't think it killed me to leave my mom when her life's falling apart? God only knows how many pills she's taking to get through this. But I can't take care of her. If I do, she'll never get better. She has to figure out how to do it herself. Or my dad has to help her."
"My mom doesn't have that. She doesn't have a husband, or anyone else, to help her."
"She has a whole town full of people who know her. Someone here would help her if she really needed it." He slides his hand over to mine. "Riley, I'm not telling you what to do. I just hate seeing you not living your life because you don't think you can. I don't want you looking back years later wondering where the hell the time went and why you're still living in that trailer with your mom."
"I don't want that either."
He sits back. "If you ever decide you want to get out of here and make a fresh start somewhere else, give me a call. Wherever I am, I'll come help you. We'll find you a place to live, get you moved in. Whatever you need, I'll help you out, okay?"
I nod, feeling a rush of hope and excitement at just the thought of what he's saying. A life that's my own, without the burden of keeping watch on my mom. Being somewhere I want to be instead of stuck in this town. Having my own place.
Everyone else my age is moving on with their lives. Why can't I? Maybe I should consider it.
We have lunch, then stay there, drinking coffee and talking. Hours pass, which I don't realize until I hear someone mention the time.
"It's after four?" I say to Brad.
He checks his phone. "Four-fifteen."
"You need to go?"
"No, but I will if you have stuff to do."
"I don't. I just wondered if you had plans with Nate."
"We didn't make any, but it looks like he texted me." Brad reads the text. "He's asking what you said."
"We never even talked about whatever it was Nate wanted you to talk to me about."
"He wants to know if you still want to be friends. He thinks you're trying to ditch him after what happened."
"I wouldn't do that. I've told him a million times I still want to be friends."
"Then I'll tell him that." Brad texts him back.
"What'd you say?"
"I told him you still want to be friends." He sets his phone down. "I can't believe he asked me to do this. You guys have been friends forever. He should be able to talk to you himself."
"He should, but he doesn't like talking about stuff that makes him uncomfortable."
"Then you're not that great of friends."
"I'm starting to think that. I barely know you and I find you easier to talk to than Nate."
"I wouldn't say you barely know me. We've spent every day together since I got here. And I just told you stuff about my family that almost nobody else knows. We've also done things that people who barely know each other don't usually do." He smiles. "Well, I don't. I usually know the girl first."
"We could've done more if my mom hadn't walked in." My phone rings. "It's Nate. He's going to ask if I want to go out tonight."
"What are you going to tell him?"