Yes, he went there.
He swallowed as a vision of Emmaline stripping off her bathing suit filled his mind, singed his eyeballs—and it wasn’t even real. Just a fantasy. He blinked, fighting to get rid of it.
Help. Me.
She exhaled and her moist breath warmed his neck. He froze, his lungs seizing, no air going in or out of him. Every muscle in his body locked tight from the horror of what was happening.
He was lusting after his best friend’s sister. A girl he had always thought he loved like a sister of his own. He didn’t want these unbrotherly ideas in his head.
Especially not when he was alone with her in a dark room and on a bed.
He inhaled thinly through his nose, telling himself it was okay. As long as he didn’t act. As long as no one knew what he was feeling. As long as his gutter thoughts remained buried deep. This was normal, he reminded himself; he was a guy, after all. The night had just been weird.
He swallowed hard and fought to regain his breath.
She started talking again. “I’m not wrong though. Nolan casts a long shadow.”
He tried to process her words, but his thoughts were muddled from the nearness of her. It was like she was speaking another language.
Her head shifted on his shoulder and he had the sense she was looking up at him.
He looked down and then quickly away, realizing that brought their mouths much too close. Her words finally penetrated, finally making sense. “Someday you’ll be glad you have a brother looking out for you,” he said diplomatically.
A brother who would kick Beau’s ass if he knew what he was thinking about Emmaline.
She sighed. “I know. I’m glad now, truly. I just don’t need him to be so protective. It’s suffocating.” She straightened abruptly, lifting her head from his shoulder and grabbing hold of his hands. “You can talk to him.”
“What?” He tried tugging his hands free. “No—”
“At least get him to lay off me about Hayden. You know her. Tell him she’s a decent person and not a bad influence.” She frowned. “I don’t need him getting it into his head to tell Mom that Hayden is—”
“He wouldn’t do that.” Beau was sure of that. It seemed gossipy and the height of judgmental. Besides, Nolan didn’t like to burden his mother. She worked hard as a surgical nurse for a hospital in town, and Nolan would take on the weight of the world rather than bother her.
“Come on.” She gave his hands a beseeching shake, her entire body bouncing in front of him, quivering with eagerness. He fought to keep his eyes on her face and not look down. “Nolan trusts you.”
Yeah, he trusts you not to check out his sister’s rack.
She continued, “Just tell him Hayden is cool. You knew each other when y’all were kids, right? She told me that.” Her expression turned sly. “She even told me you were her first kiss.”
His face went hot, which was a surprise. He was not easily embarrassed, but the idea of Emmaline talking about his first kiss felt too personal. “She told you that? You were talking about me?”
“Yeah,” she replied slowly, uncertainly, as though picking up on his discomfort. “It was all in the name of research. We were discussing good kissing, good kissers—”
“And I came up?” he snapped, before managing to even out his tone. “Well, then. Where did I rank?” He said it like a joke but inside he wasn’t amused.
Her hands softened on his, her thumbs stroking in small reassuring circles. “Good,” she replied in a quiet voice, as though he needed that assurance from her. “Not that I expected any less, but Hayden vouched that you’re a good kisser, Beau.”
His name on her lips felt like a caress. God help him, but her eyes moved to his mouth . . . and then he looked at her mouth.
How had he never noticed the perfect shape of it before?
Not that I expected any less.
So, she thought about him and kissing? That was . . . interesting. And dangerous, because he shouldn’t find it so very interesting.
They sat close. The aroma of chlorine swirled around him, a strangely heady and intoxicating scent—who knew? Maybe it just morphed into something else when it came into contact with her skin.
The air crackled between them. One spark and they could both go up in flames. He was sure of it. It would be so easy to ignite that fire. He just needed to dip his head.
And that would be a colossal mistake. Still, he felt his head inching down.
Alarms bells went off in his ears.
Abort! Abort! Abort!
He slid his hands free from hers and stood. He rubbed his suddenly perspiring palms over his thighs.
Emmaline blinked up at him, adjusting her position on the bed, and he wondered how all her movements had suddenly become so sinuous and so seductive to him. What was going on? Best to retreat.
He backed away. “You and Nolan will be fine.”
She angled her head, worry lines knitting her smooth forehead. “So you won’t talk to him?”
“Ah. Sure.” He nodded. It was easier just to agree. “Yeah, I will.”
She smiled. “Great. He listens to you. That will really help . . . because I’m not going to stop hanging out with Hayden.”
Translation? She wasn’t going to stop hanging out with Hayden and learning all her tricks on how to attract guys, which he was starting to think would only translate to misery for him.
As far as he was concerned, she didn’t need any lessons.
Beau already found her attractive.
Shit. This was bad. Really bad for him. The last thing he needed was for her to become more enticing.
Then he reminded himself that what he wanted didn’t matter here. In fact, what he wanted was totally off the table. This wasn’t about him. He didn’t control Emmaline. She was her own person. She could share her lips with whomever she liked. It was none of his business, and he needed to stop thinking about her lips—stop thinking that he’d like her to share her lips with him.
Nolan Martin was his best friend. Emmaline Martin was like a sister to him.
He winced. Maybe if he said that enough times he would start to believe it.
Lesson #20
Appearances can be deceiving . . . just like reputations.
x Nolan x
After Emmaline stormed from the room and Beau went after her, Nolan was left to deal with the aftermath: four girls staring up at him who he had just interrupted in the middle of kissing lessons. They had been practicing on each other. At the behest of Hayden Vargas, who fancied herself some kind of guru on the matter, apparently.
He winced. Actually, he guessed a lot of people would attest that she was an authority on the matter—if her reputation was to be believed. Not that he believed half of what people said. Or even the majority, especially now that he had spent some time with her.
Everyone always thought he was some perfect guy, but here he was, thinking about Hayden when he had a “perfect” girlfriend. Not all reputations, good or bad, were to be believed.
Still, when it came to his sister, he didn’t like to take chances. And he shouldn’t. The promise he’d made to his father left no room for chances.
Of all the things he imagined taking place after dark in his house, and all the reasons he suspected Emmaline had struck up a friendship with Hayden, this had never entered his mind. Sure, he and Priscilla had been pretty intimate, but never when anyone was home. Never would he risk his sisters or mother walking in on them. It would be an embarrassing situation all around. He would spare them that.