To irritate Jessie, who I know was the most excited of all when we learned a movie was being filmed in our town, I respond with one word: What?
Then I finish making dinner and sit down to eat with my kids. Charlie finishes first, and bolts to do his homework.
This is as good a time as any to tell Peyton about Tenley, before she finds out from someone else. Or, God forbid, if she sees the picture for herself and then—
“Savannah sent me a picture of you and Tenley.” Peyton pushes her food around with her fork, her eyes on her plate.
Fuck. Every step in this conversation feels like a landmine. This is when parenting is the hardest. Some days I’m hanging on for dear life.
“I’m sorry you had to see that,” I start, taking the first step into the minefield.
“It’s not like it came as a shock, Dad.” She gives me a look that conveys how utterly hopeless she thinks I am. “You and Tenley couldn’t be more obvious.”
I bite my lip, not sure where to go from here. Movement in any direction could get me blown to bits.
Peyton saves me by continuing to talk. “I was mad, at first, but then Tenley showed up here, and…” Her cheeks redden. “…you know.”
As much as it embarrasses her, I place my hand on hers. “Parents don’t always know what’s right, and your mom and I are doing the best we can. I’ll tell you what I told Charlie, and if you have any questions you can come to me.” I look at my beautiful daughter. Her face is steadily losing it’s roundness, her cheekbones emerging and making her look less like my little girl. “Your mother and I love you more than anything, and you are the most important thing to us, okay?”
Peyton nods, brushing away her hair when it falls into her face. She’s ready for the conversation to be over, so I stand up and gently remind her it’s her night to do the dishes.
She parks it at the sink after mild and expected complaints, and I feel relief that although everything in this house feels different now, it is also still the same. I step out front and make sure the door closes behind me, then call Anna.
“You should’ve told me you were dating someone. I don’t appreciate finding out from the internet.”
“I didn’t appreciate finding you wrapped in someone else’s arms in the shadows at your parents’ house.” I regret it as soon as I say it. I didn’t call Anna so we could verbally spar. What’s done is done.
“This is different, Warner, and you know it. They’re calling you ‘the mystery cowboy.’”
Anna sounds jealous, but I know better than to point that out. She’d deny it, and it wouldn’t get us anywhere.
“An actress, huh?” Anna’s voice turns soft. “My parents told me there was a movie being filmed there, and the kids told me you’d been helping someone learn about ranching, but I didn’t put it all together. I’m surprised Peyton didn’t tell me who that someone was. I’m sure she knew.”
Anna sounds reluctant and suspicious, so I put that to rest immediately. “Peyton probably didn’t think to tell you. She wasn’t keeping something from you on purpose. What you saw in that picture is a recent development.” Mostly, anyway. Our first kiss, in that field after we saw the antelope, was a few weeks ago. But nobody else knows that happened, and it’s not something that needs to be made public.
“I don’t like it. Seeing you with another woman.” Her voice is sheepish.
The admittance feels good inside. Whether or not our marriage is over, Anna rejected me, and what once stung unbearably now only smarts periodically.
“I know what you’re going to say.” Anna rushes forward, not giving me a chance to respond, which is fine by me because it’s one hell of an awkward conversation. “You’re going to tell me I made the bed and now I’m lying in it.”
“Something along those lines.”
“I’m not saying we should be doing anything different, Warner. Our marriage is over. I mean, obviously. We’re divorced.”
“Right. So why did you think we should talk? That’s what you said in your text message.”
She sighs. “We’re co-parents now, so going forward, I think you should give me a heads-up when you’re dating someone. Don’t let me find out from my sister-in-law when she sends me a screenshot.”
I roll my eyes. I’ve never liked Anna’s brother’s wife and was more than happy to help them pack their moving truck when they left Sierra Grande seven years ago.
“Agreed. Same goes for you.”
“Agreed.”
The connection falls silent, and I find it amazing we have nothing to say to one another. I was by her side both times she gave birth, fed her ice chips and encouraged her, and here we are now with very little to say to each other. The dissolution of marriage, the unraveling of lives, is the most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever experienced.
A light turns on in the distance. It’s Tenley, stepping from her back door. Her blonde hair shines in stark contrast to the dark brown log walls, and above the tree line, the sky is streaked with hot pink and purple-blue.
I say goodbye to Anna and slip the phone back into my pocket, fighting the urge to stride across the small expanse of Hayden land that separates us. I want to pull Tenley into my arms and finish the kiss we started in my kitchen. But I don’t. My kids are home, and they come first.
I wave to Tenley, hoping to somehow convey all my thoughts. She waves back, then goes back into her cabin. I wonder why she came out at all? Maybe it was just to check on me.
23
Tenley
It’s not that I’ve been avoiding Warner, exactly, it’s just that it’s been three days since Charlie walked in on us in the kitchen and I haven’t gone out of my way to see him. We’ve exchanged text messages and talked every day, but I’m treading lightly. I’ve never dated a man who has children, and I need Warner to lead.
Tonight, there won’t be any not-exactly-avoiding Warner because Juliette has invited me to dinner at the homestead. With ‘the whole fam damily’ as she put it. I finished up on the set a little later today than previous days, because I’d had a later call time. I’m even more behind because afterward, Ari pulled me aside and asked if I could talk to the Haydens about letting a drone onto their property, for the sake of getting good aerial shots. What the empty Circle B ranch gives us in terms of setting, it’s missing in an actual herd of cows. I told him I’d ask, but not to expect much. Beau doesn’t strike me as someone who wants a tiny recording device flying over his land. Or Wes either, for that matter.
I have approximately thirty minutes before I’m due at the homestead and I’ve just stepped from the shower. I keep going over the conversation I had earlier with Morgan, on my drive back to the ranch from the set.
She called to tell me my plants were healthy, that Tate had brought by a box of my things, and that I was a dirty rotten scoundrel for making her learn about Warner through the gossip rags. I’d explained to her the timing of events, how quickly everything had happened, and she said she only partly forgave me. We ended the call with her promising to send me a picture of all my happy plants, and me vowing she wouldn’t have to learn about her best friend’s love life secondhand.