I had a hard time myself, keeping it a secret, when I’d heard the disappointment and resignation in his voice. It worried me that maybe he was having a change of heart. That maybe he was realizing whatever it was we were doing wasn’t worth it any longer. It’s why I’d wanted to see him and talk about maybe officially putting a name to us. I wasn’t sure how it’d all work. I just knew how I felt about him.
I opened the rental car door and finally stepped out of the vehicle. Lights illuminated the barn, where the party was crowded and lively as a band played, the surrounding areas dark as I walked toward the party. My eyes immediately started scanning, anxious to find Billy and see the expression on his face when he saw me.
I’d missed him like crazy lately. And I hated how I hadn’t been able to talk to him as much with my new job—the job I wasn’t as in love with as I’d hoped. The people at the company weren’t nearly as good to work with as the ones at my previous job. And my new boss was a grade-A asshole. But I’d told myself I’d hang in there for at least a year, giving it my all, hoping things would eventually get better. Or, at minimum, that it would give me the experience I needed to hopefully find something else.
The music echoed through the air as I walked, nearing the party. I wiped my moist hands down my sides, my heart racing. I waited on the edge of the darkness, wanting to see him before he spotted me, scanning and scanning until my eyes finally landed on him. He was on the dance floor, holding another woman in his arms. Stumbling back a step, my chin trembled when I saw that woman was Lauren.
My lungs constricted as I clawed at the painful tightness in my throat. I’d always known that something like this could happen, that we could only carry on for so long before someone got too lonely and moved on. With another few stumbles backwards, I watched the smile on his face as he laughed and danced with Lauren without a care in the world. She’d whispered something in his ear and his smile grew as he nodded his head.
My phone rang in my pocket, and I pulled it out as I watched my heart crumbling in front of me. I answered it without thinking.
“Hello.”
“Hannah?”
“Hey, Lottie.”
“Hey. Where are you?”
“Um—”
“I swear I hear the music from the party through your phone?”
“Uh. No. I, uh…” I spun on my heels, running back to my rental car. “It must just be some weird echo coming through on your end. You know how bad the service can be out there.”
“Huh. Weird. Guess so. Hey, so I was just calling to see how you were doing. We hadn’t talked in a while and…well I know tonight…”
Sliding into the driver’s seat, I choked on a sob. “I’m fine,” I lied, closing the door and starting the car.
“Hannah?”
God, this had been a stupid idea. I don’t know what I’d been thinking, believing somehow we could make this work. Why would he want to when he had Lauren—among others, I was sure of it—to keep his bed warm at night? I threw the car in reverse, peeling out as I flipped it around on the dirt road.
“Hannah?” Lottie said my name again, the concern in her voice increasing. “Where did you say you were?”
I swallowed hard, doing my best to sound normal. “Headed to the airport.”
Chapter 18
BILLY
What the hell?
“Holy! Fuck!”
My eyes flew open and I shot upward with the shock of cold ice water hitting me, waking me with a start. I rubbed at my eyes, finding a pissed-off Leighton standing over me with one hand on her hip and an empty cup in the other.
“What is your damn problem? And how the hell did you get in here?”
“Tucker gave me the spare key. And don’t you dare start with me.” She glared, pointing the empty cup my direction.
“It’s too early for your shit, Leighton. Get out of my house,” I demanded as I crawled out of my bed shucking the wet shirt—thanks to my bratty little sister—I’d fallen asleep in. My head was pounding. I’d drank way too much last night, hitting the liquor bottle when I’d tried repeatedly to call Hannah, with no luck. I must’ve passed out on the bed, still in my clothes.
I wanted so badly to at least speak to her if we couldn’t be together last night. Maybe I was the only one who felt like the night had some sort of significance for us. I walked into my bathroom, opening the medicine cabinet in search of some kind of pain reliever for my headache. Leighton was hot on my heels, ignoring my demand for her to leave. Finding what I was looking for, I popped two pills in my mouth.
“You’re an idiot.”
“Shit, Leighton. Seriously. Leave. Whatever this is about can wait until later. I’m not in the mood.” I splashed water on my face before turning and forcing her out of the bathroom. I closed the door and locked it.
“Fine. But at that point it may be too late. And all this will be your own damn fault. And don’t think I won’t be saying I told you so,” she yelled through the door as I took a piss.
I washed my hands and flung open the door. “For Christ’s sake, Leighton. What the hell are you talking about?” I squeezed past her headed for my kitchen.
“Hannah, you moron!”
With my head halfway in the fridge, I pulled back to look at her. “Hannah? What about Hannah?”
“Ugh!” she grumbled. “She was at the party last night.”
“No, she wasn’t, Leighton. I’m pretty sure I would’ve known if she was.”
“Maybe you would’ve, had you not spent the last half of the night dancing and having a jolly good time with Lauren,” she deadpanned.
I slammed the fridge door shut, roughing my hands over my face. She’d better start making some damn sense. “Start talking.”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to do,” she said, jutting out her chin, crossing her arms.
I crossed my own as I waited.
“Lottie called Hannah last night to check on her. After seeing how distraught you were acting…you know, the first part of the night, before you decided to traipse around the dance floor with Lauren—”
I narrowed my eyes at her. She rolled hers.
“She thought she better make sure Hannah was doing okay. She doesn’t know for sure, because Hannah wouldn’t say, but she thinks Hannah was at the party. She heard the band through the other end of the phone, a car door slamming, and an engine revving at the same time as she saw someone peeling out of there last night. All Hannah would tell her was she was headed for the airport, but she didn’t say which one.”
I felt a tightness in my chest as Leighton kept talking, knowing everything she was saying was impossible. At the same time, I had the sinking feeling it might be true. If it were true, there was a good chance Hannah had seen me with Lauren and gotten the wrong idea. That would explain the unanswered phone calls and the lack of returned ones.
Sprinting back to my room, Leighton followed behind me. I scanned the room, then started tossing the blankets and sheets from my bed, searching for my phone. It fell to the floor as I shook out the comforter. I picked it up immediately, calling her number. It went straight to voicemail. Pacing the room, I tried again. Nothing.