“What’s the word, Elena?” Konstantin asked once more, tone not unkind.
“There’s no word.” I pulled back my head, trying to wrench myself free of his grip. “And if there was, what would make you privy to it?”
Something dark and horrible flashed in the depths of his eyes. It looked like something between wrath and envy, betrayal and greed.
I had to turn my head. Seeing that look in his eyes made every cell in my body flinch.
Konstantin released me but didn’t step back. “Maybe it’s my turn to be the guesser.”
I stepped away from him, hand scrambling behind me to open the door. “Go ahead,” I hissed, already stepping back into the hallway.
His smile was small. “Unattainable.”
Without saying anything, I turned and darted back to my room. I leaned against the closed door, hand to my racing heart and stuttered through my next breaths. Unattainable, unattainable, unattainable.
Through the mahogany, I could’ve sworn I heard Konstantin’s low and seductive laughter.
14
Konstantin Tarkhanov
I woke up with thoughts of my mother.
Remembering Yekaterina Tarkhanova was never pleasant, akin to sticking one’s hand into a pit of vipers. She had been a tense woman, a difficult one. Out of all my brothers, I had been the only one able to handle her and remain with my mind intact. It had made me her favorite and the center of her attention.
I had no idea why I would think of the women until I heard Nikolai’s voice through the walls. “Mama, Mamaaaa.”
I rubbed my face. That was probably why I had woken up thinking of that strange and unwell creature I had called my mother.
For a moment, I listened. I could hear Nikolai’s voice better than Elena’s, though his words were garbled with child-like speak. They were chatting about breakfast from the sounds of it, the word pancake thrown around a few times by Nikolai.
I turned and checked the clock. 5:06 a.m.
It would be a few hours until breakfast, which was probably what Elena was telling him. They talked for a bit longer until I heard the click of her bedroom door.
I was up in an instant.
Elena didn’t flinch when I snapped open the door, but Nikolai did. He grabbed his mother’s knee and yelped, “Mama!”
“It’s just Konstantin, baby.” She turned to me and paused.
Her eyes dropped to my chest, running over the exposed skin. I had slept in my boxer briefs in case I needed to stop her from leaving during the night, but they didn’t leave a lot to the imagination.
Elena went bright red.
I felt like a teenage boy, standing there half-naked. I was smug in my beauty and Elena’s reaction to it. It felt good to know that I was a thought in her mind, one that could conjure up embarrassment and heat.
After all, Nikolai hadn’t been brought by the storks.
And it was him who reminded both Elena and I we weren’t alone.
“Don’t slam doors,” he told me even though I hadn’t slammed any doors. It was said in the exact same way Elena would say it, which led me to believe Nikolai was making fun of his mother more than he was lecturing me.
“You’re right,” I agreed. “We don’t slam doors.”
Elena rolled her eyes. “We’re not leaving, Konstantin. You can go back to bed.” She lifted her empty hands. “See? No luggage.”
“So it appears.”
“Mama and me makin’ pancakes.” Nikolai stumbled over a few of the words, but I understood the gist.
“Sounds delicious.” I smirked at Elena. “Let me put some warmer pants on.”
Her eyes nearly bugged out of her head when she realized I would be joining the two of them. It was Nikolai who grinned and clapped his hands. “Lots of pancakes!”
“I’m sure Konstantin has other things he would rather do.” She gritted out, expression blazing with irritation.
My smile never faltered. “Nothing more important than making pancakes.”
“Lots!” Nikolai added.
“Yes, yes, we’ll make lots,” Elena muttered behind me as I stepped back into my bedroom.
I returned to the hallway with sweatpants on, which only made Elena redder. To punish me for her own embarrassment, Elena elected to ignore me and strode down to the kitchen, Nikolai skipping beside her. Every now and then he would almost fall or bang into something, but he always caught him and laughed jubilantly at his near miss with danger.
How much he reminded me of Natasha was painful. She had been the same as a toddler. Too smart but too young to do anything about it, so she had channeled her sharp mind into causing trouble. I saw the same problem with Nikolai.
The house was dark and quiet. Even if people were awake at this hour, we had an unspoken rule not to bother each other between dinner and breakfast. It was our time to be by ourselves, for the married ones to enjoy their spouses and the single ones to enjoy their sex lives–or lack thereof.
Nikolai ran to the cupboard as soon as we reached the kitchen, swinging open the door. I caught it before it hit the wall.
“Careful with doors,” I warned him.
Nikolai frowned at me. “You did it.”
I had and he clearly remembered. Evva was the same; watching everything that happened around her and trying her best to copy us.
Elena looked at me, expression smug. What have you got to say to that? You did it, too, she told me.
“It was an accident,” I told him.
“It was accident,” Nikolai pointed to the door he had just been rough with.
I tried not to laugh but couldn’t help the grin that snapped up my face. The madness that haunted my soul seemed to fade briefly. “You argue like your mother, has anyone ever told you that?”
Nikolai looked back at Elena, “Mama?” Then he returned to me. “Like my mama.”
“Yes, very much like your mama.” I gestured to the cupboard. “Pick out the ingredients you want to use.”
“He’ll end up making us all sick,” Elena pointed out when Nikolai went straight for the bicarb.
“Like his mama?” I asked.
She waited until Nikolai wasn’t looking before flashing me the finger. I choked down my laugh.
With our help, Nikolai gathered all the ingredients. I grabbed the stool that Anton and Evva used when they helped in the kitchen. It had a strict Not A Toy sticker on it, placed by Artyom before Evva could even walk. My son took one look at that stool and saw a jungle gym.
“Careful on that,” Elena snapped when Nikolai tried to use it to haul himself up onto the bench. “If you fall back, you’ll crack your neck open and I’ll have to clean your brains up.”
He shook his head. “Nooo.”
“Yes, it’s true, my wild boy.” She put a hand to her hip. “Then who will help me make pancakes, mmm? So, are you smart or stupid?”
Nikolai pulled himself onto one leg. “Smart.”
“Smart boys get their brains cracked open, huh? I don’t think so.” Elena tickled his arm and he snatched it away, laughing. “Now, are you smart or stupid?”
Then to my amazement, Nikolai placed both his feet on the stool and used it properly. With a heavy defeated sigh, he said, “Smart.”