“You okay?” Willow asks once he’s gone.
“No.” There is no point in lying to my best friend. I know she can see right through me. “I don’t know how to do this, Wil. I don’t know how to be me without him.”
“Maybe you should talk to him. Try the long-distance thing.”
“I can’t do that to Grace. You should have seen her when she was talking about how he was staying close to home. They are all that each other has. I can’t be the reason he gets traded.”
“What if they trade him anyway?”
“They won’t.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I’m going to quit my job.”
“What? You love your job.”
“I do. I love it, and I love the Blaze. But I can’t go to work every day and see him. I can get a job with one of the bigger high schools or the football team. I’m going to ask Drew to help me. He owes me that.”
“You’ll ask him to help you find a new job, but you won’t ask him not to trade Cameron?”
“You should have heard him, Wil. His mind was made up, and my dad, it’s almost as if he encouraged it. He knew what this would do to me. Do to us. They both did, but that didn’t come up in their conversation. It’s business, not personal,” I say with disgust.
“Tell me what you need.”
“Cameron.”
“Oh, sweetie.” She sighs.
My phone vibrates in my hand, and I know it’s him. I shouldn’t look; I’m just torturing myself. He sent me a few texts last night, and I have yet to read them. I may as well get it over with. Let the knife in my heart twist a little deeper.
Cameron: Can we talk about this?
Cameron: Paisley.
Cameron: I’m going to fix this.
Cameron: I can’t lose you.
Cameron: You are the love of my life.
Cameron: I can’t sleep without you next to me.
Cameron: I can’t handle this. I can’t handle you not being in my life.
Cameron: How am I supposed to work there, knowing you’re not mine?
Cameron: The sun’s rising, and the last time I was up to watch that, you were in my arms.
Cameron: I know you were in there. That’s okay. I’m going to fix this. I’m going to make it right, and then I’m coming to get you. I let you walk away from me once, Paisley Monroe. I will not make that same mistake twice. This isn’t over.
Cameron: We are not over.
My hands shake as I read through his messages. He’s hurting. I’m hurting, but there isn’t another way. This is the only way to save his career and keep him close to his mom. He’s not thinking about other teams and how they will see us being together. Once he has some time to think about this, he’ll understand this truly is the only way.
It’s going to take time for the pain to lessen. I’m not sure it will ever go away. No, I know it won’t, but I’m hoping that with time it will get easier to hide it. I’m hoping it will be easier to pretend I didn’t shatter both of our hearts for the greater good.
This day is dragging. Cameron hasn’t texted me again, and that causes me relief and more pain. I’m well aware I’m an emotional basket case. It’s going to take some time. When my phone rings, I jump and fumble to check the screen. My shoulders fall when I see my mom’s face smiling back at me.
“Hey, Mom,” I answer.
“Hey, kid. I just wanted to thank you for picking Peyton up for me yesterday.”
“Anytime.” What I don’t say is me doing her a favor ripped my heart to shreds.
“What’s wrong?”
Great. Her mom-dar is on. I may as well pull the plug and get this conversation over with. “Cameron and I broke up.” I barely get the words out without bursting into tears.
“What? No.”
“Last night.”
“I never would have dreamed he would end things. He was so in love with you.”
The knife twists deeper.
He was so in love with you.
Was.
“I broke it off.”
“What? No way. What’s going on, Paisley?”
“Nothing. It just wasn’t going to work out.”
“I’m not buying that.”
“I’m sorry, Mom. I don’t know what else to tell you. It was time.”
“What are you not telling me?” she asks.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“When you’re ready, you know my number. Do you need anything? Ice cream?”
I give her a light chuckle. “No. Willow is here with me. We’ve been watching movies all day.”
“It helps to talk, and I have a hard time believing that the two of you are over. Things will work out.”
“Not this time.”
“Did he do something?”
“No. No, he’s… everything.”
“Paisley,” she says with pain in her voice. “I hate that you’re hurting. What can I do?”
“Nothing, Mom. I just need some time. Listen, I’m missing the movie. I need to go. I’ll call you in a few days. Love you.”
“Love you too.” I don’t wait for her to say more. I hit end and toss my phone beside me on the couch.
“You good?” Willow asks.
“I will be.” I hope.
“Why don’t we grab a hotel room for the night?” Willow suggests. “That way when he comes back, you won’t have to listen…” Her voice trails off.
“You know what? I love that idea. How soon can you be ready?” I ask.
“Give me five.” We both scurry from the couch to pack a bag.
Eight minutes later, we’re leaving our condo, overnight bags in hand. “I’ll drive,” I tell her.
“We should both drive. That way, he’s not beating on our door all night. He’ll know that neither of us is home.”
“Good plan.” I nod.
“Follow me.” Willow gives me a sad smile before climbing into her car. I do the same, following her all the way to the other side of town. Away from our condo and away from the stadium.
Away from Cameron.
Chapter 28
Cameron
The drive to the stadium didn’t take long. That could have something to do with my urgency to get there and my lead foot. I might have broken some speed limit laws, but this is of utter importance. I have to do this now. Today. I can’t go another night without her in my arms. It just can’t happen.
Pulling into the players’ lot, I park my truck and head inside. As soon as I hit the button to call the elevator, the door slides open. I should have called, but I know he’s here. He’s got at least one trade to take care of.
Mine.
The doors slide open, and his secretary smiles. “He in?” I ask her, not bothering to stop.
She nods as her smile drops. Apparently, I look as bad as I feel. I keep moving past her desk, my stride long and full of purpose as I reach his office door. I don’t knock. Instead, I walk on in like I own the place. Drew looks up from his computer and smiles.