I dig my fingers into the leather to control the urge to touch her. The truck dips into a pothole as I drive along the dirt road to get to the main one. A horrible pop-country song comes on and I press the knob to turn the noise off.
Silence is what we need right now.
I slowly turn right onto the road and head home. The sun has officially set, and the starry night is clear. It’s so crisp and vivid, I can differentiate the shades of black. Some spots are lighter, while others are so deep that it seems like that one spot holds a million stars.
It probably does.
So much beauty in the world and it’s overlooked by so much ugly. The world is so focused on the negative, on just surviving, that we've forgetten that something as simple as the night sky can make the day a smidge better.
Charlie turns to her side and wraps her arms around my leg as she sleeps, tugging herself closer. She’s latched on and too afraid to let go.
She might not ever be ready for the love I have to give, but I’ll be there the day she decides to take it.
All I can do is hope that time is on my side and that Charlie’s heart will know how to heal after I break the truth to her about Kenneth Hastings. He’s kept a rare, beautiful creature behind bars for far too long and it’s time to integrate her into the world again.
She’s a force to be reckoned with and I have no doubt she’s going to unleash the fury that’s been building. Anyone in her way will suffer the consequences. She’s strong, the strength just hidden right now under exhaustion and defeat. With care and patience, it will reemerge.
Another night like tonight cannot happen. I might not be quick enough next time.
Instead of parking out front, I decide to drive around the back of the building where the carport is to hide the truck. I have no doubt Kenneth will come looking for her since she’s supposed to be working here with her dad.
Most of the guys are here by the looks of all the bikes parked. I check the rearview for the hundredth time to make sure my baby is still there where she needs to be. I’ll worry about her later. Right now, I need to get Charlie inside.
The hot night air creeps inside as soon as the door opens, and I see One standing there waiting for me. “How was it?” he asks.
Charlie mumbles in her sleep as I tuck my arms under her and lift. Holding her close, I step out of the truck, and One shuts the door gently. Charlie buries her face in the side of my neck and she releases a soft sigh, melting my fucking heart in the process.
“Not good, One. Not good at all. Let me get her in a bed and I’ll fill you in, okay?”
“Alright. I’ll unload your bike from the back and catch up with you.”
“Thanks man. Oh, hey—” I spin around just as he drops the tailgate. “—How is Taylor?”
“She’s okay. She can hardly walk to the bathroom without feeling pain. Driller is going to run more tests to make sure he didn’t miss anything.”
He better not have. I’ll be pissed if he overlooked an injury.
“She’ll be okay. I’ve been looking out for her.”
As always. There isn’t a day where One doesn’t have her back, just like he has mine. “Thanks. I just need a few minutes.” There’s a back stairwell that heads upstairs to the rooms where my sister is staying. I press my cheek against the top of her head as I climb the steps, the old wood groaning from my weight.
There are vintage lamps installed along the wall, the ones with the frosted glass to give a faint glow that’s just enough to see where I’m going.
When I get to the top, there’s a door straight ahead and I make a beeline for it. When I’m inside, I take a minute to appreciate how Mercy tried to preserve what was left of the Victorian home after half of it was turned into a shack for the Peep Show.
The walls are painted blood red and the bed is queen-sized with a black comforter and red pillows. This room definitely has a darker vibe than the one my sister is staying in. There’s a black dresser to the left and a gothic-style vanity in the far-right corner with an antique mirror hanging on the wall that gives me the creeps.
I bet if I look into it the ghost of my mom will appear.
I peel the comforter back with one hand and lie Charlie down. Her fire-burnt hair hangs in her face, and I smooth my knuckles over her cheek, taking the strand of hair with me to tuck it behind her ear.
“You’re safe now, Cupcake,” I repeat, hoping she can hear me in her dreams. I kiss her forehead, hating that I have to leave her. I don’t want her to wake up alone. I eye the black leather recliner next to the nightstand, debating if I want to sleep there tonight. Will it be too much? Will she be afraid if she sees me here?
I slip off her shoes and tuck them under the bed, then cover her with the soft comforter. Her pale skin against the darkness of the comforter gives her the appearance of a porcelain doll. Light copper lashes fan long shadows across her cheek and the longer I look at her, the more I see the healing bruises from a few weeks ago.
Never again.
“I’ll be right back, Cupcake. I promise.” I head to the closet and grab an extra pillow and blanket, then place them on the recliner for later.
Giving her one last look, I leave the door open so I can hear if she needs anything and head downstairs.
When my boots hit the floor, the weight of not having any sleep slams into me. I sway. All I want to do is sleep but I have a feeling shit is about to get worse before it gets better. I can ask Driller if he can give me something for tonight. If I can get one good night’s sleep, then that’s all I need. I’ll be good for another month after that.
I hear a few voices coming from the kitchen and my stomach rumbles, reminding me I haven’t eaten since breakfast. I slap my belly and push the silver door open with my boots. I groan when I smell steaks and hear them sizzling. I.E.D is by the stove, flipping the steaks on the flattop, laughing at Socks whose wrist is zip-tied to a pipe above him.
Only one man could have done that.
Zip-tie.
Who is currently cackling in the corner with Moose and Anvil.
“What’s going on in here?”
Everyone turns their head toward me at the same time while I take a seat in the corner where Mercy put a few booths.
“Ah, Socks is a newbie so Zip-tie is giving him shit,” I.E.D explains as he sets a black matte mug down in front of me that says, ‘Have Mercy at Mercy’s’ in white letters. “He said nothing was going to keep him from snatching a steak, so Zip-tie did something about it.” I.E.D. pours me a cup of coffee while wearing an apron.
It may or may not say, “Come kiss me and explode.”
“You look like shit.”
I snort before taking a sip of fresh coffee. “Well, thank you. That’s awfully kind of you, sir.”
“Everything okay with Charlie? She seems like a sweet girl.” Socks stretches for the plate of steaks that is just out of his reach.
I.E.D stomps over and slaps his hand with a spatula. “Don’t you dare.”
“Ow. You don’t have to be so mean about it.”
“You’re such a baby.” I.E.D rolls his eyes. “If anyone is going to eat first it is the VP.”
“Where’s Mercy?” I set my cup of coffee down on the wooden top of the booth and begin to wonder if one of these days Mercy will just leave us and never come back.