I’m in there for a little over two hours when the drama begins to unfold. The first thing to go out is a batch of cookies, made with salt instead of sugar, and thankfully for me, nobody taste tested them. The yelling comes from the dining room, right next to where the nursery is. I’m sitting on the ground with Star and two other bubs, playing with them, when I hear the chaos begin.
I glance over at the other girl, shrugging as she too looks over at the noise.
I stand and ask her to watch them so I can see what’s going on, and then I innocently go into the dining room and look to Delilah with a confused expression. “Is everything okay?”
“No, it’s not okay,” she mutters, drinking a long sip of water. “They put salt in the cookies, what sort of moron puts salt in the cookies.”
“We didn’t, it was sugar I swear,” Shakira says, her cheeks red. “I can get the packet.”
“We don’t want the packet, Shakira,” Sammi hisses. “We want our morning tea.”
Shakira looks to the girl beside her. “Well, ah, we’re having a few problems with that.”
“Like what?” Sammi demands.
“The cakes ... they’re not rising and they’re heavy and gooey. Everything is ruined.”
“Oh my god,” one of the other ladies says, shaking her head. “Did you do this on purpose?”
“No, of course not,” Shakira says, eyes wide. “We’d never.”
“I did see them coming in this morning with extra bags, I thought it was ingredients but they insisted I didn’t come into the kitchen, because I’d be a gossip about what they were doing,” I say, all innocently.
“Is this true?” Sammi asks.
“Is this some sort of revenge because of the other day at my house?” Delilah scoffs. “I had a feeling you ladies were up to something.”
“Appalling.”
“It’s not,” Shakira says, her eyes trained on me. “She’s a liar. She’s lying. She probably did it.”
“I’ve been in the nursery all morning, Shakira. I’m not that good,” I say, shaking my head. “I knew you were pissed at me, but to do something that could have made everyone sick, that’s low.”
“Go home,” Sammi says, shaking her head. “I’ve had about enough of you and your games, Shakira. Clean that kitchen up. Go home. I don’t want to see you. If anything like this happens again, you’re fired.”
Shakira looks horrified and glares at me in a way that promises revenge.
Then, she turns and leaves.
“Let me go and order you some morning tea,” I say to Delilah. “Eve has a wonderful café, she’ll be happy to help.”
“Thank you, Maggie. You’re a god send.”
I turn and walk out with a big smile on my face.
Indeed I am.
Indeed. I. Am.
I HAVE TO PEE, AND this god damned morning tea has gone into afternoon tea and now they want to stay for a dinner event that is apparently really important. I want to take Star home—she’s tired and grumpy—but Delilah swears we’ll only be another hour. I just ate for the first time today, and drank far more water than I should have, and now I need to go.
Shakira and her group of minions are in the nursery now, too. She ended up staying when Sammi wanted to hang around. Looking after your child on your own must be hard work. So, we’ve all been stuck in the nursery and then out in the garden once it cooled down. I don’t know where there is a toilet down here, hell, I don’t know where there is a toilet anywhere.
“Where is the closest toilet?” I ask the girl who was with me in the nursery this morning.
“It’s three blocks down that way,” Shakira says, piping up.
I stare at her, and then place Star in the playpen we have on the grass and rush in the direction Shakira pointed. I can’t find a toilet, not anywhere, and instead I find an older lady and ask her where the closest one is.
“The nannies all use the same toilet,” she tells me, her voice all cold and bitchy, “in the nursery.”
Oh for crying out loud, that’s back upstairs.
Clenching, I run into the large building and up the stairs toward the nursery, passing a couple of nannies that have just come out of the toilet. They glare at me, but I don’t have time to stop and care about that. By the time I make it in, I’m that busting I just sit down and start peeing. It’s only after a few seconds that I stare down in absolute horror as pee comes out and starts tipping over the side of the toilet. Horrified, I leap up and look down to see the finest layer of cling film over the toilet bowl, pressed down by the lid.
Those bitches.
Those fucking bitches.
Pee flows over and tips over the floor, and even worse, my dress is soaked. The back of it must have fallen in when I stood up frantically. I stand, horrified, panties around my ankles, dress soaked in pee, the floor covered in pee, and shame washing up in my cheeks. Revenge, they got their revenge, and, of course, it was stronger and harder than mine.
It’s on.
It’s so fucking on I could rip their damned heads off.
But right now, I need to figure out what to do.
This mess isn’t going to be easily cleaned up.
I reach for some toilet paper to clean it up only to find ... there is none.
They took it all. Every hand towel, every roll of toilet paper, even the fucking floor mats. They made sure there was absolutely nothing left for me to clean it up with. My cheeks burn as I stare at the sopping wet floor, the mess of a toilet, and my soaked dress. I don’t know what to do. I can’t call Gabby, or Eve, or anyone because they’ll never get in.
There is only one person who can get in here, and it’s Hugh.
I take my phone from my purse I placed on the sink and dial Hugh’s number, my voice croaking in horror and shame when he answers.
“What’s happened? What’s goin’ on? You okay?”
“I’m at the country club,” I whisper, “those girls ... played a prank on me and now I’m stuck in the toilet and I don’t know what to do.”
“What did they fuckin’ do, I swear to god ...”
“They put cling film over the toilet,” I say, clenching my eyes shut as I’m forced to tell Hugh what happened, “and then they took all of the toilet paper, the hand towels, anything I can use to clean it up. I was busting to pee and, it’s on my dress, Hugh, I can’t go back out there ...”
“It’s okay. Hey, nothin’ to be ashamed of. Here’s what you’re goin’ to do. Take your dress off and use it to clean up. Do the best you can, use water if you have to. Then, you’re goin’ to find somewhere to hide until I get there. Sneak out, but find somewhere.”
“What if they’re waiting for me?”
“Then you fuckin’ walk out with your head held high and you give them the grin of their fuckin’ lives as you flaunt that gorgeous body and pretend like nothing has happened. Then, you find a place to hide and call me.”
“What about Star? She’s down with the nannies.”
“I’ll call Delilah. Don’t worry about that. I’ll be there soon.”
I hang up, take a deep breath, and then I unzip my dress, taking it off and using it to clean up. It takes me a while, and during that time there are a few knocks on the door. I can only hope and pray that the nannies can’t wait outside because it would look too suspicious. I take a shaky breath when I’m done, and stuff my dress into the bin before opening the door and peering out. It’s clear.