She eyeballed me over her shoulder. “Don’t tempt me to like him again. I don’t want to.”
I bit my lip. “He rescued children from a burning house.”
“Goddammit, Winnie.” Ellie pulled a big knife from the block on the counter and sliced each sandwich in half. White cheese oozed out over thick slices of bacon.
Despite my broken heart, my mouth watered. “What kind is this again?”
“This is bacon and brie with peach bourbon jam.” She licked her fingers. “And it’s so good, it’s going to make you forget all about hot single dads who rescue children from burning houses.”
“And sew.”
“And sew.” Ellie placed each sandwich onto a plate next to a pile of salad greens tossed with vinaigrette.
“And adopt cats.”
She grimaced as she set one plate in front of me. “And adopt cats.”
“And have magic hands and big dicks and give you multiple orgasms every time.”
Ellie shook her head. “You’re killing me.”
“Sorry. I had to get it out.” I picked up my sandwich. “But this looks delicious and it’s going to make everything all better. Dexter who?”
She laughed as she poured us more wine. “I mean, it might not give you multiple orgasms, but it is a damn good sandwich.”
After dinner, Ellie walked me out to my car and hugged me goodbye. “I’ll see you in two weeks,” she said, “and I’ll miss you like mad in between.”
“Same. Thanks for dinner—and for always making me feel better.”
“Of course.” Releasing me, she folded her arms over her chest. “You gonna be okay?”
I nodded, happy that my throat didn’t close up. “Yes. I have my family, I have you, I have my cat, I have a new job waiting for me—how much more can I ask for?”
“You can ask for anything,” she said fiercely. “And you’d deserve it.”
“Thanks.” I smiled and glanced up at the sky, taking a deep breath of cool autumn air. “I’ll try to remember that.”
“Win, I’m curious. If Dex had asked you not to take this job and make this move, would you have stayed?”
“Honestly, I don’t know.” I thought for a moment. “But it would have been nice to know that he felt strongly enough to ask for something big and crazy like that.” I laughed. “That’s how I want to be loved—big and crazy. Because that’s how I love.”
She nodded. “I know. Drive carefully, okay? And text me all the time.”
“I will. Love you.”
“Love you too.” She blew me a kiss, and I drove away.
The next morning, I left my parents’ house bright and early, kissing them goodbye and setting out for my new life, determined to leave my broken heart behind.
Twenty-Five
Dex
The crunching woke me even before the shit-talking.
Through the haze of a dream—in which I was trying to climb a tree to rescue Freddie Purrcury, who just kept jumping from branch to branch—I heard the crackle of a bag and then loud munching. Were those little shitheads eating chips for breakfast?
“Daddy’s earlobes are funny. Don’t you think?” Crunch, crunch, crunch.
“Funny like how?” Luna asked.
“I don’t know.” Hallie stuck something in her mouth and spoke around it. “They’re just so big and lobey.”
Luna giggled. “Yeah.”
More crackling of the bag. More crunching. And if I wasn’t mistaken, I felt some crumbs drop onto my chest.
“Hallie, look what you did. You got Cheetos in Daddy’s chest hair.”
I felt someone blowing on me. “Now they’re gone.”
“No. You missed some. Right there, it’s orange. See?”
“Be careful, Luna. You’re gonna drip.”
That’s when I felt a cold splat on my belly.
I opened my eyes and saw a purple blob at the top of my abs. “What the hell is that?”
“It’s jelly from my toast.” Luna leaned over and slurped it up like an anteater. “Sorry.”
“Jesus Christ.” I looked at Hallie, who held a bag of Cheetos. Her fingers were coated with bright orange. “Is that supposed to be your breakfast?”
She shrugged. “I was hungry.”
“Your sister made toast. You couldn’t at least pour cereal?”
“She didn’t make toast, she dumped grape jelly on a piece of bread.”
“I was scared to use the toaster,” Luna confirmed with her mouth full.
I dropped my head back onto the pillow. “What time is it?”
“It’s after seven. We got an email from Winnie, want to hear it?”
No, I didn’t. Just hearing her name was hard enough. She’d been gone for ten days, and it seemed like she’d been on my mind for every minute of them. Every time I thought about her, my chest hurt. I’d picked up my phone to call her a thousand times, but hearing her voice wasn’t going to make me miss her less. I thought about texting, but it seemed selfish—she’d asked for time, and I wanted to give it to her.
Plus, I didn’t exactly trust myself not to say something crazy.
I’m an idiot. Come back. I love you. Stay with me.
But I was desperate for news about her too. Was she okay? How was her new apartment? Her new job? Did she love it? Did she miss home? Did she miss me? Every time I thought of her in that soft white sweater, I pined for her a little more. Was it possible I’d never hold her in my arms again?
“Can you read it to me?” I asked.
Hallie went to get her iPad, and Luna wiped her sticky hands on her nightgown. “I got some jelly on the counter,” she told me. “And on the floor.”
“Great.”
“And Freddie Purrcury stepped in it.”
I frowned. “Even better.”
Hallie returned, carrying her iPad instead of her Cheetos. “Dear Hallie and Luna,” she read. “I was so happy to get your email and the photos you sent. You did a great job painting your nails! I miss playing salon with you too. My new job is keeping me very busy. I meet lots of new people every day. Piglet misses you too. She isn’t used to our new home yet, and I think she is mad at me about the move. But it’s very nice, even if my next-door neighbors are not as fun as you. You asked when I was coming home for a visit, and the answer is next weekend. I will be there from Friday to Sunday for a work event at Cloverleigh Farms. I don’t know if you will be with your mom or your dad, but let me know and maybe we can work something out. After that, I am not sure when I will be home next. Write back soon and send me more pictures. Here is one for you. Love, Winnie.”
“Did she send you a picture?” I asked, desperate to see her face.
“Yes.” Hallie showed me the screen, and my heart lurched at the sight of Winnie’s deep blue eyes, soft smile, and pink cheeks. She held Piglet, who looked about as happy to be in the photo as I felt staring at it. Something the size of a golf ball was lodged in my throat.
“Where are we next weekend, Daddy?” Luna asked. “Can we see her?”