“Smokey, stop doing this. I’ve already made my decision. When I find the right place, I’m going to leave. It’s the right thing to do. I don’t want to be here anymore.”
“I’ll keep my distance until you can bear to see me again.”
“You lived here first.”
“And you fell in love with the place. Ava, I don’t want you to go.”
He saw her eyes glisten with tears.
“It’s not your decision, and it will never be yours to make. I’m already looking for potential buyers for the bakery, and then I’m going to put this place on the market.”
“If you loved me at all, you’d consider the next moves you make, please.”
Ava stared at him. “That’s cruel even for you. I consider everything. Don’t you think I’ve thought of everything first? It’s what I do. You’re right. I loved this place. I’d hoped to make a lot of memories. Good ones, and you had started to help me build them. There are places I pass and I can’t help but smile.”
He took a step toward her. “Then don’t go. Please, don’t fucking go.”
“You’re not the boss of me, Smokey. Two weeks ago, I’d have given anything to hear you say those words. Those memories that were once sweet to me, they’re not dead. I can’t have them anymore. You killed them for me. There’s nothing for me here.”
“There’s me.”
“I don’t have you.”
“You’ve got all of me, babe.” He took her good hand and placed it against his heart. “I know you hate me a lot right now, and I get it. I’m an asshole, but you loved me. You still love me. It’s why it hurts so fucking much.”
She tugged on her hand, and tears fell down her cheeks. He saw the pain in her eyes. How her face scrunched up, the tension in her body. Gone was the women who loved his touch. He wanted her back so fucking much.
“Love you or not, Smokey. If I decide to go, then that is exactly what I’m going to do, and nothing you or anyone else says can stop me. Please tell Abriana I don’t want her at my home again.”
“Don’t shut her out. She was pissed off. She wasn’t bragging or trying to update me. It wasn’t like that.”
“Then what was it like?” Ava asked. “You’re telling me I’ve got to be friends with Abriana, yet the first thing she came and did was tell you. You want forgiveness. You and Raven, and the truth is, I’ve got nothing to give. You broke my heart.”
The last ended on a sob, and she took a deep breath as her body shook. “I would have done anything for you, Smokey. I still think part of me would, and that scares me. You had me beaten. I can’t even use my hand properly, and we both know you were going to bury me once you were done. Now you’re asking me to stay.”
“I know I’m being unreasonable.”
“Yes, you are, and unfair. We’re not together anymore, Smokey. You don’t get to dictate where I go. Now please leave.” She slammed the door in his face.
“I love you too,” he said, putting his hand against the glass.
Chapter Thirteen
According to the realtor, there wasn’t a lot of interest in buying a shop so small. Where Ava had found it charming, others found it really small. Her bakery was enough for a one-woman operation, and so one month after the attack, she still hadn’t found anyone to buy her bakery.
Then there was the trouble with her home. She’d loved the place and had gotten it at a bargain price because it had been on the market for so long.
They were living in difficult times and with those times, no one wanted to buy a place out of the town or a city.
She sat in her yard, drinking some fresh lemonade she’d just squeezed. The lemons had been on sale at the grocery store. They’d looked amazing, and she couldn’t resist a bargain.
Now with an abundance of lemons, her creative desires were in full flow. She wanted to bake. Her hand was improving. She’d gone for another X-ray and the doctor was happy with the improvements. He didn’t think for a second she’d need surgery and she’d be able to work with it within another month.
Not being able to do anything but sit and eat was starting to get to her. She didn’t want to stay indoors all the time.
The nice warm weather offered a slight reprieve, but again, it wasn’t enough to stop the itch to do something.
Eating ice cream had lost its appeal. So had eating herself out of house and home. It was why she’d ended up at the grocery store, and now back in her yard, drinking lemonade.
What she hadn’t realized was that there was a fair in town. She’d been so out of the loop with everything.
As she sat drinking, loneliness began to creep in.
Would it hurt for her to go and enjoy the fair for a couple of hours? To be around actual people?
She finished off her glass of lemonade and decided it was time to get off her ass, to go enjoy some other company.
Ava placed the jug in the fridge, changed from her shorts to a blue summer dress with white roses on the front. She called a cab because she didn’t like driving with her hand. She was taking every single precaution when it came to helping the healing process.
At the door, she gave herself one final look in the mirror. Most of the bruises had faded. The worst ones around her eye still had some slight mottling to them. Her lip had healed up as well. Her hair, she hated it. The hairdresser had done what she could to fix the hacked locks, but she missed her long hair. She’d gone out of her way to grow it.
Just another thing they’d taken away from her.
Squaring her shoulders, she heard the cab’s horn, letting her know it was here. She locked her home and made her way to the cab. Climbing in the back, she told him where she wanted him to go. He took her there without making any conversation.
Being in town, she did notice more people were trying to make nice with her.
The truth was, she wasn’t interested. After what Abriana said about his warning to them, she didn’t care to make friends that way. She’d rather people just want to be friends because they happened to like her.
Once the cab driver arrived, she paid him and gave him a generous tip. She climbed out, and at first, panic seized her as she looked at the large crowd. Not only was this a big event for the town, but several tourists had arrived.
When she purchased the bakery, she’d been told about this time of year. How wise it would be for her to participate. She’d been looking forward to it. Even planning for it when she first opened up.
All that time had been wasted.
Rather than dwell on the dull ache in her hand, and where there were once bruises on her body that seemed to want to come to life, she stepped into the throng of people.
Everything is going to be fine.
She had always hated crowds. Another reason for Derek to dislike her. He loved to go out and party. She loved to stay in.
Watching people was a favorite pastime of hers, though. Ava didn’t immediately get stuck in with enjoyment. She took her time. Observing everyone. The laughter was somewhat infectious.
After what felt like a lifetime, she started to relax.
She had clocked the Hell’s Bastards MC, and Smokey, in particular. She ignored them all.