My heart leaps into my throat and I glance at the porch to make sure Walker didn’t hear her. Thankfully, he’s too busy clearing a path down the walk to the driveway to have paid any mind to us.
“I will,” I answer Mary and close the door behind me before she can say anything else too revealing.
Walker is probably in town in between contracts again. Next season when it’s time for him to leave, he’ll be gone again and that’s probably for the best. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.
He’s waiting for me at the end of their sidewalk, the chainsaw and his kit of supplies at his feet looking like some sort of badass cross between a doctor and a lumberjack. When I get close enough, I open my mouth to say the words that’ll put enough distance between us to keep us both in check, but instead he reaches for me in one smooth movement, then crushes me to his body for a kiss as long and steamy as a Florida afternoon.
Chapter Five
Walker
Past
When I wake up in the middle of the night, it’s to the perfume of her pear-scented shampoo filling my nose. It blots out the usual acrid tang of embers and ash and it’s so welcome, I press my nose into her hair and breathe deep. She’s like the springtime after years of the worst, coldest kind of winter. A cold so deep it almost burns.
She’s wrapped up in a little ball in front of me, her legs tucked up into her chest, her hands folded innocently in front of her face. Somehow, I’d wound up wrapped around her with my thighs pressed close against the backs of hers and my chest framing her back. It’s been so long since I’ve had a woman in bed with me, let alone falling asleep with one. I’d forgotten how comforting it can be to simply hold one with all their softness and curves.
If I weren’t such a fucked-up man, I’d put some room between us. Even though she’d come back to my place, she doesn’t know me. We’ve never met before tonight and I don’t have any claim to her. But that doesn’t have any effect on my lizard brain. All it knows is she’s sweet and smells good and feels like heaven in my arms.
Reluctantly, I regain control of myself and start to pull away. A hand on my forearm stops me. “No, don’t,” comes her sleepy voice. “It’s nice.”
“You don’t mind?” I can’t see her face to read her expression, but I don’t pull away.
“I hope this doesn’t sound as weird as I think it does, but I don’t get to do this sort of thing a lot. Like, the affection sort of thing.”
“I guess that’s a good thing to know.”
“Why do you say that?”
“That you won’t have some angry boyfriend chasing me down.”
She puffs out a little laugh. “No, definitely not. I don’t really have time outside of work to find any boyfriends, so you’re safe.”
I relax back into her, tightening my hold around her waist and pressing more closely against her slender body. “I’m the same way. I work a lot, and I’m gone too much for any real kind of relationship. Gotta admit, though, I do miss this sort of thing.”
“That’s surprising. I would have thought you’d have dozens of women falling at your feet. The whole sexy hero thing you’ve got going on must be pretty irresistible to them.”
With a snort, I say, “Sure, until they realize I’m gone for weeks at a time and can be called away at any second. When I am home, I’m asleep or training. Women don’t normally want to stick around when you don’t.”
There’s a moment of silence and then, “I’m sorry. That must be lonely.”
I lift a shoulder, then remember we’re in the dark. “It can be sometimes, but you stay busy enough to forget. What about you? What keeps you busy outside of work?”
“My grandma. She has Alzheimer’s. She has a nurse during the day while I’m at work, but I take care of her pretty much the rest of the time.”
“What about your parents? Siblings? They don’t help out?”
“My parents passed away when I was younger. They didn’t have any other children. My Grandma Rosie and Grandpa Jim raised me. Before he died, I promised him I’d take care of her. It’s the least I could do. They were wonderful grandparents to me.”
“Your grandma is lucky to have you. I’ve worked with patients as a paramedic who have Alzheimer’s. It’s not an easy job.”
“It’s worth it,” Avery says. “I couldn’t let her be taken care of by strangers, all confused without anything familiar around. She’s lived in the same place pretty much her whole life.”
“What would you do if you didn’t have to take care of her?”
“I’m not sure. I’ve never really thought about it. Grandpa Jim got sick right after I graduated. If I had to pick something, maybe teaching? I really like kids.”
I smile in the darkness. “Yeah? I could see that. You certainly had more patience last night than I would have.”
“You should come on Friday night all you can eat crab legs. It’s a madhouse.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“What about you? Have you always wanted to be a firefighter?”
My answer sticks in my throat. Clearing it, I say, “Pretty much. My brother was killed in a fire when I was ten. I guess I’ve been trying to save him ever since.”
“Oh my God, Walker. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s been a long time.”
“Still. I know how it feels. It doesn’t ever really go away.”
“No, I guess it doesn’t.”
She turns then, fitting her head underneath my chin. Her free arm goes around my waist and I freeze for a second, unsure. Then, I realize she’s giving me a hug and I relax, accepting her feminine strength. I nuzzle my nose back into her hair and let the scent of her shampoo comfort me as much as her arms around me.
I’m not sure who reaches for who first, or maybe we do it at the same time. But somehow our lips find each other in the dark and tangle. There’s desperation there, on both our parts. A need to fill a mutual void. A craving for similarities. To know we’re not alone with our struggles. She tastes like the vanilla from the coffee, almost too sweet to handle, but I can’t stop going back for more. Her groan fills me up and all I want is to hear her do it again and again.
If we only have tonight, then I hope tonight lasts forever.
Avery sheds her clothes as fast as a fox and then makes quick work of mine, too. “Is this okay?” she asks when she reaches for my sweatpants and I choke out a hoarse, “Yes,” in response.
I wish there were light so I could get a better look at her. I wish there were more time so I could sample and savor every inch of her. But I’m driven by a desperation to be inside her that’s so acute, all I can do is jerk her against my chest and lift one leg over my hip. She reaches between us and positions me, then takes me inside in one smooth motion. Her gasp of pleasure fills the darkness around us as I drive into her obliterating heat.
This isn’t how I’d planned for tonight to go. If I was lucky enough to get her into bed, I planned to make it last, make her come at least twice before we got down to business, but I’ll be lucky if I don’t go off embarrassingly early at this point.