He chuckles. “Same as Nora. Now she’s writing a letter of apology that’s basically a letter telling them where they are going wrong.”
“She sounds awesome.”
“She is,” he replies. “She’s the reason I’m here. And you.”
“I’m not sure what you want me to do,” I admit.
“At the minute, the only women attending are one’s who want to keep in shape. That’s not what the class is about. My sister thinks I’m not getting the right clients because the women need assurance to attend. They need someone there who has lived through a trauma, someone who will make them feel safe and secure; to let them know it’s okay to be there.”
“Are you teaching the class?”
He smiles. “Yes. Landon scared the last class off.”
My lips twitch at that. “It could be your height.”
“My height?”
“I don’t know a lot about victim support, but my mum does. She volunteers to help other women. She’s also a survivor and recently, she talked more about it to me and she said it wasn’t as much men who scared her, or women, but it was their presence and height. If she felt overpowered, she would withdraw into herself.”
“Wait, isn’t your mum married to a Carter?”
I nod whilst smiling. I knew he would make that leap of logic. Yes, the male Carter’s are well-known for their unique ‘presence’ and can certainly be intimidating when they need to be. They are a force to be reckoned with. And aren’t shy. “They healed her.”
“I want my gym to be that for other survivors. I want them to be able to defend themselves or feel empowered by knowing that they can.”
I fiddle with my sleeve as the backs of my eyes begin to burn. “I want to feel like that.”
“Hey, you will again.”
I shake my head as I look up. “I’ve never felt it to begin with. I’ve walked through life with my head in the clouds. I had a family who would die for me, kill for me. I never had to worry about anything. Until now. And it’s made me realise how weak and naive I truly am.”
He sits back, crossing his ankle over his thigh. “I’m not going to sit here and tell you it’s not your fault. I think deep down you already know that. I’m not going to pretend I know who you are and say you aren’t naïve.” He pauses when a choked sound rumbles in back of my throat. He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “But the girl I saw drive into the car park of my gym is not weak. I saw someone who was in pain yet didn’t want to disturb her cousin because he was with his girlfriend. I saw someone, so scared and in pain, worry more about her cat. I saw someone who had just escaped an assault and managed to get to safety.”
I run my hands over my thighs, taking a deep breath. I can’t talk about this, not now, not with him. “I guess you are here to ask me to attend these classes?”
“No, I want to train you to help me run them,” he declares, and for some reason, he sounds more surprised by his offer than me.
“What?”
He nods, like he’s silently agreeing to something in his head. “Yeah. I want to train you in self-defence. The women need to know they can trust me and you said so yourself, my height intimidates people.”
“I’m not scared of your height,” I whisper.
His lips tug up but he quickly masks it, keeping a straight face. “It’s not just about helping them, or helping me. It’s going to help you too.”
“Landon already offered,” I admit, but I had said no.
“And why did you say no?”
“How do you know I said no?”
He grins and it’s nice. He’s nice. “Because he’s family and knowing him, he asked too soon.”
I tuck my hair behind my ears and his gaze follows the movement before he clears his throat, glancing away.
“Can I think about it?”
“Of course,” he tells me, and sits up, pulling out his wallet. He slides out a card and hands it to me. “My number is on that card if you change your mind. Or you can come Thursday at six as the gym closes early.”
“Thank you, and for this,” I tell him, holding up my purse.
He gets to his feet but pauses, glancing at the purse. “What is it meant to be?”
A giggle slips free. “It’s a monster unicorn.”
His lips twitch as his gaze locks onto mine. After a moment, he shakes his head and takes a step back. “Take care, Charlotte.”
“You too,” I whisper, watching him walk away. My pulse picks up as I step forward, then freeze.
You can do this.
I try again, but my feet are glued to the ground.
Just before he reaches the house, I yell, not knowing what else to do. “Wait!”
He pauses and turns. “You okay?”
“Thank you. Thank you for everything you did for me that night.”
“Any time,” he replies, before heading off.
The card creases in my hand as I take in deep breaths.
I can do this.
With that mantra in my head, I walk inside, ready to start baking the fourteenth batch of cakes.
CHAPTER SIX
CHARLOTTE
Books are life.
They are an escape, they are love, they are historic, and sometimes, a teacher without the voice.
Every day I get to surround myself with every type of book and it always makes me feel blessed. Most people don’t get to live their dream when it comes to work. In today’s society, you can’t be choosey if you want to survive and make a decent living. I’m lucky to have a head start. I wouldn’t own this place if it weren’t for the help of my family, and every day I cherish it that little bit more.
Carter’s Library is my favourite place to be.
Being back after such a long period of time feels comforting yet disconcerting at the same time. I’m not sure what I was expecting in coming back, but it’s like something has shifted inside of me. It seems to be another thing that thrives without me, just like everything else in my life. I shake those dark thoughts away. I’m not going back there. After the hospital, I had a lot of them, and I didn’t like how they made me feel.
I head over to the reception desk. Marlene, a new girl I hired a few months ago, smacks her lips as she chews on her gum whilst filing her nails.
A heavy sigh slips free. “Marlene, did you go over next month’s schedule like I asked?”
“Yeah.”
“And?”
She looks up with a bored expression. “And what?”
“Marlene,” I call out when she goes back to her nails. “How many bookings do we have?”
I rely on those bookings, and although Rita ran things while I was gone, there was only so much she could do.
“It’s all on the computer.”
She goes back to her nails, leaving me standing there gawking at her. I grab a trolley filled with returns and leave her to it. One day, I’ll find someone to work here who will actually love it as much as me. Rita is amazing, but she isn’t good with the kids. In fact, I’m pretty sure she despises them.
“Hey, Charlotte, you’re back.”
I turn at the sound of one of our regulars. “Rose— oh my God, it’s so good to see you,” I greet, pulling her in for a hug.