Olivia wanted to feel sad. She expected to feel worried, too. Lily was sixteen, pregnant, and alone. But she couldn’t manifest any sympathy. Her tears were spent. She’d buttoned up her heart.
Less than a year later, she received her first annual letter from Lily. Inside the note card was a photo: Josh, his newborn face blotchy and puffy eyelids closed, swaddled in an infant blanket.
“Who’s Josh?” Amber asks, piercing through the fog of Olivia’s shock.
“Lily’s son.”
Amber stares at her before her mouth falls open. “Your sister Lily?” Olivia nods. “Get out.” Amber softly whistles, her gaze fixed on the boy rooted to the sidewalk.
Olivia snuffs out her Marlboro on the concrete step and stands. Amber joins her, setting aside her wineglass.
“What’s your name?” Olivia asks to be sure she’s right, that he’s her nephew.
Her heart beats faster over that thought. Nephew. Never in a million years did she expect to meet Lily and Ethan’s son. “Your name,” she repeats when he stares blankly at her. “Who are you?”
His mouth parts and after a few beats, he says, “Josh.”
She exhales roughly, feeling shaky. She shouldn’t have snuffed out her cigarette. What the heck is Lily’s son doing here? And where is she? Olivia looks in the direction the Continental went, waiting for Lily to appear like a desert mirage.
“Come here, Josh.” He doesn’t budge. She waves her hand, beckoning him closer. “It’s okay, come here.”
His feet shuffle as if he’s debating what to do. He glances from her to Amber and back. His hands tighten on his backpack straps and he takes a tentative step, then another. And another. He stops a few feet from them.
Now that he’s closer, Olivia hungrily absorbs his features in the waning evening light. Hazel eyes watch her closely, inspecting. A scattering of freckles dusts his nose bridge, same as they did when she and Lily were his age. Olivia covered hers with a thick layer of foundation during her tween years. She hated her freckles. They look sweet on Josh. He’s a good-looking kid. Reminds her of Lucas.
Jesus. Lucas.
Wait until he hears about Josh.
After Lily ran away, Olivia hounded Lucas for details about what exactly went down. He wouldn’t tell her. He flat-out refused. Ever since, they haven’t discussed Lily. The few times Olivia brought up their sister in conversation, Lucas retreated. He’d disappear into himself or he’d blow her off, ignoring her texts and declining her calls, which wasn’t unusual. Ever since he was sixteen and spent six months in juvenile hall, Lucas has been unreliable. Unpredictable, too.
Josh adjusts the pack on his shoulders. His mouth opens and closes and then he scowls, his nostrils flaring with a rapid expulsion of air. Worry wrinkles the narrow band of forehead under the bill of his cap. He looks at Amber.
“What?” she asks, sounding as confused as Olivia feels with his funky facial twitching. He’s frustrated about something.
He points at himself. “Josh.” He then points at Amber.
“Oh.” She smiles. “I’m Amber.”
He points at Olivia next.
“Olivia. I’m your mom’s sister,” she says. “Your . . . aunt.” She struggles with the title. It’s the first time she’s ever referred to herself that way.
The tension in Josh’s expression eases instantly. His eyes rapidly blink and Olivia worries he’ll burst into tears. As much as she hates who his parents are, she wants to bundle him up and tell him he’s safe with her.
Amber thrusts out her hand. “I’m your aunt’s friend. Nice to meet you, Josh.”
He doesn’t reach for Amber’s palm, just stares at it. Olivia’s chest tightens with worry. Why is he here alone?
“Where’s your mom?” she asks.
“I . . .” He stalls.
“Who’s that woman who dropped you off?” Olivia looks toward the end of the street again, miffed the lady took off without telling her when Lily would be here, or how long Josh intended to stay.
Josh shrugs.
“You don’t know where she is?”
He extends his arm, thumb out. Does he mean what she thinks he means? He hitchhiked his way here? That would explain why Lincoln Continental lady drove off without an explanation. But does Lily know? What if Josh ran away from home?
Wouldn’t that be the icing on their dysfunctional family cake? Josh ditching his mom like Lily ran away from them.
Josh’s feet shuffle. He looks around her yard, his gaze landing on the front door.
“Why did you come here?” To her house of all places. They’ve never met.
Josh looks at the ground.
“Is there anything you want to tell me?” she asks. How long is he staying? Where does he plan to go? What’s she supposed to do with him? Why the hell isn’t he talking? She snaps her fingers below his face. “Josh. Where is your mom?”
“Gone.”
Gone? What’s that supposed to mean?
“Did she leave you? Or . . . Is she dead?”
Josh’s face pales, and Olivia has to fight her anger. How dare Lily die on her before she can beg Olivia for her forgiveness. No, not possible. Lily isn’t dead. Olivia refuses to believe that.
“Jeez, Olivia. Take it easy,” Amber whispers.
“Sorry.” She rakes her fingers through her hair. Nails scrape her scalp. She takes a breath, waits a beat. She didn’t mean to frighten him. What Lily and Ethan did was unforgivable, but Josh doesn’t deserve her rage. She tries again, tempers her voice. “Did your mom leave you?”
“Don’t . . . know.” He chews his bottom lip, his gaze shifting around the yard.
Amber nudges her arm. “You’re scaring him.”
He glances over his shoulder toward the road. Amber’s warning sinks in and Olivia swears. “Hey, it’s okay. Everything’s cool. Why don’t you come inside? You can hang out until your mom gets here.” She gives Amber a what-am-I-supposed-to-do-with-him look.
Amber comes to her rescue. “Are you hungry, Josh?”
Josh looks at Amber with interest.
“Do you want something to eat?” she clarifies.
“Yes.” He looks eagerly between them and mimes eating a hamburger.
“The kid wants a burger.”
Olivia taps her finger on her thigh. She wants a smoke. She also needs food. She’s been working on deadline and aside from spoiled takeout, her fridge is bare. “Sorry, Josh.” She hates to disappoint him. “I don’t have—”
“Yes, she does,” Amber interrupts with a big smile. “Aunt Olivia has hamburgers.”
“I do?”
“DoorDash. He’s had a long day. Haven’t you?” Josh frowns, cocking his head, then nods. Amber elbows Olivia’s ribs. “Give him what he wants. He’ll feel much better after.”
“All right then. Today’s your lucky day.” In more ways than she can count. Because by some miracle or fluke, her thirteen-year-old nephew found her.
CHAPTER 4
Olivia invites Josh to follow her and Amber inside the house. He wanders into the living room, scratching his head, leaving the cap askew, the bill tilted. His gaze pans from the floor to the ceiling and along the walls, absorbing everything in between.