I sit up and lay my head on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around my shoulder. We sit there in silence for some time as he comforts me. “Thank you for checking on me,” I finally manage to whisper.
“Yeah, well, Beau paid me a visit today, and I knew he was headed your way eventually. Then, you weren’t answering your phone, so when I got off, I came right here.”
Realization that I haven’t had my phone for heaven knows how long and Mason hasn’t come home rocks me to my core, filling me with so much doubt. “I think I left it in the garage.”
“Why don’t you put Ivy someplace safe and grab your phone, then I’ll take you to dinner?”
“How did I get so lucky to have you as a brother? I love you, bub.”
“I love you, too, sis,” he says kissing the top of my head still resting on his shoulder.
An hour later my brother and I are finally being seated at a small two top at Kraver’s Seafood.
After my meltdown, Deacon helped me clean up the mess of memories I left in the garage. While we cleaned, he talked me through how to tell Mason about Ivy, then afterward helped me into the passenger seat of his suped up truck. Now, I finally feel calm enough to get some food.
“Fancy seeing you here,” a very familiar voice booms over the noise from beside us. Turning my head, I see the Davis brother that’s always been there for me. Sterling and I grew up in the same grade, and he’s probably the brother that was better for me, but my heart always gravitated toward the older Davis brother. Sterling was never more than a good friend or even a brother to me. That didn’t change when Beau left. Sterling never made me feel awkward.
“Hey, Sterling. You here by yourself?” I ask taking in his uniform clad body.
“Yeah, I’m on break and just picking up some takeout for the station house. You two having a good night? Sheriff,” he nods to my brother in recognition of his boss.
“Yeah, just catching up with my little sister,” Deacon says.
“Sounds like a great night. Say hi to Mason for me,” he says and walks off as his name is called.
“Will do,” I say and wave as he walks away. “How’s he doing?” I ask my brother. When Sterling decided to join my brother on the force, I was so afraid. One of the men I care about in harm’s way was stressful enough, I didn’t want two.
“He’s a good officer. I’m happy to have him watching my back.”
We continue through dinner with mindless chatter. We’ve had a lot of time lately to chat, so other than new wedding stuff there’s nothing important to talk about. It’s not like we’re going to discuss Baby Ivy.
As we’re finishing dinner and I’m about ready to unbutton my jeans because of all the fried food and another familiar face catches my eye.
“Cora,” I call out. Her hair is so naturally bleach blond it’s almost white—flowing as she walks through the front door. Cora’s the most beautiful girl I’ve seen outside of the silver screen. I swear, I’d hate her if she wasn’t so sweet. I’d probably never believe her hair was natural if I hadn’t seen her mom with matching white-blond hair.
As she makes her way to our table, I stand and give her a hug. I haven’t seen Cora in a few weeks. I’m pretty sure she was out of town. She’s grown up with money since her family is one of the founding members of Fairhope, Alabama just south of Daphne. Though, unlike her stuck-up parents, she uses her family’s money to do all these philanthropic tours through third world countries. I really envy her for that. I wish I could do more of the things she does.
“How are you?” she asks as we pull apart. “Hey, Deacon—sorry Sheriff Williams,” she jokes mocking a fake salute to my brother.
He chuckles and says hi. I think my brothers had a thing for Cora since she turned him down our junior year, but there’s no hard feelings.
“Are you just getting done?” she asks and Deacon’s phone chimes in his pocket.
“Yeah but grab a chair. We can sit and chat while you eat. I wanna hear all about, where is it you’ve been?”
“Cambodia,” she says, turning to look for an open chair.
“Here, have my seat. I gotta head back to the station for something,” Deacon announces, standing, and throwing some cash on the table.
“Is everything alright?” I ask.
“Yeah, just a scheduling problem, I think.”
“Oh, okay. Thanks for dinner.” I stand and give my brother a hug and whisper in his ear. “And thank you for knowing and not judging.”
“I’m always here for you, little sis.”
“I know. Love you, big bub,” I say and wave as he takes off.
For the next thirty minutes Cora and I sit and talk all about her work at a Cambodian orphanage. The more she talks, the more I envy her. Cognitively, I recognize there’s so much poverty in the world, but hearing it from her and what she’s doing to try and help I really respect her. She’s a force to be reckoned with and I wish to be that courageous one day.
We say our goodbyes and plan to meet up with Millie sometime next week to catch up and let loose. When I park in my driveway, there’s no other car in sight. Pulling my phone out, I have no missed calls from Mason.
Where the hell is he? I must believe if he’s not home and he hasn’t called. He’s got to have been pulled into a meeting that’s keeping him at work late.
Walking inside, I strip down and put my pajamas on. I have work tomorrow and I need to go to bed at a decent hour. As I lie my head down on my pillow, the exhaustion from the emotional rollercoaster I put myself through hits me and I can’t keep my eyelids open. Fallingl asleep to images of a beautiful little girl that has the face of an angel, glowing green eyes, and pretty blond braided pigtails.
Shooting up in bed, beads of sweat slide down my temples, and I can feel the damp cling of my shirt. Being back in this town is really fuckin’ with my head. I haven’t dreamed about my parent’s accident in years, but here I sit in bed drenched, hatred seeping out of my pores.
My father may have made the wrong decisions by getting in that pickup truck more intoxicated than the fermented cherries I had soaking for days in alcohol I used to eat like candy through college. But the way the town, the way Coach treated me was wrong, too. I used to take what he threw at me because of the pain my father put his family through and it took many years after I left to realize, Coach was just as wrong as my pop was.
But it was this altercation, this camp before my senior year that I realized I'd never be good enough for Callie. As much as I loved her, and no matter the hold she had on my heart, I'd always be the son of a murderer. There was no redemption for me here and I had to get away.
I quit the team the second we came back from camp. I said it was because of Coach and a part of it was. But another big part was I wanted to spend as much time with Callie as I could before I say goodbye. I'd ripped out my own heart to make sure she had everything she deserved and that was more than I could offer her.
It was the best year of my life. Better than any endorsement deal or multimillion-dollar contract. The time I spent with Callie, that year she gave herself to me body and soul, will forever mark my heart. No one will ever be able to touch the place that still holds a picture of my beautiful girl. Because no matter who she marries or how her life turns out, to me she'll always be my girl.