It was my grandmother. I pressed a button to put her on speakerphone. “Hey, Nan. It’s late there. Is everything okay?”
“Yes. Didn’t mean to alarm you. I’m having trouble sleeping, so I figured I’d check in on you. The last time we talked it was a sad state of affairs.”
So much had happened since then. “I’m doing quite well, actually.”
“You managed to get over the girl?”
I hesitated. “Not exactly. Uh…things took sort of an unexpected turn after we last spoke.”
She figured it out without me having to even say anything. “Oh my…”
“Yeah.” Over the next several minutes, I filled my grandmother in on the recent turn of events with Felicity. “Anyway, I know what you’re going to say—that spending more time with her is a terrible idea. But I can’t quit her as long as I’m here.”
“I’m not going to give you grief, Leo. After we spoke previously, I suspected it might not have been the last of her. As long as you’re prepared for the inevitable outcome, I see no problem with it.”
“You’re not going to lecture me, then?”
“What good would that do? Unlike my thick-headed daughter, I realize no amount of scolding is going to change things when it comes to matters of the heart. I don’t even try. There are times in life when we simply choose to jump into the fire, even if we know we’re going to get burned. We’ve all done it. And I’ll have you know, your mother is no stranger to that, either.”
“What does that mean? Are you holding back on me?”
“Let’s just say, before she married your father, there was a certain groundskeeper I’d spotted far too many times climbing down from your mother’s bedroom window.”
My jaw dropped. “Really…”
“Feel free to do what you will with that information. Although, if you call her out on it, she’ll likely say I’m senile and deny it. But I assure you, it’s true.”
I laughed. “Thanks for the tip, Nan.”
She sighed. “It’s a shame you can’t take a lesson from Sigmund. He never gets his heart involved in anything.”
“I haven’t let that happen until now. This is new for me. And I know it would be much easier to be more like Sigmund right now.”
She laughed. “The irony, of course, is that your cousin doesn’t have the same expectations placed upon him. He’d be perfect for a life of keeping up appearances.”
“Well, he’s keeping up with two women at the same time currently.”
“What’s new about that?”
“I mean, literally the same time. That’s what’s new.”
“Oh. He’s too much, that one.”
My cousin walked into the room.
“Speak of the devil, Nan. Sigmund just got here. I’m going to let you go. I need to fill him in on some things.”
“Okay. Love you, my boy. Tell my other grandson hello and to behave.”
“I will.” I hung up and turned to him. “Nan says to behave.”
“That’s why I’m her favorite.”
I tossed my phone aside. “So, I ran the Boston trip by Felicity, and we’ve decided to just stay here.”
“Ah. Taking advantage of having the house to yourself so you can have a shagfest in peace, eh?”
“I highly doubt that’s going to happen.”
“You expect me to believe that?”
“I don’t know what will happen. Whatever she wants.”
“You have no chill about this, and you know it. Stop acting like you’re not dying to fuck her. It’s the only time in your life you’ve had to wait for anything you’ve wanted.”
“We don’t have to have sex in order to enjoy each other.”
He examined my face. “All right, I’ll stop. It’s clear you really like her. And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m…starting to as well.”
I squinted. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Relax. I’ve got my hands full as it is. I don’t fancy your girl in that way. I just meant I can see now why you like her. She’s grown on me. I still maintain that you’re making a mistake and getting in over your head, but I’m not going to give you grief about it anymore.”
“I appreciate that.”
He left the room, and a few minutes later returned, throwing a box at my chest.
It was a gargantuan box of condoms.
“What the hell? I have my own, thanks. Who needs this many condoms, anyway?”
“The Marias took me to a wholesale store in Massachusetts. It’s called BJ’s Warehouse. Fitting name, eh?”
“You’re insane.”
“I got a three-pack of those boxes. You can keep that one.”
Shaking my head, I threw the box of condoms and hit him in the chest.
* * *
Felicity
Track 12: “Sunshine of Your Love” by Cream
Friday afternoon seemed to take forever to get here. I spent the morning cleaning my room and setting up some more of my planners, just to pass the time. I finally opted to put myself out of my misery and head over to Leo’s a little early.
The afternoon sun was shining brightly as I rang his doorbell.
He opened the door with a huge smile. “Welcome home, gorgeous.”
“I wish,” I said, giving him a once-over.
“Come in.”
Wow. He’d apparently just been weightlifting. He wore a pair of black workout tights. I never thought a man in tights could be sexy, but they really showed off the muscles in his legs, which I knew he worked hard on. A sheen of sweat glistened over his chest, and his big feet were bare, which I found incredibly hot.
“Did I interrupt your fitness regimen?”
“I thought you were arriving closer to three, so I figured I’d sneak a workout in, but getting to see you earlier is much better.” He looked down at my overnight bag, which was covered in tiny Hello Kitty heads. “You’re fucking adorable with that bag.”
“Hello Kitty. Did you expect anything else?” It fell to the ground with a thud as I looked around. “Sig already left?”
“Yes. We’re completely free. Although, he left you a present.”
Leo walked over to a glass cake display on the counter. Sig had baked something and left a sticky note on the front of the glass.
I peeled it off and read it.
A gingerbread for a gingerhead.
I know you’ll miss me this weekend. (Not!)
You and Leo will have to try to find a way to entertain each other. I’m sure you can figure something out, eh?
P.S. This is a new recipe. Hope you like it. I suggest adding some “Leo is whipped” cream, which is in the refrigerator.
Fondly,
Your Favorite Ball Buster
“He’s a joy, isn’t he?” Leo rolled his eyes. “At least it’s edible, unlike the majority of the crap he pulls.”
“I’m definitely going to devour that later.” Somehow my eyes were actually on Leo’s body when I said that. And I couldn’t help thinking how badly I wanted to devour him.