Shaking my head, I inhaled the soothing aroma of chamomile and frowned as a hint of bergamot and lemongrass filled the room. My inquiring stare slid to his, watching the smile that played on his lips.
“You love that scent,” he explained. “I know it calms you down when your anxiety is going full force.” He shrugged like it was nothing.
“You didn’t just purchase my clothes, did you?” I sighed, wondering how I’d missed it before. “You are the one who set up everything in this apartment, didn’t you?” I asked, settling back as he squirmed uncomfortably.
“Your dad planned to move the stuff from your old apartment into this one. I thought you’d prefer new things, but you’d also need supplies that you normally had on hand. It’s not a big deal, Xari.”
I leaned closer to him, smiling. “You know what scents keep me calm, and remembered how I liked my sugar to be in cubes, not granules. You’re one of the good ones, Noah Jameson.” Sipping the tea, I moaned before placing it down and turning back to him. “It’s perfect.”
“Good. Now, who were you dreaming about?” he winked, and I wrinkled my nose at his teasing.
“You don’t know him, but he was inside Axton’s club tonight. His name is Kieran Knight, and he’s a mercenary for hire, I guess.”
“The prick that has a pulse on the shadows?” he asked, and I narrowed my eyes in confusion. “I forgot you weren’t here when he and your father got into it several months back. But yeah, I thought they were going to kill each other a few times.”
“And you didn’t think that you should tell me about that?” I pointed out in irritation.
“No, Xar. A lot of shit happened while you were gone, and we’ve barely scratched the surface on it.” My shoulders drooped, and he frowned. “I don’t mean that you’ve done anything wrong. You know I don’t believe that,” he demanded, sipping his tea, then grimacing as it burned his mouth.
I wasn’t even sure why he was drinking it since he hated tea. Noah was part hellhound and part incubus demon. It left him with a hankering for meat and girls who enjoyed wall-banging. Herbal tea wasn’t his thing, nor was anything that smelled overly obnoxious. It explained his attention to detail, though.
“You’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing. You know that. You tend to the living and handle what you can. You don’t go ripping apart the entire town to find shit out. You do it within the order, and then you branch out. I just meant that we have a ton of crap that we need to sift through with a fine-toothed comb, but not tonight. Braelyn called, though, earlier. You had already gone to bed when she and Saint reached out. She said they’d get the Blackhawks ready to pick up the members of the fallen hunters families from the mouth of the valley in Montana. I called in a favor and have buses arriving first thing this morning. We will get them loaded and to the sanctuary when we wake up.”
“It’s three o’clock in the morning already,” I groaned, rubbing my eyes. “Tomorrow is going to suck big time.”
“I brought some of that chicory coffee you like back from New Orleans,” he offered, giving me a crooked smile when I groaned in delight at the idea of drinking it. “Thought you’d like it since you skipped out on the trip due to your absence and avoidance of the base,” he said, shrugging when I glared at his term for my break.
“I needed to leave here,” I admitted, running my fingers over the rim of the mug while he nodded. “I’m sorry that this situation puts you between Micah and me. I know you’re his best friend and mine. I couldn’t be here, and see them every morning and night. I just had to go away for a while, and I hated that I didn’t say goodbye to you or the girls.”
“We didn’t blame you for needing space, Xari. You did what you do best when you’re hurt; you ran.” Noah may not have wanted to admit it, but there was an edge of resentment in his tone. “Besides, shit happened pretty fast after you left. Your dad told Micah that he needed to do right by Meredith. She was already pregnant. A few months along when you took off,” Noah adjusted in his seat, leaning forward. “I wanted to tell you, but Xavier was against it. He didn’t want you running further than you already had.”
“No, finding out in the middle of a shit-show is so much better,” I muttered, fighting the emotion creeping up my throat.
“You should also know that they married on your original wedding date. It was convenient since you’d left, and they’d planned and arranged all the details for your nuptials.” He lowered his head but chanced a glance in my direction. “Your father said it would just go to waste, and that since Micah had knocked Meredith up, he should man the fuck up and do what was right. I guess he’d already decided to come clean, but hadn’t found the appropriate time to confess their relationship and tell you about the baby.”
I shook my head, fighting the urge to run away before it broke me again. I stood abruptly, and he mirrored my movements, sliding his gaze from me to the door, judging the distance. I sniffed, taking a step forward to study the panic in his pretty gray eyes.
“I’m just heading to bed, Noah. Are you coming?” I asked, knowing he wouldn’t take his sights off of me, worried I would run and leave him alone to handle the mess unfolding here.
“You can’t blame me, Xar. You’re a mother-fucking track star when shit goes sideways, and you think it might hurt you. You want me to stay?” he asked, scratching the back of his head.
“Did you plan on leaving my apartment tonight?”
“No, I was going to crash on the couch.”
“The sofa isn’t big enough to fit your ogre ass,” I snorted. “Come on. You can pet my head and tell me I’m pretty until I fall asleep.”
He chuckled. “I’m not petting you, asshole.”
“Can’t fault a girl for trying,” I chirped, climbing on the bed to fluff the pillows. “If you snore, I’m smothering your ass. Fair warning.”
“I’ll return the favor if you do the same,” he stated firmly, curling onto his side next to me. “I should have told you what happened when you left, but your calls were normally short, and only to check-in. We were all afraid of pushing you further away.”
“I always come back,” I admitted. “Even if I didn’t want to, I would have. You’re here, and this is my home. Our home,” I murmured sleepily.
“I hear you, but not knowing where you were or if you were okay, wasn’t easy on us, either. Now, go to sleep.”
I smirked, curling up closer to the heat of his body. His arm slipped over me before his nose brushed against my ear. I missed being held, but with Noah, it wasn’t sexual. It was just comfort, something we’d done on hunts when they’d gone sideways. We calmed one another and seemed to be pulled together through our shared pain. It was one of the things that Micah had resented about our relationship, but we’d never done anything wrong. Not like he and Meredith had, anyway.
Chapter Twelve
I woke to an arm crushing me and a tickle in my ear where Noah snored loudly in it. Groaning, I shoved him off of me and crawled out of bed, stretching before I tiptoed into the bathroom to relieve my body’s morning needs. Staring into the mirror, I brushed my teeth, glaring at the bags beneath my eyes and the dark circles that accenting them.