I love her.
“I need your help.”
The Candlers, all sitting in their den, give me sadly expectant looks.
Holy shit. I’m doing this.
I clear my throat. “First of all, I won’t let you send me back in time.”
The lightening of the air in the room is palpable, a sense of relief and excitement.
“Oh, Trace,” Cassie says, her shoulders sagging.
“Why?” Felise asks. “It’s because you don’t want to leave us, right?”
I half smile. “Right.”
They all chuckle.
“It’s true,” I say seriously. “I gave this a lot of thought. I love all of you.” I cough. “I thought I wanted my family back, that I needed that to be loved. But you all showed me…” I stop. Fuck, this is hard.
“We love you, Trace,” Cassie finishes for me. “You are our family.”
I nod, my throat thick. When I can speak, I say, “Yes. And I have to thank you…” I meet Joe’s eyes. “For making me tutor Romy. I knew why you did it, and I was pissed, but… you were right. It was what I needed to restore my faith in magic.”
Joe smiles.
“So thank you. But there’s something I have to tell you that might… upset you.”
I’m greeted with blank looks now.
“Romy and I…” I stop. “I’m in love with her.”
To my complete shock, the women all break into smiles. Cassie murmurs something to Joe, who doesn’t look quite as pleased.
“We’ve actually been seeing each other,” I continue in the interests of full disclosure and honesty. They need to know. “For a few months.”
“Oh my god!” Felise gapes. “And she never said anything!”
“It was because of me. I didn’t want you all to know. But I—”
“What the hell!” Joe shouts, slamming a hand on the end table.
I jump, as does everyone else.
“You and Romy,” he barks.
Ah, fuck. I meet his eyes. “Yes. I know, I know.” I lean forward. “I’m sorry. She’s your daughter. She was off-limits, and I fucked up.”
“And you kept it secret.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
Oh. Clearly, he takes this as an insult to Romy. “It was my hang-up,” I say immediately. “Because she’s your daughter, and you’ve been like family to me, and I didn’t want to betray your trust.”
Joe’s chin jerks down.
“Because I don’t have any other family,” I go on. “I didn’t want to screw things up.”
“Oh no,” Cassie murmurs.
“I felt like I was betraying you and everything you’ve done for me by getting involved with Romy. But…” I straighten my shoulders. “I fell in love with her. And if I had to choose between you and her… I have to be honest with you. I’d choose her.”
Silence falls over us, dense and heavy.
“And if you want to fire me, I understand,” I add. “I’ll leave.”
“Fire you? Fuck no!” Joe stares at me. “Why would you say that?”
“I don’t want to cause a big rift in the family. I’ll find a job somewhere else—”
Joe holds up a hand. “Shut up, Trace. You’re not going anywhere.”
Joe and Cassie look at each other, then turn back to me.
“I can’t believe you would think such a thing,” Cassie says. “You don’t have to choose, Trace. I just told you. We love you.”
Relief spreads through my chest and loosens my muscles. “I don’t have a good track record with women. I never wanted anything serious. I thought with Romy it would just be… fun.”
After a few beats of silence, Cassie says, “I know you feel responsible for your family’s death. And that’s why you wanted to go back in time.”
“I am responsible,” I say quietly, dropping my head.
“It was an accident, Trace. There are some things we just can’t change. Even witches. We have to accept them and move forward. Is that what’s been holding you back from… women? You go out with a lot of girls, but you never get serious.”
I shift in my chair. “Yeah. Getting serious isn’t for me.”
“That is horseshit.” Joe rolls his eyes. “You deserve love as much as anyone.”
“Probably not.” I grimace. “I sort of screwed things up with Romy.”
Joe’s eyes narrow. “How?”
“We argued. The other night. About giving up her witch powers. She wanted to end things and I let her, because I…” My face heats. “I thought it was better for my chances to bring back my family. It was stupid. I didn’t realize how much I care about her.”
Felise’s and Magan’s heads drop forward.
“Oh dear,” Cassie says.
“I didn’t think that would happen with Romy. I didn’t think I’d fall in love. But I couldn’t help it. I knew I shouldn’t get involved with her, but it was like I was… obsessed with her.”
Felise gives a happy-sounding sigh. Even Magan looks weepy.
“And the more time we spent together, the more I fell for her. She’s… amazing. I need to tell her how I feel. And that I’m sorry for being an idiot. That’s why I need your help.”
Joe frowns. Cassie smiles. Felise nods. And Magan says, “Tell us what you need.”
26
Romy
I’m at the Singing Horse, waiting for Felise and Magan. They’re late, and I’m nearly finished with my first beer. I sigh.
I pick up my phone to check both the time and whether I have a text from my sisters. Nothing. I tap in a message to both of them. Are you two still coming? Then I drop my phone back on the table.
Propping my elbow on the table, I rest my chin in my hand and watch the owners of the bar, setting up for karaoke. Sadness forms a cold ache in my chest, remembering the night I met Trace here.
I remember the second time I met him here, when he encouraged me to be brave enough to believe in magic. And I thought he was putting a spell on me. Ha.
I shouldn’t be sad. I love him, and we had so much fun together. We also had deep witch discussions. He supported me through all the mayhem I created with the Board of Elders. I’ll always have that even if he’s not in this life anymore. And I’ll always know that he has his family back.
But I am sad, even though I think that’s selfish. I want him in my life. But more than anything, I want him to be happy.
One of my first lessons from Trace was that I can’t use my power to interfere with life lessons, like heartbreak. I just have to endure this. Be strong enough to get through it.
The door of the bar opens, and I glance over to see if it’s Felise and Magan.
Trace walks in.
My heart lurches to a stop. What is he doing here?
His gaze lands on me. He starts toward me.
I watch his long stride. He’s dressed in worn jeans and a black shirt, with a loose khaki jacket over them. His beard stubble is heavier than usual, and his green eyes are shadowed, giving him a dark and moody air. He stops at my table.